CARMELITE DCJ

[Guest ambrose]

here we go again......................................................

[Sixtina87]

[quote name='ambrose' date='Nov 18 2005, 11:33 PM']here we go again......................................................
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what now?????

[ofpheritup]

[quote name='ambrose' date='Nov 18 2005, 10:33 PM']here we go again......................................................
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JUST KEEP PRAYING. IT IS ALL IN GOD'S TIME.
HE KNOWS WHAT HE IS DOING.

[be_thou_my_vision]

Hi I'm new!
I read this entire conversation, and I relate with sixtina. I was in your shoes once, but through the hurt, you are purified. Believe me. My problem was not my "outgoingness," but I had depression for like a year when I was 15. I was turned down from many communities because of this. I am 18 now, and I have learned so much from the hurt. My favorite community, Sisters of St. Francis of Perpetual Adoration in Indiana, are just lovely and I would not have discovered them without the stuff that I got from other communities. One sister told me (after telling me that I would not be accepted) that if a door closes, then it's probably because God doesn't want me to go through it.
This hurt so bad because it felt like a death. I had this dream in my mind, and I was told that it was not possible. It hurts, but you will heal.
DO NOT RUSH. God leads you. The founder of Sisters of St. Francis of Perpetual Adoration said "he leads. I follow." It's true. It's not your place to guess where God wants you. It's an art-- you take Jesus' hand and he leads you. No guessing here, just patience.
DO NOT ENTER THE FIRST PLACE THAT ACCEPTS YOU. Don't enter somewhere because you finally got accepted. That is your will, not neccesarily God's. A lot of time during my discernment was devoted to research of different orders, correspondence, and surfing the web. All this time should have been spent listening.
Through time, I have come to realize that I would not have been the same without the hurt.
And to add onto what someone said about secular Carmelites, I am living proof. I am in formation. I am a Carmelite. The desert of Carmel echoes in my soul, and I search for my Beloved there. I am a Carmelite out here in the world. I bring Carmel to others, and they see it in me, and I in them. I just want you to see that it is a beautiful vocation, but I know it's not the same as being a sister. But really, seculars take the same vows, pray the Liturgy of the Hours, and live Carmel everyday. Isn't that they same as a Sister? I certainly think it is. I will consecrate myself to my Love through the vows (I have not taken them yet). I am convince that God loves me the same as He love religious sisters. I am totally His no matter what because my heart is forever His, even if I get married. I will give my heart and consecrate my life to God through the vows to my future husband (If I am called to get married, I don't know yet.).
I am still discerning a call to the religious life, but the secular Carmelites are a beautiful and God-centered, self-giving vocation as well.
I hope this helps a bit... DO NOT TRY TO HEAL YOUR PAIN BY RUNNING TO A DIFFERENT CONVENT. Take months (yes, months) to sit down and pray about the situation. If you feel called (not just want to) discern a vocation to the religious life, do so slowly and prayerfully.
I will keep you in my prayers.
Jenny

[Sixtina87]

[quote name='be_thou_my_vision' date='Dec 28 2005, 02:28 PM']Hi I'm new!
I read this entire conversation, and I relate with sixtina. I was in your shoes once, but through the hurt, you are purified. Believe me. My problem was not my "outgoingness," but I had depression for like a year when I was 15. I was turned down from many communities because of this. I am 18 now, and I have learned so much from the hurt. My favorite community, Sisters of St. Francis of Perpetual Adoration in Indiana, are just lovely and I would not have discovered them without the stuff that I got from other communities. One sister told me (after telling me that I would not be accepted) that if a door closes, then it's probably because God doesn't want me to go through it.
This hurt so bad because it felt like a death. I had this dream in my mind, and I was told that it was not possible. It hurts, but you will heal.
DO NOT RUSH. God leads you. The founder of Sisters of St. Francis of Perpetual Adoration said "he leads. I follow." It's true. It's not your place to guess where God wants you. It's an art-- you take Jesus' hand and he leads you. No guessing here, just patience.
DO NOT ENTER THE FIRST PLACE THAT ACCEPTS YOU. Don't enter somewhere because you finally got accepted. That is your will, not neccesarily God's. A lot of time during my discernment was devoted to research of different orders, correspondence, and surfing the web. All this time should have been spent listening.
Through time, I have come to realize that I would not have been the same without the hurt.
And to add onto what someone said about secular Carmelites, I am living proof. I am in formation. I am a Carmelite. The desert of Carmel echoes in my soul, and I search for my Beloved there. I am a Carmelite out here in the world. I bring Carmel to others, and they see it in me, and I in them. I just want you to see that it is a beautiful vocation, but I know it's not the same as being a sister. But really, seculars take the same vows, pray the Liturgy of the Hours, and live Carmel everyday. Isn't that they same as a Sister? I certainly think it is. I will consecrate myself to my Love through the vows (I have not taken them yet). I am convince that God loves me the same as He love religious sisters. I am totally His no matter what because my heart is forever His, even if I get married. I will give my heart and consecrate my life to God through the vows to my future husband (If I am called to get married, I don't know yet.).
I am still discerning a call to the religious life, but the secular Carmelites are a beautiful and God-centered, self-giving vocation as well.
I hope this helps a bit... DO NOT TRY TO HEAL YOUR PAIN BY RUNNING TO A DIFFERENT CONVENT. Take months (yes, months) to sit down and pray about the situation. If you feel called (not just want to) discern a vocation to the religious life, do so slowly and prayerfully.
I will keep you in my prayers.
Jenny
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wow!!!! I'm totally speachless......

