Sojourner Posted July 16, 2004 Posted July 16, 2004 I am the oldest of five children; I'm 27, then I have a brother who is 26, another brother who is 24, a sister who is 19, and a brother who is 12. So I guess we count as a big family. Personally, I wouldn't have had it any other way. It's not as though parents have only a set amount of love, and split it equally among all the children. My parents loved ALL of us very much, and we all knew that. (although we have each doubted it at various times). We all got special time at various points with each of our parents, and we were all encouraged to pursue our own interests. And, we spent a lot of time entertaining ourselves. We had enough in my family to play tag, or school, or get into mischief. Yeah, we all had to work, and as the oldest I ended up giving Mom and Dad a bunch of free babysitting ... but it was a good way to grow up. Lots of love. I'm single now, and I find myself gravitating toward families. I love it. I want my own big family someday. From a practical standpoint, one thing I've heard from many middle-aged friends who grew up as only children is that they now have to shoulder the entire care of their parents themselves, whereas with bigger families that burden can be shared among many children. This is a consideration that you might not make in college, but it sure becomes important later in life. Caring for an elderly parent can be very taxing, both emotionally and financially, and it's great if that's a burden that can be shared.
VeraMaria Posted July 16, 2004 Author Posted July 16, 2004 [quote name='Colleen' date='Jul 16 2004, 07:20 PM'] It's funny, because you know, the average family of four (two parents, two kids) usually don't spend a whole lot of time together. In reality, there oftentimes isn't a lot of attention for anyone. I've noticed this with some of my friends. Usually the mother and father both work and aren't at home until the evening, and the kids are either watching TV, talking on the phone, or playing video games. There's hardly any interaction at all. It's not always the case, of course, but more often than not, it is. And then there's my family. There's nine of us (mom, dad, 5 boys, 2 girls). Oh and the dog and the bird. We're noisy, boistrous, loud . . . yeah, you get the point. We're always together and our house is small, so we can't help but give each other plenty of attention! We don't have a lot in terms of money and material things, but I will say that we are a pretty happy bunch and get along with each other better than a lot of our friends who have only two or three kids in their family. I think because there are so many different opinions being expressed all the time (constantly, I tell you!), we learn to get along better. That just seems like a silly argument to me. I mean, would you limit yourself to just two friends so that you made sure that they got enough attention from you? Of course not! There is truth to the saying, "the more the merrier." [/quote] yeah Colleen! I know it's a silly argument, its just that they (and my friends, who all agreed) didn't take my words to have a lot of weight because of my family Keep these coming! It's soo true...especialy about the working parents and attention in small families.
Philippe Posted July 16, 2004 Posted July 16, 2004 i wish i had a big family.... i feel very lonely in my house sometimes
lifeteenchick527 Posted July 16, 2004 Posted July 16, 2004 u can always can come and hang out with my family philippe lol
RandomProddy Posted July 16, 2004 Posted July 16, 2004 4 younger sisters and a single mum. And people wonder why I've never had a steady girlfriend...
littleflower+JMJ Posted July 17, 2004 Posted July 17, 2004 [quote name='RandomProddy' date='Jul 16 2004, 06:48 PM'] 4 younger sisters and a single mum. And people wonder why I've never had a steady girlfriend... [/quote] Your outnumbered in your own home!! :BANAN: I WANT THE CATHOLIC DOZEN!!
cmotherofpirl Posted July 17, 2004 Posted July 17, 2004 [quote name='RandomProddy' date='Jul 16 2004, 08:48 PM'] 4 younger sisters and a single mum. And people wonder why I've never had a steady girlfriend... [/quote] Yes but you will make a wonderful husband, you have been civilized!!!!
RandomProddy Posted July 17, 2004 Posted July 17, 2004 (edited) [quote name='cmotherofpirl' date='Jul 17 2004, 03:29 AM'] Yes but you will make a wonderful husband, you have been civilized!!!! [/quote] Two minor points, if only I found women as attractive as I used to, and I'd have to find a woman who reciprocated. "Civilized" men generally get found in late age Edited July 17, 2004 by RandomProddy
Maddalena Posted July 17, 2004 Posted July 17, 2004 I have just one brother but I would have liked to have had more siblings.
