Opposite Sex Housemates

[Basilisa Marie]

Because saying things louder always makes them clearer, and does a better job of convincing others that you're right.

Unless I'm totally mistaken and huge, bold font [i]isn't [/i] the internet equivalent of yelling.

Edited April 15, 2012 by Basilisa Marie

[Lil Red]

also, tl;dr.

[Vincent Vega]

[quote name='Lil Red' timestamp='1334514645' post='2418225']
oh poo. i'm totally hell-bound then!
[/quote]
Me too.

[Jesus_lol]

yeah that hurt to read, try again in a normal person voice.

[Lil Red]

[quote name='USAirwaysIHS' timestamp='1334523699' post='2418271']
Me too.
[/quote]

[BG45]

[quote name='Amppax' timestamp='1334519637' post='2418253']
A couple points/questions/additions:

1. I'm assuming most people don't view this living arrangement as a first choice, correct? That seems to be the consensus that I see.

2. Are we talking about just a guy and girl living together, or are we talking about multiple guys and/or multiple girls? Because, for me, that changes things quite a lot.

3. As a late teen guy (O MY GOSH I'M 20!?!?!?! I feel old.), I understand what FP is saying. Temptation is a powerful thing, and that is situation is certainly not devoid of temptation. However I can see a certain blame (note i'm [b]not[/b] accusing you of this, but this is something that I myself did when I had this mindset) that is being placed on others. The thought I'm seeing is that "YOU are tempting ME" and blaming the other person. Instead, a more mature response is to be cautious, know your limits, and, above all pray and frequent the sacraments. This obviously goes for everyone, guys and girls. Now obviously, I'm not saying "don't worry about avoiding temptation", avoiding temptation is a big part of the overall strategy. But its not the only part.
[/quote]

This entire post. This.

A few years ago I went to conference. (Missy may recall it being when I called at 1am in the morning going "I think we may be homeless". Jason may remember it as the cops flashing their lights at us after we left the steakhouse.) We were three thousand miles from home, the hotel lost our reservations despite our confirmation number. We only had two rooms instead of three...and decided we were too tired from traveling and we would fight the good fight in the morning since we had managed to at least get that out of them for the night.

I ended up spending the night, as the only guy there at that point, alone with two women in a hotel room. I slept on the floor. I never had any "urges" and I never looked at the two of them in a sexual way. We were all so comfortable with one another, that none of us ever even considered it could be viewed in a negative light. None of us viewed it as a temptation. No one else viewed it scandalously either, the general mood from what everyone was telling the people who came later after we fought to get our third room was, "Yeah, Phil had to sleep on D. and K.'s floor and didn't complain about it."

Would people have viewed it differently if it wasn't a group, only one woman and I? I would hope not. I've personally found that like many in this thread have said, secular culture is far less likely to assume horrible things morally than Catholics (and other Christians) are. One friend felt the sting of this before her wedding when her fiancee's apartment unexpectedly needed fumigated and he had nowhere to turn but hers, and they had to fight this full on offensive launched by their friends who were Christians and assuming the worst, whereas their secular friends went "Oh. D. has to stay at your place while his apartment infestation is killed? Hope he doesn't snore, it would be a bad time to find that out right before your wedding."

[MissyP89]

[quote name='USAirwaysIHS' timestamp='1334523699' post='2418271']
Me too.
[/quote]

Honey, you were going to hell [i]long[/i] before this thread happened.

[Amppax]

[quote name='USAirwaysIHS' timestamp='1334523699' post='2418271']
Me too.
[/quote]

[img]http://cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/18653071.jpg[/img]

[r2Dtoo]

[quote name='Amppax' timestamp='1334529014' post='2418307']
[img]http://cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/18653071.jpg[/img]
[/quote]
respeck

[r2Dtoo]

[quote name='dominicansoul' timestamp='1334521573' post='2418259'][size=3][b]Oh, and Winnie, in those cultures where nudity is the norm, even then, the priests make the women cover their breasts at Mass, and the men must cover their privates... in the convent, I knew a Bishop who visited and he served in a very remote island... he showed us a video of the Mass there, and everyone was covered (this bishop made it mandatory during the Mass.) I guess he crapped in his pantaloons, and that's why he made them cover up? or maybe, anomaly, the priest is twisted for thinking they should be covered during Holy mass?? iono, if I go by some of the counter-arguments on this board, I'm the most twisted, old-fashioned, impure dirty thinker, gossipy individual ever because I worry about the sin of scandal... [/b][/size][/quote]
In all fairness though, this could have been because the Bishop just didn't want to be distracted with all these naked people running around. It would have looked bad on the Church if he suddenly busted out laughing.

