Best Vocation Advice Ever

[AccountDeleted]

I'm not sure how I feel about this quote because I go through a lot when I'm trying to discern. But I do understand part of it because there is a refreshment of soul that happens in a monastery that I don't get anywhere else. The funny thing is that I love the Divine Office so much now and yet before I first entered Carmel, I had no idea how to pray it, and it really didn't seem to be as important to me as mental prayer. I think we just have to allow ourselves time and space to grow into our spirituality and not try to fix everything up tight in little boxes in order to try to control our experiences. The differences between Carmelite and Benedictine spirituality for example, are always revealing themselves to me in little ways every day and I am constantly assessing what I understand. Then I think about Aquinas, a brilliant theologian who wrote so much, and yet at the very end he himself declared it all the be 'as straw'. Being thinking and rational creatures, we want to understand, but there is always going to be a lot that we just can't comprehend and have to accept. That might be what causes some of the conflicts within us, whether we are discerning religious life or another vocation. There's just too much to know and understand it all, and sometimes our feelings get a little bashed around too.

The 'trick' for me now is to be kind to myself, and patient. Some days I wonder if I am making a mistake (and have a million different reasons why this might be so) but I just ignore all these little doubts, and before you know it, I find myself wondering where those doubts ever came from. We aren't just fighting ourselves sometimes.... I mean, I'm just saying.

Edited April 19, 2012 by nunsense

[marigold]

[quote name='SoonerCatholic' timestamp='1334852992' post='2420640']
This quote reminds me of an a comment I made to the vocation director during my live in with their Carmelite community. We had just finish hosting a Mass and dinner for a group of international seminarians from a near by seminary and we were all quite exhausted. We had about an hours rest before Vespers and we followed the normal schedule for the rest of the evening. Later I told the vd that although I was tired enough to go straight to bed for the rest of the day, slipping into the regular schedule actually felt quite refreshing. She said that was a good sign! It is part of the reason I hope to enter that community.
[/quote]

Yes, absolutely. There was one feast day we didn't have a priest and went to a parish for Liturgy. It was lovely, but what felt really good and natural was coming home to vespers and the evening milking round.

[SoonerCatholic]

[quote name='Lisa' timestamp='1334853103' post='2420642']
Hey SoonerCatholic! It's been a while since you've been on! How is everything?


sorry!
[/quote]
Everything's is going well. Just waiting to hear about my acceptance to Carmel. I have been on before but mostly I lurk, I think fondly of all the people on here even if I don't say much. I was absent in February because I was making my live in then. But more about that for another thread.

[LaboureSociety]

It's important to distinguish the feelings in an experience as well. For example, many people feel really good doing physical work and being outdoors -it's natural, the adrenaline is pumping! However, if one unknowingly infers or weighs too heavily from those feelings that they are called to a Benedictine monastery, that would be premature! On the other hand, if they realize that they enjoy that along with peace and joy in a variety of other areas of a healthy life all together, now, we're talking.

Or, if one has a difficult home life -unsupportive or emotionally distant parents lets say- and they find at the convent they are surrounded by communicative, supportive individuals, one may feel exhilhilarated! However, this is a natural human response, not an indication of a vocation in and of itself.

So, again, it's important to know ourselves, know our families and circumstances (this can be hard when we are young), to acknowledge our feelings and to sort through the true sources -are we running from something or to something e.g. Feelings can be great indicators, but we have to sort through them to make good long-term decisions based on truth.

Finally, consider starting a notebook. Write down what you think and how you feel about your life in general (goals, desires, fears, relationship with God, family, and friends, what is important to you) and your experiences with communities. Ask yourself how or why you feel those ways and if they are based in good, sustainable, healthy motivations (not fear, guilt, etc) -be proactive about things you can change. This might help you to realize where you are really at in discernment and to be much happier and healthier whichever vocation you choose.