Shyness Is A Sin

[heavenseeker]

um Uruviel.. how can shyness have an intent?

[uruviel]

if you intended to avoid someone because you didn't like them...? I don't know... let me look up the real meaning of shy.

1 : easily frightened : TIMID
2 : disposed to avoid a person or thing <publicity shy>
3 : hesitant in committing oneself : CIRCUMSPECT
4 : sensitively diffident or retiring :

when I'm shy, I'm not 1-3 or 4. But number 2 is a way in which you could actually intend on being rude, avoiding someone.

[heavenseeker]

but there is avoiding because you're shy and avoiding to be rude if your doing it because you're shy then there isn't anything wrong with it

[dairygirl4u2c]

so are all you guys saying someone who is shy has no duty whatsoever to overcome their shyness?

I don't think anyone would say that.

So, sure, you aren't always sinning just because you happen to be shy or are shy sometimes in act. But otherwise, genereally you do sometimes have to overcome it.

Is there anyone who thinks you never have to try to overcome it? That you can just content yourself with living within your comfort zone and never expand?

btw.. the title of this thread is just to catch attention. i don't believe shyness is a sin or even considering it. i am only considering that it is sometimes. or that is, not acting to go beyond your tendency more accurately is.

Edited December 30, 2006 by dairygirl4u2c

[Mercy me]

I actually have struggled with this issue because I am very shy. The proplem with being shy is that I find myself committing sins of omission like failing to reach out. I really have to work to overcome this. So, shyness is not a sin in and of itself. It is, however, a cross.

[heavenseeker]

[quote name='dairygirl4u2c' post='1151954' date='Dec 30 2006, 12:36 AM']
so are all you guys saying someone who is shy has no duty whatsoever to overcome their shyness?

I don't think anyone would say that.

So, sure, you aren't always sinning just because you happen to be shy or are shy sometimes in act. But otherwise, genereally you do sometimes have to overcome it.

Is there anyone who thinks you never have to try to overcome it? That you can just content yourself with living within your comfort zone and never expand?

btw.. the title of this thread is just to catch attention. i don't believe shyness is a sin or even considering it. i am only considering that it is sometimes. or that is, not acting to go beyond your tendency more accurately is.
[/quote]
with that new wording of the question then yeah in some cases being sh ycan be a problem but you dont have to overcome it it just might help you if you do

[Guest phatdaddy]

oops wrong account

Edited December 30, 2006 by phatdaddy

[uruviel]

Sorry that was me ^

I never said it's anything to be proud of. Yes, you should try to get rid of it because at times it can be a bad 'habit' or whatever you want to call it. But I don't think it is a wrong, thus it would not be offending God if you didn't correct it.

[Paddington]

dairygirl,

I like this thread, because of my personal experiences. I think that it is an everyday thing, and in many ways, that people say and write things that CAN LOGICALLY BE PERCEIVED as meaning that shyness is a flaw (i.e. sin). Sometimes it is by a worldy standard. Sometimes people are just expressing their preferences. Sometimes it is about a legitimate spiritual thing. When it is a legitimate spiritual issue (e.g. anxiety, coldness, fearfulness, sin of omission), it is still NEVER the same as a condemnation of the shy personality, shy temptations or shy behavior. People making an examination of conscience should NEVER ask themselves if they have been shy. People who are setting goals should not put "not being shy" on their list. I think that sticking up for a person is a good goal. I think cracking a smile at people a few times a day is a good goal. I think being polite is a good goal. I think trying to respectfully comfort somebody who is down is a good goal. It is all about following God's commands. What else is there?

It is actually more dangerous to be one of those people who talks a lot. "Where words are many, sin is not far." I regret things I have said more often than things I have not said. I think that is pretty normal of me.

Peace
Paddington

[morostheos]

[quote name='Mercy me' post='1151960' date='Dec 30 2006, 07:50 AM']
I actually have struggled with this issue because I am very shy. The proplem with being shy is that I find myself committing sins of omission like failing to reach out. I really have to work to overcome this. So, shyness is not a sin in and of itself. It is, however, a cross.
[/quote]



Shyness itself is certainly not a sin, but there are definitely sins that can stem from it:

-sins of omission, when you should have said/done something but didn't
-vanity - not saying anything because you're afraid of what others might think of you (rather than what God thinks of you)


These things are definitely sins, and hinder our relationship with God. I don't know about everyone else here, but personally my shyness stems from worrying what others think, so it is a sin in that way and something which I must work to overcome.

[jwangkal]

is a shy person a snob?