[be_thou_my_vision]

[quote name='Sixtina87' date='Dec 28 2005, 03:08 PM']        wow!!!! I'm totally speachless......    
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Why are you speechless?

[Sixtina87]

[quote name='be_thou_my_vision' date='Dec 28 2005, 04:10 PM']Why are you speechless?
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i just am. i cant find the right words to say, so that makes me speachless!!!!

[be_thou_my_vision]

[quote name='Sixtina87' date='Dec 28 2005, 03:13 PM']i just am. i cant find the right words to say, so that makes me speachless!!!!
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I mean are you mad about something I wrote or do you find comfort in them or what?

[Sixtina87]

no, i'm not mad or upset or anything along those lines.....
i found your entry wonderful and i felt as if i was in the same place with you....since we have experienced the same things, such as depression and rejection.....thats all!!!!!!1

[be_thou_my_vision]

Ohhh good, I didn't want to upset you.
I used to be very restless in my vocation. VERY restless, and I think you are experiencing what I used to experience. I was totally obsessed with religious life, and then I realized that I am me. God made me. I like me. And God likes me. I am different than everyone else. I don't really know all of me, so Jesus, teach me who I am. So I am on a quest for Jesus to teach me who I am. I am not too concerned with vocation stuff, because in all reality, IT DOESN'T REALLY MATTER. Marriage is not that much different than the religious life. So I decided to calm down and enjoy my life. You might miss it.
I totally understand what you are going through. You are so excited to give your life to God, and you are sure that He is calling you to the religious life and you will make the best nun. You love the Lord and He is your spouse already.
That's me, only 2 years ago. I got out of that "funk" by prayer. And the Lord is my spouse, no matter what state of life I am called to.
So pray for peace, and to get rid of the urgency.
I will pray for you!
Also, where are you in school? What year? Did you go to a private or public school?
Jenny

[alicemary]

Jenny what a wonderful post, thank you for sharing with the phatmass family. The older you get, the more you will find rejection in one form or another in your life. But it is not really rejection, you are called to follow a different path, and it is the Lord's subtle(and not so subtle!!) way of making Himself known in your life.
How wonderful that you have found the Carmelites! And how lucky they found you. Please share more!
Alicemary

[be_thou_my_vision]

I am absolutely delighted that you find wisdom in my post!
I totally agree with you about the "different path" way of looking at it.
As I get older, I see that suffering and being wrong about things are blessing because I learn that it is a way to be humble. I don't really understand being humble about things, but being wrong and being repremanded (sp?) are good ways to start.
I have an amazing thirst in me for the things of God... suffering, joy, love, you name it, I want it if it gives my Beloved glory.
Being a Carmelite is like standing beside the ocean, but having that same ocean inside of you. It is all-consuming, fierce, yet secure knowing you are sheltered in God's hand.
It's amazing... all you girls who are discerning a call to the religious life... do not think that the secular or third orders are less "serious" than the actual cloisters. It is a different way of expressing the love of God through vows, living in the world.
AMAZING is all I have to say about being a Carmelite.

[passionheart]

First of all welcome Jenny.

Your post was wonderful. It speaks the TRUTH about our walk with the Lord. I know I have experienced what you spoke about so I believe your words will bring comfort to many.

Also, you are right about Carmelite spirituality. It was through the house of Carmel that I first leaned about the possiblity to be intimate with God. St. Teresa and St. John of the Cross have been great teachers in my life.

DonnaMarie

[alicemary]

As you find your niche in the Carmel spirituality, I find mine in the Dominicans. They also have a wonderful, very active Third order. Sadly none are in the area I live in, though how I wish there was. We each have our own path in this life, be it in the religious life, married or single life or embracing a Third Order as a single or married.

