Living poverty: a year without new possessions

[beatitude]

The first lesson from my year without buying things: it is making me appreciate treats in a way I haven't for years. A couple of days ago I remembered that I had meant to buy a picture or other nice piece of artwork to brighten up the rather bland and boring walls of my new bedroom. I had seen just the picture I wanted too - a photograph of a hauntingly beautiful Antarctic sea, taken by an explorer - and I wished I'd remembered to buy it before I went on my no-spending embargo. I've wanted a copy of that photo ever since I saw it in an exhibition in 2008, but I'd never seen it on sale before. Then it occurred to me that when family members ask me what I'd like for Christmas, I could ask for the picture. And I realised - for several Christmases I've felt little to no anticipation over gifts, as I have my own income and I buy everything I want or need for myself. Really wanting something and waiting until Christmas to have it is something I haven't experienced since childhood. And it feels good to have that magical childlike, "Wow, a present!!!" feeling back.  As Nada said, this is also encouraging me to be creative. I remembered that my dad has some glossy paper for printing photos, so I could go on my parents' computer and print a few nice family photos for the wall (perhaps rediscovering family events that I don't even remember!). Then there is artwork done by children I have worked with - I could put one of their pictures on my wall as a reminder of them.

The second thing I have been discovering is that it feels very freeing to see something in a shop that looks interesting (yesterday it was a beautiful icon of the Tree of Life) and then think, "No, I can't buy it." Perhaps as the year goes on it will get harder, but for now it's like a weight off my heart. Everything feels simpler, clearer from the outset.

 

[marigold]

The first lesson from my year without buying things: it is making me appreciate treats in a way I haven't for years. A couple of days ago I remembered that I had meant to buy a picture or other nice piece of artwork to brighten up the rather bland and boring walls of my new bedroom. I had seen just the picture I wanted too - a photograph of a hauntingly beautiful Antarctic sea, taken by an explorer - and I wished I'd remembered to buy it before I went on my no-spending embargo. I've wanted a copy of that photo ever since I saw it in an exhibition in 2008, but I'd never seen it on sale before. Then it occurred to me that when family members ask me what I'd like for Christmas, I could ask for the picture. And I realised - for several Christmases I've felt little to no anticipation over gifts, as I have my own income and I buy everything I want or need for myself. Really wanting something and waiting until Christmas to have it is something I haven't experienced since childhood. And it feels good to have that magical childlike, "Wow, a present!!!" feeling back.  As Nada said, this is also encouraging me to be creative. I remembered that my dad has some glossy paper for printing photos, so I could go on my parents' computer and print a few nice family photos for the wall (perhaps rediscovering family events that I don't even remember!). Then there is artwork done by children I have worked with - I could put one of their pictures on my wall as a reminder of them.

The second thing I have been discovering is that it feels very freeing to see something in a shop that looks interesting (yesterday it was a beautiful icon of the Tree of Life) and then think, "No, I can't buy it." Perhaps as the year goes on it will get harder, but for now it's like a weight off my heart. Everything feels simpler, clearer from the outset.

 

Yay, I love the magical childhood feeling of presents! My birthday in the monastery was amazing because I had no idea what my family were going to send, or if they'd send anything at all! The sisters took care to find out what my favourite cake was and make it, and they all signed a card which had been handmade by one of them. It was SO much better than I'd expected! (I think I was also trying to feel a bit noble about the possibility that the birthday would just get passed over... so the fact that it was a big deal meant a lot to my little postulant heart )

[Gabriela]

The second thing I have been discovering is that it feels very freeing to see something in a shop that looks interesting (yesterday it was a beautiful icon of the Tree of Life) and then think, "No, I can't buy it." Perhaps as the year goes on it will get harder, but for now it's like a weight off my heart. Everything feels simpler, clearer from the outset.

Yeah, there's a book called "The Paradox of Choice" that talks about how Americans are overwhelmed by all the (buying) decisions they have to make daily. It follows that if you make a decision once, and stick with it, you'd feel a lot less overwhelmed. It certainly is liberating.

