Discontentment

[Gabriela]

I don't want to say which community yet, feel like I'd need Mother's ok but I will tell you it is a Poor Clare Collettine monastery and it's not Roswell--though I'm loving and laughing my way through "A Right to be Merry" these days.  It's like the "happily ever after" of my cinerellas story.

 

Prayers for you my Sister.

 

If it's Barhamsville, do me a favor and tell Mother that her friend at Virginia Tech says hi, and that the thesis is almost done. :-)

[MarysLittleFlower]

I was on a retreat at a convent this weekend, and transitioning back to life at college has been difficult. I know my sense of discontentment is more acute because I was just at the convent, but to a lesser degree, that's how I feel about being in school constantly. I mean, it's enjoyable enough, and I don't mean to complain. I know God meant for me to have this year at this school, and I've grown and learned a lot. I just don't know what to do with this feeling of discontentment. Does anyone else feel this way or have any thoughts?

I can relate to this. When I was a student, I began thinking about religious life. I think it was mostly the prayer, being around the Blessed Sacrament so much, the vows, etc... I know that there are crosses in religious life, but it IS beautiful, and especially with the crosses, perhaps. Maybe at times I did forget that and idealize it. But there is so much there that is helpful to our souls. Meanwhile, I was surrounded by homework, the media, popular music, fashion, etc... and it was all just weary to me and seemed meaningless. Even the studies didn't seem to be all that relevant to anything because what i studied had no relation to what I was thinking about.

 

I think that this sort of discontent with the world, isn't a bad thing.. i mean, we are in exile. The world is not our home... and we won't feel at home here. And if we'd rather go to an Adoration chapel than be surrounded by malls/loud music/pop culture, that is imo a good thing too.

 

However, I think now that we should also grow in holiness where we are at the moment... this could mean, accepting this cross of being in exile. It's also doing our duties right now. So studying is like a duty, that we have to do. We shouldl do everything well... that's something I wish I remembered more back then, when I was in school. However, - if you feel like you need to leave college/university and go to a convent, that is different.

 

I think maybe a good attitude for those who believe they should finish their schooling first - is to accept the cross of feeling this way, maybe find joy in it because you're actually longing to be closer to God, and to do all your school work well, but use the rest of the time for prayer. :) This is just my point of view! I'm finding something similar now, living in the world, and working... even though I'm not in school, I'm faced with the same situation.