Balance - Is it a thing?

[Kia ora]

There's also something about social media that encourages our worst tendencies. How many bar tabs do I have open at the moment? Why can't I just concentrate on one? Isn't this flitting about from one to another, keeping the possibilities open, the direct opposite of what prayer is? Prayer, isn't that the most pure form of attention, to paraphrase Simone Weil?

[franciscanheart]

I left Facebook and haven't looked back.  Those who I want to keep in touch with I still do via e-mail, text, phone calls, and good old fashioned face to face get-togethers.  I haven't written a letter yet but I plan on doing so to a friend of mine in the seminary.  

For me, leaving Facebook was a positive change in my life and I'm happy for it.  Now it's time to work on throwing away my t.v. and continuing on from there! 

​I don't have a television, but I do use Facebook. I don't know that I'll ever get rid of it completely, but I think it's amesome that you did.

​If I give you a like, don't get any feeling of satisfaction from it! It'll only feed into the unhealthy posting-for-approval malaise

I was thinking that becoming a friend is process of unknowing. I met someone the other day and when we become facebook friends, I had access to years of her photos, her statuses, her likes and dislikes etc. Do I need to know this? I know more about someone who I met relatively briefly than someone I've known for ages. What would it be like to unknow a person, as time goes by, for that person to remain more and more a mystery to me?

​I really dislike the mystery Facebook takes away. I'm always disappointed to learn that a friend has "Facebook-stalked" their new love interest; I feel they rob themselves when they do that. Mystery is half the fun.

[AccountDeleted]

​I don't have a television, but I do use Facebook. I don't know that I'll ever get rid of it completely, but I think it's amesome that you did.

​I really dislike the mystery Facebook takes away. I'm always disappointed to learn that a friend has "Facebook-stalked" their new love interest; I feel they rob themselves when they do that. Mystery is half the fun.

​Well, I gave up my television set years ago but I do watch programs online - mainly movies and news but I do watch the occasional TV show on network TV if they have it on their website. I gave up Facebook about 7 years ago and haven't missed it since. My family is scattered around the globe but we got around the contact problem by setting up our own family website where we can post stories, family news, recipes, photos, videos etc. We also rely on email a lot. I just don't like FB - never really have, although I know some people really lov eit.

[IcePrincessKRS]

So you might not be missing out on MUCH but since most people in my generation use it as their primary social tool (well maybe it's secondary to texting I don't know), you really fall off the face of the earth if you don't use social media.

​I've considered deleting my facebook account off and on but this is one of the primary reasons I keep it around. As I noted in my other post I only have about 200 friends, and most of them are family--family that we get to see once or twice a year, at best. Facebook/instagram/google+ fills the gap and allows easy communication and updates with the people that I care about. My mother and mother in law may only get to see my children a couple of times each year but they can log on facebook and see photos and stories of all their shenanigans whenever they want. I can share a whole album of vacation pictures on facebook much easier than I can via email. We tried the family website thing with my husband's side of the family and it never flourished. In the end I just can't convince myself to completely cut out facebook and other social media.

[HopefulHeart]

I have never joined Facebook specifically because I think it would have a negative impact on my personal outlook and productivity. I feel it would be a major distraction and would invite me to make unhealthy comparisons with other people. I think I am at a good balance with my current means of social communication (texting, email, face-to-face chats, etc.). Someday that balance might shift to include Facebook, but I am happy with where I am for now.  (Note that I am not trying to disparage fb or those who use it. I just don't think it would be a good choice for me at the present.)

[franciscanheart]

I have never joined Facebook specifically because I think it would have a negative impact on my personal outlook and productivity. I feel it would be a major distraction and would invite me to make unhealthy comparisons with other people. I think I am at a good balance with my current means of social communication (texting, email, face-to-face chats, etc.). Someday that balance might shift to include Facebook, but I am happy with where I am for now.  (Note that I am not trying to disparage fb or those who use it. I just don't think it would be a good choice for me at the present.)

​I see where that could be very wise. rachael convinced me to join back in the day and I've disliked her for it more days than not.

Edited April 9, 2015 by franciscanheart

[Tony]

So, I  gave up twitter for Lent, best idea ever. When I went back, I got super annoyed with it, so I went back to giving it up. Twitter is  a message board on steroids, you have all of this information coming at you at once, all these contacts, etc and it gets quite overwhelming, but at the same time addicting. I was annoyed with both of these things so that's why I left.. again.  My account is somewhat anonymous (you might be able to find it, if you do, congrats) so It is kind of neat to have the whole mystery thing Fran mentioned.  Only a small handful know my real name.

 

Now facebook is a whole different ball game. if I add you on facebook, (or try), that means I want to keep in touch with you years in advance.  Now there could only be contact every 1, 2,3,6 months, even a year, but facebook gives you an efficient way of doing just that, and it takes seconds out of your day. I thought that was the whole point?

[AccountDeleted]

So, I  gave up twitter for Lent, best idea ever. When I went back, I got super annoyed with it, so I went back to giving it up. Twitter is  a message board on steroids, you have all of this information coming at you at once, all these contacts, etc and it gets quite overwhelming, but at the same time addicting. I was annoyed with both of these things so that's why I left.. again.  My account is somewhat anonymous (you might be able to find it, if you do, congrats) so It is kind of neat to have the whole mystery thing Fran mentioned.  Only a small handful know my real name.

 

Now facebook is a whole different ball game. if I add you on facebook, (or try), that means I want to keep in touch with you years in advance.  Now there could only be contact every 1, 2,3,6 months, even a year, but facebook gives you an efficient way of doing just that, and it takes seconds out of your day. I thought that was the whole point?

​That's funny because I hate FB but I still have Twitter, but it is a limited account. I follow some news feeds so I know what's happening in the world, but I don't follow any individuals and I don't have any followers. For me it is mainly to get all my news in one place.

[marigold]

I've noticed lately a lot of negative posts about people or issues or articles or.. whatever.. across all social media platforms. I feel like so much of my newsfeed or timeline or whatever is about how people are wrong and not how people are beautiful. Selfies, pictures of kids, memes making fun of people, news articles being mocked, more babies, maybe a kitten...

Where's the balance? I try to use my Facebook account to build people up -- to celebrate life and have something to look back on when I'm feeling blue. How did it become so negative? When did it turn into the FOMO-inducing monster that it is? Has it always been that way?

Is balance possible in social media? Can we both point out why people are wrong AND supply two or three times as many pieces about how people are right? Or better yet, point out things that are beautiful or uplifting or enriching? I hesitate to say never but I very often do not see good book excerpts being shared or saint lives being honored. Lots of HERE'S MAH FOOD or MURICA posts but not much else.

Before you say I have the wrong friends, remember that many of you are friends with me on Facebook.  And a lot of the negative comes from my Christian friends.

There are a few that are always such a light in my feed, and for them I am grateful. But I wonder -- if my friends who post criticisms of things are not doing anything wrong, how can I (or we) encourage the other end of things -- the lighter, happier, more positive and encouraging things?

 

I'm rambling. I'll shut up.

​Here's how I cheer myself up about the state of humanity. I always used to read the 'random acts of kindness' section in the back of the London Metro growing up, and the habit followed me online when I moved away: http://art.tfl.gov.uk/actsofkindness