In other news, I think it's really beautiful that we're using the VS now to share with one another our positive experiences of voluntary poverty.  [< good cry!]

[marigold]

What about going for coffee and dining out?

[sr.christinaosf]

For what it's worth (if anything), I thought I'd share an article I posted this spring about our living of poverty: https://ourfranciscanfiat.wordpress.com/2015/05/25/so-that-by-his-poverty-you-might-become-rich-reflections-on-evangelical-poverty/

“…so that by his poverty you might become rich” ~ Reflections on Evangelical Poverty

MAY 25, 2015 / OUR FRANCISCAN FIAT / EDIT

Sr. Christina M. Neumann, OSF

For some time, I’ve been thinking of doing a series of posts on our three vows, the evangelical counsels of poverty, chastity, and obedience.

Today’s liturgy, for the eighth Monday of Ordinary Time, with its beautiful references to poverty, inspired me to put to get started.  It is also fitting to reflect on voluntary poverty as we just celebrated Pentecost, calling on the Holy Spirit as the “Father of the Poor.”

I was touched by reading the gospel antiphon in my preparations for Mass, which so beautifully states: “Jesus Christ became poor although he was rich, so that by his poverty you might become rich.”  I was struck by how kind and generous He was to us in taking on our human poverty.  At Mass today, we went on to hear about the rich young man.

As Sisters vowed to poverty, we seek to imitate this generous poverty of Christ in our daily lives.  I’d like to share with you some passages from our Franciscan Rule and our constitutions that inspire and instruct us in our living of this poverty.

From the Rule: 

“The truly poor in spirit, following the example of the Lord, live in this world as pilgrims and strangers.  They neither appropriate nor defend anything as their own. So excellent is this most high Poverty that it makes us heirs and rulers of the kingdom of heaven. It makes us materially poor, but rich in virtue.  Let this Poverty alone be our portion because it leads to the land of the living.  Clinging completely to it let us, for the sake of Our Lord Jesus Christ never want anything else under heaven.”

“All the sisters and brothers zealously follow the Poverty and humility of Our Lord Jesus Christ.  Though rich beyond measure (2 Cor. 8:9), he emptied himself for our sake(Phil. 2:7)”

“So excellent is this most high Poverty that it makes us heirs and rulers of the kingdom of heaven.  It makes us materially poor, but rich in virtue (Jn. 2:5).  Let this Poverty alone be our portion because it leads to the land of the living”

In our Constitutions, we read:

“Because Jesus Christ, although He was rich, became poor for us, we, as pilgrims and strangers in this world, will follow Him in Poverty and humility.”

“Only when Poverty makes us interiorly free and available can it witness to an unconditional trust in God, understandable to the people of our time.”

“In our Vow of Poverty, we obligate ourselves to a simple, unpretentious life.”

“For each of us individually, our freely chosen Poverty must find expression in spirit and in fact”

“Our personal efforts to acquire the spirit of Poverty will be perfected in our loving acceptance of the Will of God in sickness, aging, and death.”

“We have our goods in common. What we earn by our labor or what we receive as a gift belongs to the community.”

“As individuals and as members of a community, we frequently evaluate how well we are living our Poverty in the light of the Gospel and of St. Francis’ charismatic love of Poverty, so that our love for Poverty will grow in spirit and in fact.”

“In our concern for the right practice of Poverty, we keep in mind that Poverty is worthless unless we are devoted to one another in heartfelt love.”

~ ~ ~ ~

Everyone, regardless of his or her state in life, can strive to practice the counsels Christ gives us in the gospels.

[beatitude]

 

 

“The truly poor in spirit, following the example of the Lord, live in this world as pilgrims and strangers.  They neither appropriate nor defend anything as their own...Clinging completely to it [poverty] let us, for the sake of Our Lord Jesus Christ never want anything else under heaven."

Sister, this passage from the Rule is spine-tinglingly beautiful. It reminds me of a Jewish story about the famous rabbi known as the Chofetz Chaim: a traveller saw how bare and empty his room was and asked where all his possessions were kept. The Chofetz Chaim asked in his turn, "Where are yours?" The traveller said, "I don't have any, I'm just passing through." "So am I," replied the Chofetz Chaim.

