Feeling Stressed

[OnlySunshine]

[quote name='somethingfishy' timestamp='1338880903' post='2441116']
I think you're right. I spent a few years thinking I was being a great discerner, looking at zillions of websites, visiting all sorts of convents, going on every discernment/vocations talk or retreat I could find... Then I took a year off because I got sick of it all, and that's when the community to which I'm currently applying sort of fell into my lap. Which maybe was God's way of saying, "be less of a control freak with your life, dear."

Anyway, to the OP (original poster not Dominican), I think you've been given a lot of good advice. Any religious community can be a road to holiness, as long as the community is in submission to the authority of the Church and is faithfully following its charism. You don't have to make a decision now; you will have to make a decision at some point. Perhaps it would be helpful to read a book on Ignatian discernment of spirits? I read and liked [url="http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/10355144-how-to-listen-when-god-is-speaking"]this one[/url], by Fr Mitch Pacwa.

Finally, as an accomplished worrier, I highly recommend not worrying.
[/quote]

Heh, that's how it worked with me, too. I'm a well-known internet researcher in my family and friends and I became obsessed with searching for the right order for me. I had a list of what I wanted in my mind and would totally discount any order that didn't meet my standards. Also, I became stressed because searching for an order that was open to those with medication needs was a nightmare. Almost every time (except for 3 occasions), I was turned away because of my medical needs. Of those 3 orders that would accept, they were all the wrong fit.

So, the last order I visited, which I thought was the one, had requirements that I couldn't fulfill so I decided that I would end my discernment. I was not having any luck with my search. Well, when I surrendered, that's when God stepped in and took action. That's when the order I am discerning with now "fell into my lap." Now, it's just basically a waiting game, but I don't feel the need to look around anymore. I still visit IRL and CMSWR when I am helping others and to look at the news feed, but that's it. It's funny -- the one thing I was totally sure I wasn't called to look into is the one thing that this order specializes in -- missionary work.