i don't feel good

[photosynthesis]

I am in a REALLY REALLY bad mood. i hate everything and everyone and most people aren't on my 'good list.' i am not a nice person.



pretty much everyone I've talked to has been nice to me. but i have been/am being really mean to everyone i know and i feel horrible and depressed and i hate my life. i don't see what the point of this is anymore.

my best friend in the whole world died...last year. every day it gets closer and closer to thanksgiving, which used to be one of my favorite holidays but now it is the WORST HOLIDAY EVER because he died on thanksgiving break. then the semester will end, then it will be his birthday. We were in love, and if he were to be alive right now we would be engaged and planning an awesome Hebrew Catholic wedding and looking forward to growing old together.

I want to scream and throw things and cry and scare away the deer and the tourists, but nothing comes out.

please pray.

Edited November 15, 2005 by photosynthesis

[photosynthesis]

I was so sad today that I skipped chorus.

for those of you that know me, that's like a sign of the apocalypse.

i NEVER skip chorus.

[scardella]

If it makes you feel any worse, I broke up with my (then) fiancee the week of thanksgiving 3 years ago.

[photosynthesis]

[quote name='scardella' date='Nov 14 2005, 09:27 PM']If it makes you feel any worse, I broke up with my (then) fiancee the week of thanksgiving 3 years ago.
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well, i don't know if it makes me feel worse...

but I'm sorry.

[Extra ecclesiam nulla salus]

Im sorry that your boyfriend died. It is so sad.

ill pray for you.


sam

[photosynthesis]

[quote name='Extra ecclesiam nulla salus' date='Nov 14 2005, 09:36 PM']Im sorry that your boyfriend died. It is so sad.

ill pray for you.
sam
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thank you...

it is sad, but the good news is he became Catholic before he died... he always said becoming Catholic is the most Jewish thing you can ever do!

[photosynthesis]

please pray for me...

i am really tempted to tell life, "YOU CAN'T FIRE ME BECAUSE I QUIT!" ineed hardcore prayers!!!

[Socrates]

[quote name='photosynthesis' date='Nov 14 2005, 10:34 PM']please pray for me...

i am really tempted to tell life, "YOU CAN'T FIRE ME BECAUSE I QUIT!"   ineed hardcore prayers!!!
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Isn't that James Dean's line from the movie "Giant"?

[photosynthesis]

[quote name='Socrates' date='Nov 14 2005, 10:50 PM']Isn't that James Dean's line from the movie "Giant"?
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I don't know... maybe? I slept through most of "Topics in American Cinema."

[morostheos]

Definite prayers for you!!!!

Just think of what he would want for you in your life - and know that he's probably up in heaven praying for you like crazy too!

[philothea]

Oh no!

Prayers for you. I'm so sorry you are going through this.

[homeschoolmom]

[quote] i don't feel good[/quote]

The lesser known James Brown song...

[img]http://www.foxnews.com/images/114774/3_22_brown_james_mugshot.jpg[/img]

[photosynthesis]

[quote name='homeschoolmom' date='Nov 15 2005, 12:14 AM']The lesser known James Brown song...

[img]http://www.foxnews.com/images/114774/3_22_brown_james_mugshot.jpg[/img]
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hahahahahaha!!!

you crack me up!!! that is SO what I look like after not sleeping for 2 days (which is what's been going on)1!!

this made me smile

[homeschoolmom]

Oh, good... I wasn't trying to make light of your pain... I'm just being silly...

[ardillacid]

[quote name='photosynthesis' date='Nov 14 2005, 09:10 PM']I am in a REALLY REALLY bad mood.  i hate everything and everyone and most people aren't on my 'good list.'  i am not a nice person.



pretty much everyone I've talked to has been nice to me.  but i have been/am being really mean to everyone i know and i feel horrible and depressed and i hate my life.  i don't see what the point of this is anymore. 


please pray.
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You were nice and found a squirrel pic yesterday which will be shared with my fellow squirrels so thank you

[photosynthesis]

I'm glad you liked it!! that squirrel's muscles were so big he could kill a zombie!

[photosynthesis]

Thank you to all who were praying for me...last night was a difficult night for me, and I was tempted to do something horrible...(i'm pretty sure it wouldn't take too much imagination to guess what it is)

I didn't sleep or anything, but I got a call from one of my best friends who hasn't called me in awhile... and that helped a lot! And in the middle of the night, I went to check my mail, and I got a letter from one of my very good friends who entered the Dominican Sisters of St. Cecilia. I hadn't heard from her in a year!!! Her letter helped too!

along with her letter she sent me all these holy cards (like i don't have holy cards taking over my room already

one of them said this:

[quote name='A Meditation by St. John Henry Newman']God has created me to do Him some definite service; He has commited some work to me which He has not committed to another.  I have my mission--I may never know it in this life, but I shall be told it in the next.

I am a link in a chain, a bond of connection between persons.  He has not created me for nothing.  I shall do good, I shall do His work.

Therefore I will trust Him.  Whatever, wherever I am.  I cannot be thrown away. 

If I am in sickness, my sickness may serve Him;
In perlexity, my perplexity may serve Him;
If I am in sorrow, my sorrow may serve Him.

He does nothing in vain.  He knows what He is about.  He may take away my friends, He may throw me among strangers.  He may make me feel desolate, make my spirits sink, hide my future from me--still He knows what He is about.
[/quote]

This was exactly what I needed to hear... and God gave it to me at just the right time!

I'm still feeling really bad and I miss my friend a lot, but I no longer want to do anything horrible to myself.

thank you to all who were/are praying for me...

Edited November 15, 2005 by photosynthesis

[scardella]

[quote name='photosynthesis' date='Nov 15 2005, 09:48 AM']This was exactly what I needed to hear...  and God gave it to me at just the right time!

I'm still feeling really bad and I miss my friend a lot, but I no longer want to do anything horrible to myself.

thank you to all who were/are praying for me...
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Yay!

[theculturewarrior]

I'm glad you're doing better.

Just think of what it would be like for the people who love you, if you did something horrible to yourself. That would be an even worse anniversary.

I'm still praying for you!

[photosynthesis]

[quote name='theculturewarrior' date='Nov 15 2005, 11:15 AM']I'm glad you're doing better.

Just think of what it would be like for the people who love you, if you did something horrible to yourself. That would be an even worse anniversary.

I'm still praying for you!
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they'd be fine~