Self-flagellation

[faithfulrock3r]

I was wondering what people's thoughts were on self-flagellation (causing pain to oneself, usually through lashes). Unable to break the hold of sin (mainly masturbation), it has recently held a certain appeal to me, a way to show God I'm really sorry. Your thoughts?

[jeffpugh]

A great priest I know gave this advice about that very problem... (aside from Confession): Cold Shower

Try that when you get the urge. Keep fighting the temptation. We're here to pray for ya.

†

[Brother Adam]

I think that perhaps a deeper look into your spiritual life is likely in order. You should not take up this type of penance without the very careful guidance and direction of the Church. My personal testimony regarding this topic can be read here: [url="http://www.catecheticsonline.com/apologetics_sexuality.php"]http://www.catecheticsonline.com/apologetics_sexuality.php[/url]

[jswranch]

[quote name='faithfulrock3r' post='1205048' date='Feb 26 2007, 07:57 PM']I was wondering what people's thoughts were on self-flagellation (causing pain to oneself, usually through lashes). Unable to break the hold of sin (mainly masturbation), it has recently held a certain appeal to me, a way to show God I'm really sorry. Your thoughts?[/quote]

Concerning this struggle, I got a tip from an ex-seminarian which worked for me.

Mainly, personal sexual sin is a symptom of a problem, more than it is a problem in and of itself.


I have been 'clean' for 8 months now.


Another guy I know found success in setting up punishments, such as having to eat a bowl of some vegitable he did not like.

[Theoketos]

Having been free from this problem for 4 years (after 8 years of addiction) I can say that self flaggelation would make the problem worse, because it would make your flesh weaker at this point. Root out the cause and the symptom will follow. Go to confession immediately when you fall.

[Theologian in Training]

Having dealt with those who have suffered from this, one of my recommendations is a form of mortification, but not to the extreme of self-flagellation. Usually, if they are healthy enough, I suggest that they take a day to fast. The reason I suggest this is because it reminds our bodies that we are not just body, but body and soul, and sometimes the body refuses to be subservient to the soul. In fact, Josemaria Escriva says: "One has to give the body a little less than its due. Otherwise it turns traitor." Usually, from what I have seen, their bodies have indeed "betrayed" them and, to quote St. Paul, "we do the things we don't want to do."

I think fasting is a very healthy and, if you are able, better way to learn self-control, because it deals with the core appetite, hunger. However, since we cannot feed ourselves physically, we learn to feed ourselves spiritually, and it is that spiritual sustenance that helps us keep our bodies in check. For, you realize that most of these people that suffer from this affliction, cannot pray, or if they do, it varies from being serious or being superficial, the struggle is genuine, the fight is real, but their appetite is strong and before they can pray, truly pray, they need to curb that appetite. It serves a two-fold purpose, it allows them to remember their spiritual hunger, but it also gives the "body little less than its due," so it is always obedient to the spirit, of which it is to serve.

So, depending on the stage that you are at, I would highly recommend fasting as one of the many mortifications you choose to practice. However, I don't know that self-flagellation will necessarily help you if it has no connection to why you are doing it in the first place. Granted, we want to physically remind ourselves of the pain and agony Christ endured for our sins, however, He gives us enough opportunities to mortify ourselves if we are attentive and ready to accept them as that. We mortify ourselves everytime we decide not to give into temptation, we mortify ourselves by doing things we don't want to do, we mortify ourselves by not taking that dessert we really want. There are countless other ways to mortify ourselves than strictly beating ourselves with a whip.

Just something you might want to think about before taking to such extreme measures.

Just my .02

God Bless

Fr. Brian

[faithfulrock3r]

thanks for the imput. Two things are aiding me rite now in my battle, Lent and praying the rosary daily. It's working well so far (and no flagellation either).

[MissyP89]

I hope no one minds me bringing this back from the dead. *spooky music*

A brief history about me:
1) I come from a nominal Catholic family--nominal being the keyword here.
2) I've recently returned to the Church after a secular life and a few years in the occult.
3) I struggle with the same sins mentioned by the OP...aaaand
4) If it's important, I'll be 18 in November.

