I Have A Calling...but...

[elizabeth_jane]

I have felt a calling to be a sister since my senior year of college (2003). I'm 25 now (26 in April), and have fallen in love with the Nashville Dominicans. I have contacted their vocations director about attending their January vocations retreat.

Here's the "but" part. I had a lung transplant more than two years ago, and I'm fine now. I have no physical restrictions, I can do basically whatever I want (except climb Mt. Everest, but I don't want to do that anyway!). The schedule the Nashville Dominicans keep is very close to what I keep now (except I get up at 6, not 5). I have a full-time job, and am very active in my parish community. I know I would be able to be a teacher and put up with the demands of life.

The vocations direction seemed to have concerns about: 1) whether I could keep up with the life physically (Like if I was physically active, etc.) and 2) about my medical regiment. I will be on certain drugs the rest of my life. Some are probably negotiable, but some are not.

So, I [i]know/i] I have a calling. I have never felt more strongly about anything. I have spent much time in prayer and discernment. I cannot imagine not doing this. And yet I don't know if I'll be given the chance to try it.

Has anyone else had this problem? Or has advice? Or anything? I know that God's will and timing are perfect but I cannot imagine not being able to at least [i]try/i] the life...

[alicemary]

You are doing just what you need to be doing at this point in your life. You are building up your spiritual life, exploring different Orders and visiting them. And how wonderful that you have made such a good recovery and are feeling so well. God is indeed good.
You might have to do some exploring to find a community that would be accepting of your medical history. It is just a sad fact that some may have concerns over your health. And you need to be on those meds for the rest of your life, which may be an obstacle.
Keep your heart open and place your trust in the Lord to guide you where you belong. If you are meant to enter the convent, the Lord will find the way and the place.
Seems like you have been upfront with the Dominicans, and this you need to be. No use holding back and having your heart broken. If they have a problem with your health, then you just pick yourself up and go searching some more. The Lord will never leave you.
My prayers join yours

[Starets]

Some communities are anxiouys about accepting people wiht physical handicaps. There is the question of how well the community will be able to adapt to it. I used to be blind. I was turned down by one community because they were a small community and did not think they could adapt to having me around. So they referred me to another community, which I will be joining in 119 days, 10 hours, 28 miutes. Not that I am counting down or anything.

There is a phatmasser here who is the vocations director for her Dominican community. She is wise and will answer your question well when she sees it.

[VeniteAdoremus]

The thing that's painful here is that a call is considered a call when it comes both to you and to the community you're entering. So you're called to a community, and the community is called to you. When it isn't - the calling you feel is probably directed somewhere else. And if you feel very strongly that it should be THIS community and not another... well, I know a little bit about how you feel.

I can also imagine that it isn't very nice to have someone who doesn't as yet know you as well as you do yourself deciding about whether you'll be able to do something - especially if you disagree! But if you try to trust in God (and Sr. ME ), and keep talking openly and honestly with her, you can make this whole process turn out good no matter what the outcome.

(If this sounds overly negative: know that I'm [i]so[/i] rooting for you!)

[elizabeth_jane]

[quote name='Staretz' post='1425892' date='Nov 27 2007, 08:17 PM']Some communities are anxiouys about accepting people wiht physical handicaps. There is the question of how well the community will be able to adapt to it. I used to be blind. I was turned down by one community because they were a small community and did not think they could adapt to having me around. So they referred me to another community, which I will be joining in 119 days, 10 hours, 28 miutes. Not that I am counting down or anything.

There is a phatmasser here who is the vocations director for her Dominican community. She is wise and will answer your question well when she sees it.[/quote]

Thank you so much for this post--it's very encouraging!
I hope that they can recommend me to another order if they decide that it won't work.

[Sister Rose Therese]

Communities do have to be careful about matters of health sometimes.
Part of the vocation director's hesitance could be because your case is unusual.
I am pretty confident in saying that before out and out denying you on the basis of health, they would meet you and see how you handled their regimen, and also consult a doctor about it.

[Jennifer]

I hope that everything works out for you. God Bless you.

[cathoholic_anonymous]

[quote name='VeniteAdoremus' post='1425894' date='Nov 28 2007, 01:19 AM']The thing that's painful here is that a call is considered a call when it comes both to you and to the community you're entering. So you're called to a community, and the community is called to you. When it isn't - the calling you feel is probably directed somewhere else. And if you feel very strongly that it should be THIS community and not another... well, I know a little bit about how you feel.