luciana Posted July 17, 2004 Posted July 17, 2004 [quote name='Moosey' date='Jul 16 2004, 06:15 PM'] Thats so true cmotherofproof. Everyone thinks my four year old brother is my son. I dont like to play favorites but hes closest to my heart..hes my little guy He once asked me if he came from my belly... very bad. I had to explain to him that I was his sister and thats not possible lol. [/quote] My lil sis is now 17 and driving:blink: but when she was younger and I was a teen, we once passed for mom and daughter, which was weird cause I look young (I'm 29) for my age. I'm the oldest of 5:me 29, my sisters: 26 and 17, my two brothers:25 and turning 24 in a week. We would have been 6, my mom miscarried in between my sister and me. On the attention issue my two youngest siblings received plenty of attention probably more than the rest of us. Sojourner:[quote]Personally, I wouldn't have had it any other way. It's not as though parents have only a set amount of love, and split it equally among all the children. My parents loved ALL of us very much, and we all knew that. (although we have each doubted it at various times). We all got special time at various points with each of our parents, and we were all encouraged to pursue our own interests. And, we spent a lot of time entertaining ourselves. We had enough in my family to play tag, or school, or get into mischief. Yeah, we all had to work, and as the oldest I ended up giving Mom and Dad a bunch of free babysitting ... but it was a good way to grow up. Lots of love.[/quote] That sounds like my family to a T. We didn't have much materially, but we made up in creativity. You should have seen some of the crazy games we played Now, we love to reminisce about them and tell stories to my lil sis who doesn't remember too much of our craziness. We only got a camcorder when she was about 2, so our zaniness is not fully documented for future generations. I have an uncle in France who has ten kids!!! They were not well off when young, and were locos like us Now all ten are young teens and young adults and are the nicest, kindest siblings I know. They are so close and get along better than our measly 5! Some more proofbeside Raph's and colleen's proof for the good of big families: In my experience, children of big families usually want a lot of kids, too. Ususally only children do not say they want just one child, they usually want to give their child siblings because they know what it was like.
luciana Posted July 17, 2004 Posted July 17, 2004 (edited) Did you watch Cheaper By the Dozen? The modern one is nothing like the book, but it showed the craziness and love that big families have. We loved it and could relate to it. They contrast the big family w/ the neighbor's one child family.and the big family wins (no disrespect to any only kids out there) P.S. the original movie which IS like the book inc. the parts where the mom goes aginst some Planned Parenthood person, is on DVD now!!. I just ordered it to surprise my 26yr.old sis who loved the book when she was little, I read it but don't remember it too much. Edited July 17, 2004 by luciana
littleflower+JMJ Posted July 17, 2004 Posted July 17, 2004 [quote name='luciana' date='Jul 17 2004, 03:15 AM'] Did you watch Cheaper By the Dozen? The modern one is nothing like the book, but it showed the craziness and love that big families have. We loved it and could relate to it. They contrast the big family w/ the neighbor's one child family.and the big family wins (no disrespect to any only kids out there) P.S. the original movie which IS like the book inc. the parts where the mom goes aginst some Planned Parenthood person, is on DVD now!!. I just ordered it to surprise my 26yr.old sis who loved the book when she was little, I read it but don't remember it too much. [/quote] i htink i need to read hte book!!
VeraMaria Posted July 17, 2004 Author Posted July 17, 2004 thanks so much for responding. You all have awesome families. God Bless!!
Lil Red Posted July 17, 2004 Posted July 17, 2004 i'm the baby of 10. so i think i have a unique perspective on the attention factor. my older brothers and sisters were always there for me, to give encouragement, support, teasing, teaching, whatever. i firmly believe my oldest sibling is such a good mom to her two kids because she had 9 siblings. and yeah, maybe she did help "raise" them, but she learned responsibility at an early age. my family doesn't always get along, but we're there for each other when we need to be. and i don't think i suffered from not enough attention - at times i thought i got too much! studies have shown that if you have 4 or more siblings, it decreases your chance to get allergies. i read that in National Catholic Register.
~*AnCoRa33*~ Posted July 17, 2004 Posted July 17, 2004 YKC! I also come from a big family (middle of 7) and I wouldn't trade it for the world! The oldest is 28 and the youngest is 4 so there is a wide varity! It's so great because there is that spread of ages, you can get anything needed. I can talk to my older brother (he's married and has kids) or my sisters will take me out "just to hang" and I can talk to her. Or I have my little siblings that are just the joy in my life!! A brother who's 18 months younger then me that I can talk to and fight with. A sister who puts me up on a pedastool... just like I did to my sisters! I love having my siblings. I know so much more because of them! I would always adore my sister's and do ANYTHING for them to like me and I learned how to deal with my 8 year old sister doing the SAME thing to me!! Being the middle child gave me a great advantage because I had to live in the shadow of the older AND take care of the younger and create a shadow for them! I had a big responsibility. Of course we don't get everything we want but CERTAINLY everything we need! When the whole family is together it's just loud and the most FUN thing in the world!!!!!! It's grat, when we go out to eat, we normally end up getting the party rooms all to ourselves because we are so big! *WHEW* what a mou- er ... handful... I'll go now!! Pax Christi, Rebecca, <><
little_angel202 Posted July 17, 2004 Posted July 17, 2004 i have 4 lil brothers the youngest is exactly (well apart from a few weeks!) 10 years younger than me which is really cool bc when i'm 20 he will be 10 ect. i love them all to bits with their crazy habbits and sayings, there the best thing my parents could have ever given me !!! but somettimes its really hard putting up with them. i guess the best thing about having 4 younger brothers is actually the responsability for me i mean i was like changing nappies when i was 5 years old and i do tons of stuff some of my friends wont do untill they have kids of their own but thats really good for me lol everyone tells me what a great mum i'll be i cant wait to have kids !! a friend of mine has 13 other bros/sis !!!
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