I am going to adopt Barbara Therese's box-a-week idea. My first box will be filled with devotional books and other religious items that I never touch and that others may make far better use of. I will place the box in the student chaplaincy and invite people to take what they want. The next week I will do the same for other books, the following week for clothes, and so on. I cling far too much to things that I never use because they hold some kind of sentimental value for me and I need to break myself of this habit - going through life like this is like being a tourist who has one opportunity to be in a spectacular place and who spends at least half that time anxiously buying souvenirs.

@Marigold, your question about coffee and dining out is a good one. I don't drink coffee and I prefer to make my own tea at home (why buy a cup from a cafe when for the same price I could get a whole box of tea and make it in a much bigger mug!) but I do eat out quite regularly. I have a disability that gets in the way of cooking. I have a support worker who cooks with me twice a week and we freeze a few portions for me to reheat on other days. But that doesn't cover every meal. My weight has a tendency to dip too low and I have difficulty maintaining it in the healthy range, so I have decided that for me the sensible choice is just to eat when hungry, even if that means grabbing lunch from a cafe rather than waiting until I get home. I don't exactly go to sumptuous places (I use the cafes near campus, which cater to students on a budget) but I know that a cafe lunch would still be classed as a luxury for many people. For me it's a pragmatic decision. I think it will be different for each of us.

[Gabriela]

going through life like this is like being a tourist who has one opportunity to be in a spectacular place and who spends at least half that time anxiously buying souvenirs.

What an image. 

[BarbTherese]

Hi Beatitude :

I am going to adopt Barbara Therese's box-a-week idea.

 

Not my idea - whoever posted it however, it is a good way to start to my mind. 

[Makarioi]

It was Swami Mommy! I need to start with about 5 boxes a week though LOL

[marigold]

@Marigold, your question about coffee and dining out is a good one. I don't drink coffee and I prefer to make my own tea at home (why buy a cup from a cafe when for the same price I could get a whole box of tea and make it in a much bigger mug!) but I do eat out quite regularly. I have a disability that gets in the way of cooking. I have a support worker who cooks with me twice a week and we freeze a few portions for me to reheat on other days. But that doesn't cover every meal. My weight has a tendency to dip too low and I have difficulty maintaining it in the healthy range, so I have decided that for me the sensible choice is just to eat when hungry, even if that means grabbing lunch from a cafe rather than waiting until I get home. I don't exactly go to sumptuous places (I use the cafes near campus, which cater to students on a budget) but I know that a cafe lunch would still be classed as a luxury for many people. For me it's a pragmatic decision. I think it will be different for each of us.

Yep, that makes a lot of sense. For me, dining is a complex one because it's so bound up in being sociable, giving and receiving love, etc. Usually my benchmark is whether it pleases only me and my passions (getting a coffee when I'm out) or whether it benefits a relationship and opportunities for showing love (getting coffee with my flatmate when we need a break). Perish alone, saved together. Am I weird for applying existential questions to café culture?

[Feankie]

Got my boxes out and raring to go!  St. Vincent de Paul store will be excited to see me coming!

 

[Era Might]

I dislike having "things." I almost never buy anything, not because I'm cheap but I tend to spend when I'm with people, though this isn't a great habit either because I end up not having any "things" I need and just spending at restaurants and stuff lol (e.g., I'm lazy about spending to maintain my car). I'm trying to live a more philosophical life, so I want to focus not so much on "poverty" but on spending in ways that are going to create an alternative. Just not spending doesn't do anything constructive, but if I spend on things that are going to build a positive alternative to consumer culture, then to me that's worth spending. But I hate being in stores. I hate thinking about money, period. I don't really believe in "gifts"...do people really need another thing from me during Christmas or their birthday? I'd rather invite them to my house to eat and spend on the ingredients to cook.

Edited July 10, 2015 by Era Might

[Gabriela]

Perish alone, saved together. Am I weird for applying existential questions to café culture?