I can also imagine that it isn't very nice to have someone who doesn't as yet know you as well as you do yourself deciding about whether you'll be able to do something - especially if you disagree! But if you try to trust in God (and Sr. ME ), and keep talking openly and honestly with her, you can make this whole process turn out good no matter what the outcome.

(If this sounds overly negative: know that I'm [i]so[/i] rooting for you!)[/quote]

Amen, VA.

Elizabeth Jane, I understand your perspective - I've felt called to be a sister from the age of eleven and I have disabilities that will never go away (autism and unusually severe dyspraxia). Two communities expressed their doubts about my suitability for the life after looking at the information on dyspraxia and autistic spectrum disorders that I sent to them. It hurt.

Then I came across a Carmelite monastery who invited me for a live-in. The prioress talked to me about my disabilities and said that the community would have to give them serious thought, but after my stay was over she told me that they need not be a problem. If a community accepts you in spite of your medical needs it is probably a good sign that this community is yours.

[elizabeth_jane]

[quote name='Cathoholic Anonymous' post='1426179' date='Nov 28 2007, 09:24 AM']Amen, VA.

Elizabeth Jane, I understand your perspective - I've felt called to be a sister from the age of eleven and I have disabilities that will never go away (autism and unusually severe dyspraxia). Two communities expressed their doubts about my suitability for the life after looking at the information on dyspraxia and autistic spectrum disorders that I sent to them. It hurt.

Then I came across a Carmelite monastery who invited me for a live-in. The prioress talked to me about my disabilities and said that the community would have to give them serious thought, but after my stay was over she told me that they need not be a problem. If a community accepts you in spite of your medical needs it is probably a good sign that this community is yours.[/quote]

Thank you, CA--posts like this make me feel so much better. For a long time I had thought that no one would take me, since so many put an (understandable) emphasis on your health. Where is your community?

[EJames2]

Go for it!
i say that from experience, and just be very open and honest with you, them, God..
i leave you with theses 2 inspirational videos!
pax!
the first one youll recognize!
[url="http://www.lovetobecatholic.com/video_569_The_Dominican_Sisters_of_SaintCecilia_-Nashville.html"]http://www.lovetobecatholic.com/video_569_...-Nashville.html[/url]
-
[url="http://www.lovetobecatholic.com/video_500_Take_up_your_Cross_daily...tolat_crucem_suam_coti.html"]http://www.lovetobecatholic.com/video_500_..._suam_coti.html[/url]
-
Pax

[MC IMaGiNaZUN]

we took in a guy, in his old age some years back, it was somewhat of a mistake. he ended up being more in convalescence. he was active as a layperson in one of our parishes for years, and it wouldnt have seemed like a problem at the time. But this should be a legitimate concern for any religious order.
I think these concerns they have for you are just average and unalarming. I would keep going with them. Especially since you are young.
Also pray to St. Bernadette, one of her major crosses,was that she never believed she would be allowed to final profession in the convent because of her own poor health. Gosh St. Bernadette i just love her i can't go on without looking for an excuse to talk about her.
Jesus Loves You
SHALOM
Br. Mark Menegatti OSA

Edited November 30, 2007 by MC IMaGiNaZUN

[elizabeth_jane]

Totally forgot about Bernadette, and she's my mom's patron saint! Yikes!

[Mari Therese]

God will triumph! If it is His will that you be a Sister then He is going to hook you up with the community that he wants you to be. It's a matter of the patience game...

Prayers and Blessings!

[Ave Maria Totus Tuus]

[quote name='Mari Therese' post='1427427' date='Nov 30 2007, 05:24 PM']God will triumph! If it is His will that you be a Sister then He is going to hook you up with the community that he wants you to be. It's a matter of the patience game...

Prayers and Blessings![/quote]


Ah yes, the patience game! One I'm sure that many of us are familiar with.

But God is good, is He not??

[Saint_Gemma_Galgani]

Ask for the prayers of St. Gemma Galgani. All of the orders that she asked to join rejected ger because of her ill health.

[DesiringMore]

Are you attracted to children?? is that what draws you to the Dominicans??? Know of my prayers....but there are many orders out there...don't let your door be closed if the Dominicans close a window....it only opens another door of possibilities....once again, know of my prayers!!!