Edited April 15, 2012 by r2Dtoo

[Vincent Vega]

[quote name='MissyP89' timestamp='1334528723' post='2418303']
Honey, you were going to hell [i]long[/i] before this thread happened.
[/quote]
This just adds insult to a very fabulous injury.

Edited April 15, 2012 by USAirwaysIHS

[Tab'le De'Bah-Rye]

What about shared bathrooms when undies get left on the ground and people walk in or whatever. Locks on bathrooms or get a house with two, one bathroom for boys and one for girls. It would cause me scandal even with seperate bathrooms coz i'm helplessly stupid with women, or possibly women are helplessly stupid with me,either way it's a no go redzone for me.

[PhuturePriest]

[quote name='Anomaly' timestamp='1334510272' post='2418189']
Miles,
You just need to ratchet down how right your opinions may be when you post them, and not get your feelings hurt when it seems to ruffle feathers. You're generally not far off in what you're saying, it's how you say it and how you overly defend when challenged. It's not easy to communicate with nuance on the innerwebz.
Misunderstandings may be problematic, but if handled with a dash of humility and charity, it can keep the convo going. Most of the posters are 20% to 350% older and more experienced than you and haven't gotten perfect at it. Tone down the extremism of your opinion a notch, or give a validated scientific reference men have stronger urges.
[/quote]

I wasn't offended or hurt in the slightest, and I certainly wasn't angry or had any sort of tone. I was simply explaining my position. I'm not sure how people want me to type. Nowhere else do people mistake me or think I am angry when I am not except here.

[Tab'le De'Bah-Rye]

liberal cats are stronger than conservatives possibly, conservative cats have less control over there desires and passions possibly and liberal cats do. What i have said is not a free rain to sleep witha coke bottle full of liquor in your bed while you are sleeping coz that would be more tempting fate than liberal cat. Both are acceptable to me and neither greater or lesser the conservative is open to the grace that he or she can't live in a shared house which is also a great virtue

Edited April 16, 2012 by Tab'le Du'Bah-Rye

[PhuturePriest]

[quote name='Amppax' timestamp='1334519637' post='2418253']
A couple points/questions/additions:

1. I'm assuming most people don't view this living arrangement as a first choice, correct? That seems to be the consensus that I see.

2. Are we talking about just a guy and girl living together, or are we talking about multiple guys and/or multiple girls? Because, for me, that changes things quite a lot.

3. As a late teen guy (O MY GOSH I'M 20!?!?!?! I feel old.), I understand what FP is saying. Temptation is a powerful thing, and that is situation is certainly not devoid of temptation. However I can see a certain blame (note i'm [b]not[/b] accusing you of this, but this is something that I myself did when I had this mindset) that is being placed on others. The thought I'm seeing is that "YOU are tempting ME" and blaming the other person. Instead, a more mature response is to be cautious, know your limits, and, above all pray and frequent the sacraments. This obviously goes for everyone, guys and girls. Now obviously, I'm not saying "don't worry about avoiding temptation", avoiding temptation is a big part of the overall strategy. But its not the only part.
[/quote]

Of course. I'm not saying that vile women should wrap themselves up in a blanket because they're tempting us. I'm saying they shouldn't downplay where men are at sexually when they are your age and my age and not to be so naive as to think all we dream about is rainbows and ponies (And that comment is NOT supposed to say that this is what women dream about). Men literally wake up in the morning revved up and ready to go. I'm not saying that we will rape the next girl we see, but romantic feelings can grow and with romantic feelings lustful feelings come with it. Lust is natural and is in fact a gift from God, but like all gifts from God it can be distorted, and in our society we are trained to distort it. The sad thing about lust is it is highly tempting for everybody, not just men, and all a woman needs to do is let go of one simple boundary she had between her "housemate" and before she knows it it can have a domino effect. I do not hate women nor do I think they should be wrapped up like a mummy. In fact, because I love women I want to warn them that we men aren't so charming and pure as we can sometimes seem. A woman's purity and virginity is a gift only for her husband, and she should have full guard on it at all times because it is so special.

Edited April 16, 2012 by FuturePriest387