Well said! And no, I don't think that's weird at all. I think we need to be more conscious and reflective of ALL our behaviors.

I dislike having "things." I almost never buy anything, not because I'm cheap but I tend to spend when I'm with people, though this isn't a great habit either because I end up not having any "things" I need and just spending at restaurants and stuff lol (e.g., I'm lazy about spending to maintain my car). I'm trying to live a more philosophical life, so I want to focus not so much on "poverty" but on spending in ways that are going to create an alternative. Just not spending doesn't do anything constructive, but if I spend on things that are going to build a positive alternative to consumer culture, then to me that's worth spending. But I hate being in stores. I hate thinking about money, period. I don't really believe in "gifts"...do people really need another thing from me during Christmas or their birthday? I'd rather invite them to my house to eat and spend on the ingredients to cook.

You make really good points, Era. 

[Yaatee]

Yep, that makes a lot of sense. For me, dining is a complex one because it's so bound up in being sociable, giving and receiving love, etc. Usually my benchmark is whether it pleases only me and my passions (getting a coffee when I'm out) or whether it benefits a relationship and opportunities for showing love (getting coffee with my flatmate when we need a break). Perish alone, saved together. Am I weird for applying existential questions to café culture?

No. It's perfectly reasonable to want to share eating with other people.  There is something celebratory about eating, especially if you make it yourself, also when you're out. 

I bought two new skirts because I want to wear more dresses and skirts, I may need at least one pair of leggings which I wear under skirts because of modesty.

I also do need another pair of shoes but I can hold off until my current pair really develop holes. (I just super glued the soles today)

However I FIGHT with myself all the time over my "drug" of choice - soda(cola)  I know its bad for me but I cant live without it.

I'm in for not buying anything not needed.

I  know that we should drink water instead of cola, but could you substitute diet soda instead of "cola", which I assume is--real cola.   I, for example, really prefer Diet Coke to regular Coke. N more than one a day, though, and usually far less.  There are a lot of different diet sodas out there. 

[Gabriela]

I  know that we should drink water instead of cola, but could you substitute diet soda instead of "cola", which I assume is--real cola.   I, for example, really prefer Diet Coke to regular Coke. N more than one a day, though, and usually far less.  There are a lot of different diet sodas out there. 

I teach public speaking to a bunch of STEM majors, and they regularly give speeches about how much worse for you diet soda is than regular soda. Apparently it confuses your brain about how much sugar you're ingesting, so your body starts hoarding sugar instead of giving it up when your body needs energy. People who drink diet soda commonly find they gain weight as a result, and are even more likely to develop diabetes.

I'd say just start making giant batches of iced tea at home, which you can sweeten naturally and carry around in a thermos or re-used bottle. It's much better for you. And then, on occasion, when you're celebrating something, have a (regular!) soda.

Alternatively, you could buy one of these: http://www.target.com/p/hamilton-beach-fizzini-hand-held-carbonated-water-maker-85105/-/A-14665401?ref=tgt_adv_XSG10001&AFID=google_pla_df&LNM=14665401&CPNG=Appliances&kpid=14665401&LID=3pgs&ci_src=17588969&ci_sku=14665401&kpid=14665401&gclid=Cj0KEQjw2v2sBRCazKGu3tSFz64BEiQAKIE1hnOouWTJGpwF5EU4Jg1XeO7ul9oo65gMRQP0sng485kaAo1R8P8HAQ

...and make your own carbonated beverages at home. I hear watermelon soda is amazing!

[marigold]

Yeah, diet is death. Just drink the normal stuff on a less regular basis...

[Yaatee]

I teach public speaking to a bunch of STEM majors, and they regularly give speeches about how much worse for you diet soda is than regular soda. Apparently it confuses your brain about how much sugar you're ingesting, so your body starts hoarding sugar instead of giving it up when your body needs energy. People who drink diet soda commonly find they gain weight as a result, and are even more likely to develop diabetes.

I'd say just start making giant batches of iced tea at home, which you can sweeten naturally and carry around in a thermos or re-used bottle. It's much better for you. And then, on occasion, when you're celebrating something, have a (regular!) soda.