F.L.S.(future little sister)
www.littlesistersofthepoor.org

[elizabeth_jane]

[quote name='DesiringMore' post='1427896' date='Dec 1 2007, 09:38 PM']Are you attracted to children?? is that what draws you to the Dominicans??? Know of my prayers....but there are many orders out there...don't let your door be closed if the Dominicans close a window....it only opens another door of possibilities....once again, know of my prayers!!!

F.L.S.(future little sister)
www.littlesistersofthepoor.org[/quote]
I love kids--I have twenty three cousins so I've grown up around them, and I was originally an education major in college. I can't have kids of my own so yes, I am really drawn to any order that works with kids, but I also considered contemplative orders like the Benedictines.

What drew me to the Dominicans was the palpable joy I saw in their work and vocation. Also it seemed better suited for my current situation in life. I am, though, open to other orders. ...

(anything with music as a major ministry is also a huge plus!)

[phivan]

[quote name='elizabeth_jane' post='1425857' date='Nov 27 2007, 06:20 PM']I have felt a calling to be a sister since my senior year of college (2003). I'm 25 now (26 in April), and have fallen in love with the Nashville Dominicans. I have contacted their vocations director about attending their January vocations retreat.

Here's the "but" part. I had a lung transplant more than two years ago, and I'm fine now. I have no physical restrictions, I can do basically whatever I want (except climb Mt. Everest, but I don't want to do that anyway!). The schedule the Nashville Dominicans keep is very close to what I keep now (except I get up at 6, not 5). I have a full-time job, and am very active in my parish community. I know I would be able to be a teacher and put up with the demands of life.

The vocations direction seemed to have concerns about: 1) whether I could keep up with the life physically (Like if I was physically active, etc.) and 2) about my medical regiment. I will be on certain drugs the rest of my life. Some are probably negotiable, but some are not.

So, I [i]know/i] I have a calling. I have never felt more strongly about anything. I have spent much time in prayer and discernment. I cannot imagine not doing this. And yet I don't know if I'll be given the chance to try it.

Has anyone else had this problem? Or has advice? Or anything? I know that God's will and timing are perfect but I cannot imagine not being able to at least [i]try/i] the life...[/quote]

Elizabeth Jane--thanks for your post, your sentiments and your honesty. I admire your courage to hold on to your religious calling even though you don't know if you would be given the chance to try it.

You're probably pretty disappointed with the vocation director these days or with Jesus too...but just so you know, I'm praying for you in a special way. I still very much believe that Jesus has a plan for you... He has a way of throwing in these very unexpected twists, and He asks for some really hard things sometimes. (I spoke from my own painful experiences not too long ago.) Perhaps, Jesus has something for you that He couldn't have given you otherwise??? I don't know...

I hope this Advent Season will be a time of Christ's gentle light breaking through more of the darkness in unexpected ways.

Quiet joy!

[corban711]

If you really love the Dominicans and for some reason it just wasn't meant to be...you could try checking out the Community of St. John which has both Contemplative and Active sisters. Their founder was a Dominican. In some respects, they are similar.

However, I do agree with the other posters on here. Pray, be open and honest with them and see where God takes you! He will always give you what is best for you and is leading you to Him through everything. Be patient, remember not to lose sight of belonging to Him now (not just as a future spouse in a convent). "Abide in me and I in you" He loves you dearly. He will take you exactly where He wants you!

[jkaands]

[quote name='elizabeth_jane' post='1427925' date='Dec 1 2007, 08:21 PM']I love kids--I have twenty three cousins so I've grown up around them, and I was originally an education major in college. I can't have kids of my own so yes, I am really drawn to any order that works with kids, but I also considered contemplative orders like the Benedictines.

What drew me to the Dominicans was the palpable joy I saw in their work and vocation. Also it seemed better suited for my current situation in life. I am, though, open to other orders. ...

(anything with music as a major ministry is also a huge plus!)

The Benedictine monasteries in the US need vocations and would definitely consider you. Benedictines traditionally have a strong orientation towards teaching and professional development. If you view the websites which profile their members, you'll notice that many of them teach at all levels.

Check out:

[url="http://www.benedictine-srs-vocations.org/index.html"]http://www.benedictine-srs-vocations.org/index.html[/url]

And there are many other Dominican orders in the US which are active and might consider you, in which the sisters pursue various apostolates, including teaching:

Check out:

[url="http://www.op.org/international/english/Links/categories/sisters.htm"]http://www.op.org/international/english/Li...ies/sisters.htm[/url][/quote]