Being To Hard On Yourself

[Piccoli Fiori JMJ]

+JMJ+

Am I the only who seems to be striving for perfection, even when I cannot attain it (At least not here on earth)? I guess I've been really down because I haven't been meeting my expectations for myself. It can be really stupid things too, simple things that I could have done to be more humble or selfless, but instead I feel like I was extreamly greedy and selfish, even though I really wasn't horrible about. I don't know. I feel like I'm babbling on and on... that's all from me...

God Bless and Mary Protect...
Yours in the Most Sacred Hearts of Jesus and Mary,

FutureNunJMJ

[daugher-of-Mary]

Yes, I know what you mean. Please be careful about beating yourself up about it...I got in the habit of doing that, and ended up with a year of scrupulosity which was horrible. Instead give yourself ENTIRELY to Jesus and trust Him to give you the strength and love that you need. If you fall, don't dwell on it, but concentrate on getting up and moving on.

[quote]"I understood so well that it is only love which makes us acceptable to God that this love is the only good I ambition. Jesus deigned to show me the road that leads to this Divine Furnace, and this road is the [b]surrender[/b] of the little child who sleeps without fear in its Father's arms."
[/quote]

[Piccoli Fiori JMJ]

+JMJ+

Hey, where's that quote from? It's awesome!

God Bless and Mary Protect...
Yours in the Most Sacred Hearts of Jesus and Mary,

FutureNunJMJ +

[daugher-of-Mary]

Oh sorry! That would be from St. Therese. :wub:

[Piccoli Fiori JMJ]

It okay, it's just beautiful!

[heyyoimjohnny]

I was beating myself up just last night! What a coincodence. I got mad at myself cuz I felt like I never do anything that makes a difference, even when I try. And when I do, I try to do it for God, but then I wonder if I did it for my own selfish reasons.
And I'm also vain and nosy, and don't come aross right when I try to help. So yeah, I'm actually still pretty ticked at myself.

[hopeful1]

yep, guilty here too.

[Carnanc]

wow being overly scrupulous is very serious spiritual problem, at times it had me sitting for hours worrying about sin that didn't even exist. I think for me at least its so important I don't think negative thoughts about my self, just look to Christ, and in Him I can find great courage to overcome fear.

[lifeteenchick527]

ya i can be too hard on myself...but it doesnt help when everyone thinks that u are alwayss happy...like one of my dads friends was on catholic answers radio show...and he started talkin about how iam always happy...and its like now whenever at church i feel like i have to be smiling bc thats wat every1 expects .... ya knoe

[Iacobus]

I don't think I am always too hard on my self but Father thinks I might look for sins too hard. LOL! I probly do sometimes, lol, but most of the sins I confess are ones where right afterwards I go "Whoa that was a sin."

[immaculata]

My accompanist once told me, "Leave perfection to the angels."

I'm [i]very[/i] hard on myself. I tend to punish myself for things that aren't my fault.

[StColette]

I'm very hard on myself as well. Especially when it comes to school. I've gotten to the point when I try and try but never seem to be able to get something exactly right, and I just burst into tears, because I feel like I'm going to fail at everything. But I've started to learn that perfection just isn't possible.

[shelly_freak]

I always catch my sins right after I do them also. If only I had a time machine!

[Dust's Sister]

I'm hard on myself too. It's like everytime I say a curseword (every great once in a while) I always try to correct myself and say "God, please forgive me"... and then whenever I want to say mean things about a person I try not to say it outloud because I know that's not very nice.

Sometimes, I feel like I let people walk over me though, whenever they do bad stuff to me, or take advantage of me (like borrowing money, or whatever), but I just do it because it's a nice generous thing to do you know, but I would still like for them to pay me back, but I still think "What would Jesus Do?"... I've been answering that question to myself a lot lately, whenever I think of bad thoughts, and evil things to say, I just think of Jesus....

Like, I was riding with somebody in a car today who I hardly even know, and everytime a car would get in her way, or cut her off or something, she'd say all these cursewords to them, and even use the Lord's name in vain... and I wanted to say to her so badly... "Girl, do you always have to curse all the time? Can you please not use the Lord's name in vain?"

I wanted to say that so bad, but this was a grown woman like in her upper 30's, and I was only 22 so I didn't want to complain to her in that way. I just hate it when I hear the Lord's name in vain though, it makes me so mad.

I do believe that I am too hard on myself sometimes, but hey, I wanna make sure I go to Heaven, right?

[lanie]

I don't think I'm hard on myself but my shrink says I am... In my eyes though I just tell myself the truth... its just the way I see things and the way I see myself.
I hate myself but thats genuine. I often feel used and second best. I punish myself for even the smallest things that happen, I guess thats just life though.
I should go to confession though... and stop being to selfish.

Edited July 8, 2004 by lanie

[Crusader_4]

How does one know if they are being over scroupoulous?

[Piccoli Fiori JMJ]

Good question... I mean, I know I am a miserable little soul, but with God, I know I become wonderful! How would you know if you were being over scrupulous... ?? :scratch:

[RemnantRules]

me hard time...NOOOO. LOL. i honestly don't think i do.

Looking at my little bro though, man i need to calm him down. He will have a stroke by he's 18!

[Carnanc]

[quote name='Crusader_4' date='Jul 9 2004, 12:21 AM'] How does one know if they are being over scroupoulous? [/quote]
[url="http://mission.liguori.org/newsletters/archives.htm#SA"]http://mission.liguori.org/newsletters/archives.htm#SA[/url]
Here's a newsletter for the scrupulous.
[url="http://www.traditionalmass.org/Fighting%20Scrupulosity.htm"]http://www.traditionalmass.org/Fighting%20Scrupulosity.htm[/url]
I know its one of those traditional Mass sites but the info on scrupulosity is accurate I believe, and matches my other research.

Scrupuloisty is kind of a religious form of OCD. It is a preoccupation with sin especially for me struggling over if something is a mortal or venial sin, in some cases where there is actually no sin at all! You know because it is devestating to your prayer life because you might spend an hour or more just struggling about one occasion of impure thoughts, trying to decide if its a mortal sin, which can be followed by some by very frequent confession, in which on goes only out of insecurity because many times there is no sin. Its a habit that the deeper you do into its harder to get out of. Even when you know that something is not serious sin, you have a persistant doubt that won't go away. Thats why its sometimes called the "doubting disease". St. Alphonsus Ligouri suffered greatly from scrupulosity I believe, One thing that is pretty sweet is that my experience with this, as I got away from it, it helps me be much more self-aware than i other wise would have been able to be I think . pretty sweet.

[Piccoli Fiori JMJ]

Those are some pretty cool links there! Very helpful!