[dairygirl4u2c]

thanks moro, that stuff is what i was referring to.

a specific form of omission i was thinking of, not that you would, is that God intends us to form relatinoships, most of us i think, and not to could be very wrong. it depends on what God is calling you to. obviously not doing what God intends is wrong.

i made the mistake kinda like people make who say being gay is a sin, when they mean acting on the gayness is a sin.

Edited January 2, 2007 by dairygirl4u2c

[Proud2BCatholic139]

Everyone has different personality traits. There are introverts and extroverts. It's the way a person's brain functions. If we were all made to be extroverts, then the whole world would not be quiet and constantly talk with no silence. If the whole world were made introverts, there will be a world with thinkers. God created every human being just the way they are.

God created every single human being, and we are good!! Don't be discouraged if you are shy! God gave you special talents. Being shy can have many advantages, but, I can relate because I have been pretty shy.

Try spending time with your friends that you have. I'm sure with time, your shyness will slowly disappear.

Also, pray and ask the Holy Spirit to help you over come your shyness just a little bit.

God bless.

[Tony]

[quote name='JP3' post='1154519' date='Jan 2 2007, 09:10 AM']
is a shy person a snob?
[/quote]

absolutely not!

[dairygirl4u2c]

who what why when how, to what extent and in what context

[CrossCuT]

[quote name='cmotherofpirl' post='1150678' date='Dec 27 2006, 08:19 PM']shyness is genetic[/quote]
[size=1]Shyness is genetic???????
Personality traits are not genetic, they deal with the way you develop mentally according to your environment and the levels of interaction with others.

If shyness is a sin, then so is depression, anxiety, stress, phobias, schizophrenia, bibliomania, and other such things that deal with our mental state.

Things like shyness are parts of our personality that have developed through ageing and how we have been exposed to different things in our life.
If someone has been brought up to being afraid of certain things through no fault of their own, may be more likely to be shy than a sibling who has not experienced the same thing.

To hold this against a shy individual is not fair because they cant help it.
Maybe with some help from a psychologist they can get over their fears or anxieties, but until then it isnt a sin if they are not freely choosing to do wrong or neglecting anything. (And this of course is all assuming they are doing something WRONG by being shy...which would be strange)

Shyness is not a sin.
[/size]

[Lena]

[b]Shyness is most definitely not a sin.[/b] It can, however, present limitations on someone's life. But we're all limited in some way.

I suppose some people would call me shy, but really I'm just quiet around people I don't know very well, and would rather hear other people talk. The only times this trait bothers me is when it gets perceived by others negatively---like I've heard from other people, who will tell me, "wow, you look tired" or "you look kind of pissed off"---I'm sorry I'm just not talking your ear off, I'm simply listening! I don't think it's a bad trait necessarily, but I do know [i]extremely[/i] shy people and I feel for them.

It's funny because my sister is the most loud, borderline obnoxious, in-your-face person I know. Which is what most people seem to like.

Edited December 11, 2007 by Lena

[Justin86]

Ever notice how these days "sin" is whatever we don't like or find unattractive, instead of what offends God?

[cathoholic_anonymous]

[quote name='dairygirl4u2c' post='1154661' date='Jan 2 2007, 07:03 PM']thanks moro, that stuff is what i was referring to.

a specific form of omission i was thinking of, not that you would, is that God intends us to form relatinoships, most of us i think, and not to could be very wrong. it depends on what God is calling you to. obviously not doing what God intends is wrong.

i made the mistake kinda like people make who say being gay is a sin, when they mean acting on the gayness is a sin.[/quote]

Shyness does not preclude you from forming relationships. At all. A hermit who never sees another person for years at a time can be just as closely and intimately connected with the world as a person who is really outgoing and is always organising the social events for church.

The trouble is that you are trying to apply a tight definition on what it means to form relationships, and it's stringent definitions like this that are responsible for the well-intentioned but very cruel urge to put autistic people like me through hellish, invasive programmes of 'cure' and 'intervention' so that we can go to loud crowded birthday parties and make small talk with the lady in the hair salon. My behaviour and that of other autistics can manifest as extreme shyness. (I climb out of my window if I can hear that there are too many people standing in the corridor outside.) Nearly everybody assumes that we want to be liberated from this, and that it is a flaw in us if we don't want to reach a point when we can attend those birthday parties and talk to that hairdresser. But consider this: we already give to the world, in our own way. We already form relationships, again in our own way - and those relationships are just as valuable as the relationships between bubbly, extroverted people. This doesn't just apply to people with autism, which is a complex and pervasive neurological condition, but to any shy person. There's nothing about shyness that demeans people. There's nothing about shyness that stops them from being loving. There's no sin in it.

[ardillacid]

[quote name='heavenseeker' post='1151349' date='Dec 29 2006, 12:20 AM']um Uruviel.. how can shyness have an intent?[/quote]


PWND