Alternatively, you could buy one of these: http://www.target.com/p/hamilton-beach-fizzini-hand-held-carbonated-water-maker-85105/-/A-14665401?ref=tgt_adv_XSG10001&AFID=google_pla_df&LNM=14665401&CPNG=Appliances&kpid=14665401&LID=3pgs&ci_src=17588969&ci_sku=14665401&kpid=14665401&gclid=Cj0KEQjw2v2sBRCazKGu3tSFz64BEiQAKIE1hnOouWTJGpwF5EU4Jg1XeO7ul9oo65gMRQP0sng485kaAo1R8P8HAQ

...and make your own carbonated beverages at home. I hear watermelon soda is amazing!

Yes, you're probably right. I have read much the same, not only the confusion part, but some other research about the artificial sweeteners promoting insulin resistance, or some such. Stay tuned.

Apparently real seltzer is now being marketed. And better yet, as you  mentioned, one of those seltzer machines.  I'll check out that link--only we don't have enough space for it, probably--all those Diet Coke cartons  (joke)...

...it's also a matter of choose your poison.  I live near the rez, where obesity  and diabetes is really serious.  If switching to diet stuff could be a half-way house to iced tea or one of those cartridge things ( small and affordable!), then it might be worth it.  NOtice I say might.  Any port in a storm.

Off topic.  Sorry.  Your work is interesting.

[Antigonos]

 

...and make your own carbonated beverages at home. I hear watermelon soda is amazing!

Soda Stream!   There is an initial outlay, of course, but after that, just a very small charge for the gas canisters.  They make a variety of flavored syrups, but I like to just squeeze a lemon into the soda water, and/or add a few sprigs of mint.  Or, make an "egg cream" by adding some chocolate syrup and milk to a large glass and filling with soda water.  Memories of the Lower East Side!

Recently, Soda Stream in Israel was in the news because the factory is an outstanding example of Israeli-Palestinian cooperation, with close to 200 Palestinians employed by the company [which is Israeli]

[beatitude]

I hate thinking about money, period. I don't really believe in "gifts"...do people really need another thing from me during Christmas or their birthday? I'd rather invite them to my house to eat and spend on the ingredients to cook.

I love trying to think up the perfect present for someone, and if I didn't have limitations with cooking (unpredictable hand tremor + motor coordination issues = / = happy dinner party, unless you're one of these people who likes rare meat seeping with blood) I'd try this. Having someone over and cooking their favourite meal is a lovely idea for a gift. Lately I have started to give 'events' rather than physical presents - my nephew is horse-mad but his parents can't afford regular riding lessons for him, so for his birthday I am planning to book him a place on a day-long trail ride. I think this is another aspect of voluntary poverty, as Marigold said: choosing things that enhance and enrich our relationships with one another. Giving someone their fiftieth piece of jewellery doesn't really achieve that. Simple living makes more room for it.

Yeah, diet is death. Just drink the normal stuff on a less regular basis...

I love Diet Coke but hate the regular stuff. It's too sweet for my taste. I'm trying to wean myself off Diet Coke entirely, as the company is really nasty - their track record on workers' rights is disgusting. Every year I give the stuff up for Lent and every year I end up drinking it again after Lent is over. I need to exercise more willpower over this. In fact, I won't wait for Lent this time!

[beatitude]

Today I faced another challenge to my decision not to buy anything: I accidentally put my favourite rosary through the washing machine (a beautiful handmade olivewood one from Bethlehem) and it has lost its warm honey-coloured sheen, the texture has altered, and a couple of beads are chipped. My impulse was to run down the road and get another one like it. They cost the equivalent of $4, so not much. I had to tell myself sternly that it's still good to pray with even if it doesn't look and feel the same in my hands any more, and in any case a weather-beaten rosary is a sign of a well-used rosary, which is good. I am far too attached to externals when I pray, like the feel of the wood as it moves through my fingers and even the weight of the rosary, the size of the beads. I like it always to feel the same. I hadn't realised that until now.