It came up in conversation with a friend of mine about what I do when I fall (besides confess, of course). Well, I didn't really give it much thought, but for some time now, even before I returned to the Church, I would pray with my feet resting on my metal bed frame. After a while, my feet would begin to ache and sting from the frame digging into them (it doesn't cut or bleed, but it does leave marks).

After my return, I continued doing this while adding prayers like, "Let this remind me of Your suffering that I've willfully ignored through my sin." I think it hit me tonight that what I'm doing is a mild form of corporal mortification.

Wait. Stop. Hold everything.

...I feel a little bit over my head here. I didn't really think much of this until I talked to my friend, but suddenly I'm not so sure this is the right thing for me to be doing. I think it hit me tonight that what I'm doing is a mild form of corporal mortification.

Like I said, I come from a secular family. I've had friends in the past who struggled with cutting themselves and other kinds of self-mutilation; naturally, because of those experiences I've wound up with the firm belief that hurting yourself on purpose is very, very wrong. So I'm feeling confused and a little perturbed.

I don't want to talk to my confessor about it. I didn't want this to be a Big Deal. I think, like Fr. Brian said, there are other things I could be doing as penance, given my age and situation. Physical pain isn't something to mess around with, you know?

Talk to me, please. I think I accidentally went straight into the deep end of the pool. I can;t swim, either. Fr. Brian (or heck, any clergy/religious), your input would be much appreciated, too.

Thanks, pham!
Pax Christi,
Melissa

[93 Phillies]

I don't think it would be wise to hurt your body like that even to take your mind off of something you believe is worse.

[adt6247]

[quote name='MissyP89' post='1321528' date='Jul 9 2007, 10:37 PM']Like I said, I come from a secular family. I've had friends in the past who struggled with cutting themselves and other kinds of self-mutilation; naturally, because of those experiences I've wound up with the firm belief that hurting yourself on purpose is very, very wrong. So I'm feeling confused and a little perturbed.

I don't want to talk to my confessor about it. I didn't want this to be a Big Deal. I think, like Fr. Brian said, there are other things I could be doing as penance, given my age and situation. Physical pain isn't something to mess around with, you know?[/quote]
You absolutely should talk to your confessor about it. Not necessarily confess it, but you should mention it.

Corporal mortification is not, by any means, wrong. Willfully accepting suffering, whether fasting, putting a pebble in one's shoe, or something as extreme as St. Rose of Lima did (who did things like sleep on piles of broken glass) can be very holy things. However, someone in your state should not attempt anything more extreme than fasting unless you have serious spiritual direction in doing so. It's too easy to get involved with mortification for the wrong reasons, particularly when involved with sexual sin.

We're in an age where sexuality is so very, very distorted, and few in this world have a view of sexuality is inline with God's plan, even within marriage. I urge you to take refuge in Mary, and find the direction of a good priest or religious.

[Laudate_Dominum]

[quote name='faithfulrock3r' post='1205048' date='Feb 26 2007, 08:57 PM']I was wondering what people's thoughts were on self-flagellation (causing pain to oneself, usually through lashes). Unable to break the hold of sin (mainly masturbation), it has recently held a certain appeal to me, a way to show God I'm really sorry. Your thoughts?[/quote]
The way I quit that during my conversion process was by taking my belt to my back—in a spirit of compunction and supplication of course. Considering the fruits this practice had in my own life I can't exactly bash it, but I don't know that it is for everyone. There are people who have self-destructive tendencies (like cutting and stuff) and I don't think problems of this sort would be altogether compatible with this kind of penance.

The first book I read when I wanted to learn how to be Catholic was The Dialogue of Saint Catherine of Siena and she was majorly into corporal penances. I felt like a loser when I read her stuff. One of the most valuable things that I learned from her though was that whenever we put before our sight our utter sinfulness and wretchedness we must at the same time recall the Blood of Christ and have our Crucified Lord as the center of our attention. If penance is not Christ centered it is probably self-centered in some way.

I'm not saying that this stuff is right for you, I have no idea, but I don't think it is without merit. The fact that you have doubts may suggest that it isn't right. The confessor advice given by others is of course essential.