[be_thou_my_vision]

Bl. Elizabeth of the Trinity is one of my favorites, plus of course the Little Flower.
St. John of the Cross and St. Teresa are amazing....
Wow wow saints are good for us down here!
Jenny

[be_thou_my_vision]

[quote name='alicemary' date='Dec 28 2005, 04:18 PM']As you find your niche in the Carmel spirituality, I find mine in the Dominicans. They also have a wonderful, very active Third order. Sadly none are in the area I live in, though how I wish there was.  We each have our own path in this life, be it in the religious life, married or single life or embracing a Third Order as a single or married.
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Dominicans are wonderful because they study and learn about stuff in the world, science, people, etc. And then they see God through it and praise him for His creation. It's amazing... a new way of looking at the world. I find their spirituality interesting.

[be_thou_my_vision]

[quote name='alicemary' date='Dec 28 2005, 04:18 PM']As you find your niche in the Carmel spirituality, I find mine in the Dominicans. They also have a wonderful, very active Third order. Sadly none are in the area I live in, though how I wish there was.  We each have our own path in this life, be it in the religious life, married or single life or embracing a Third Order as a single or married.
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Dominican spirituality is amazing and absolutely wonderful. 'Nough said.

[Sixtina87]

[quote name='be_thou_my_vision' date='Dec 28 2005, 04:32 PM']Ohhh good, I didn't want to upset you.
I used to be very restless in my vocation. VERY restless, and I think you are experiencing what I used to experience. I was totally obsessed with religious life, and then I realized that I am me. God made me. I like me. And God likes me. I am different than everyone else. I don't really know all of me, so Jesus, teach me who I am. So I am on a quest for Jesus to teach me who I am. I am not too concerned with vocation stuff, because in all reality, IT DOESN'T REALLY MATTER. Marriage is not that much different than the religious life. So I decided to calm down and enjoy my life. You might miss it.
I totally understand what you are going through. You are so excited to give your life to God, and you are sure that He is calling you to the religious life and you will make the best nun. You love the Lord and He is your spouse already.
That's me, only 2 years ago. I got out of that "funk" by prayer. And the Lord is my spouse, no matter what state of life I am called to.
So pray for peace, and to get rid of the urgency.
I will pray for you!
Also, where are you in school? What year? Did you go to a private or public school?
Jenny
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back when i started my discernment, i was so obesssed with nuns that i would seriously "look" for them where ever i went!!!! IDK something about them made me jsut adore them...now i'm not like that!!!! i found that my craziness over religious got me in trouble.....
I just graduated HS in May, i work in retail now which i got through community service helping a religious siter with each yr....i went to a private school where the FSGM sisters taught....but i experienced both public and private schools in my life!!!

[Mary-Kathryn]

[quote name='alicemary' date='Dec 28 2005, 05:18 PM']As you find your niche in the Carmel spirituality, I find mine in the Dominicans. They also have a wonderful, very active Third order. Sadly none are in the area I live in, though how I wish there was.  We each have our own path in this life, be it in the religious life, married or single life or embracing a Third Order as a single or married.
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AliceMary,

I read your post about your leanings towards the Third Order Dominicans and did a bit of a search. Do these help at all?

[url="http://www.3op.org/"]http://www.3op.org/[/url]

[url="http://www.3op.org/findachapter.php#5"]http://www.3op.org/findachapter.php#5[/url]

I know when I was called to the Lay/Secular/Third Order vocation it took me quite a long time--call me slow, it took years-- to take the step and seriously discern what God Willed. I am humbled and grateful to now be in first promises as a Secular Carmelite. This vocation, along with my vocation as wife and mother, brings so much joy and peace to me--and then to my family !

[be_thou_my_vision]

[quote name='Mary-Kathryn' date='Dec 29 2005, 09:11 AM']AliceMary,

I read your post about your leanings towards the Third Order Dominicans and did a bit of a search. Do these help at all?

[url="http://www.3op.org/"]http://www.3op.org/[/url]

[url="http://www.3op.org/findachapter.php#5"]http://www.3op.org/findachapter.php#5[/url]

I know when I was called to the Lay/Secular/Third Order vocation it took me quite a long time--call me slow, it took years-- to take the step and seriously discern what God Willed.  I am humbled and grateful to now be in first promises as a Secular Carmelite.  This vocation, along with my vocation as wife and mother, brings so much joy and peace to me--and then to my family !
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Ohhh I love Carmel! I only looked at Carmelites, and knew it was where I was supposed to be (for now at least, still discerning). What were some of the secular/third/lay orders like? Why did you choose Carmelite?