My theory on staying a virgin till marriage

[curtins]

[quote name='heavenseeker' date='Aug 14 2005, 09:49 PM']if  its something you woudn't  want your parents watching you do then don't do it.
thats a way of thinking if somethings ok to do befor marrage.
another is if you have to think about it being the right thing to do then it probably isn't
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the 1st one is 100% correct-

however

I'd have to disagree with #2
I would think that those of us who struggle with being over scrupulous would say the same thing

alot of times you'll think something is a sin when its really not and you're being over scrupulous

[immaculata]

hahaha... my mom always used to tell me, "If it's something you'd be ashamed to tell your grandma about, don't do it!!"

[heavenseeker]

[quote name='curtins' date='Aug 14 2005, 08:52 PM']the 1st one is 100% correct-

however

I'd have to disagree with #2
I would think that those of us who struggle with being over scrupulous would say the same thing

alot of times you'll think something is a sin when its really not and you're being over scrupulous
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i can understand that. but for the most part it works

[homeschoolmom]

If you don't want to tell Jesus about it, don't do it.

[heavenseeker]

[quote name='homeschoolmom' date='Aug 14 2005, 09:42 PM']If you don't want to tell Jesus about it, don't do it.
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thats a good one

[sweetpea316]

[quote name='homeschoolmom' date='Aug 14 2005, 09:42 PM']If you don't want to tell Jesus about it, don't do it.
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Yep...that's what I was always told to remember.

[White Knight]

I remember one especially ment for this issue. "Guard your eyes, guard your heart." that also comes in handly. If ya watch alot of sexual trash you'll likely fall to it, if you resist it, and go in steadfasting and guard your eyes and heart you'll more liekly resist it.

Prayer is also another big cure to resist sexual temptations.

[picchick]

Prayer and perseverence are important things in a chaste person's life. You need prayer because it makes you strong. You need perseverence because people are going to come and say pre-marital acts are ok. Maybe they won't come right out and say it. Maybe they will be subtle about it. Like "Well I waited a long time and I made sure that I was ready." or the classic line, "I knew that I was going to marry him/her so it is ok." Constant casual conversation about it is also not good.

"Hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil."

Surround yourself with chaste friends as well. It is so much easier to have someone who is struggling just like you. Then you can have mature conversations about chastity and sexuality. These conversations (if mature) can actually help a person grow towards holiness at least for me. BUT IT MUST BE SOMEONE WHO CAN BE MATURE ABOUT IT.

Well there is my little soap box diddy.
God Bless
Meg

[homeschoolmom]

[quote name='picchick' date='Aug 14 2005, 11:11 PM']  BUT IT MUST BE SOMEONE WHO CAN BE MATURE ABOUT IT.[right][snapback]685249[/snapback][/right]
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and someone of the same sex...

[Paladin D]

[color=blue][b]HOLY carp! Curtin's 2nd reason was a joke, what the hell people![/color][/b]

[homeschoolmom]

yeah, I think he said that somewhere...

[blueufo7]

I think that the question of virginity shouldn't be raised. Why does it matter? if someone has made a commitment from this day forward to remain chaste, that is the important thing. There may be plenty of virgins out there who have done everything sexual short of intercourse... while those who have fallen and have gotten up with greater resolution to be chaste in all aspects of life... ya see what I mean? Good for him or her that is chaste and a virgin.

When I give chastity talks to 7th graders, sometimes they'll ask me, "are you a virgin?" And I'll reply, "that's none of your business dude! the better question to ask is 'have you made a commitment to be chaste?'"

[White Knight]

I dislike all the attention of sex, Yes the issues must be addressed and not ignored, but when people talk about it all the time trying to get one another to give in its, well stressful trying to keep ones committment. Unfortunately our culture influences this motive. which completely smells of elderberries.

[Luthien]

[quote name='blueufo7' date='Aug 15 2005, 12:16 AM']I think that the question of virginity shouldn't be raised.  Why does it matter?  if someone has made a commitment from this day forward to remain chaste, that is the important thing.  There may be plenty of virgins out there who have done everything sexual short of intercourse... while those who have fallen and have gotten up with greater resolution to be chaste in all aspects of life... ya see what I mean? Good for him or her that is chaste and a virgin.

When I give chastity talks to 7th graders, sometimes they'll ask me, "are you a virgin?"  And I'll reply, "that's none of your business dude!  the better question to ask is 'have you made a commitment to be chaste?'" 
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This is a very good point bluefro. Though I am neither of those types of people, I do know others who fall into the latter category, and they are the most loving sacrificial people I have ever been honored to come across.

Its not just retaining virginity, its retaining purity of heart. I find that not even letting an impure thought enter my mind is the best way to combat impurity. Fasting is also a good way, because it denies a natural impulse to eat, therefore training resistance to other impulses.

Concerning being pure in a relationship, imagine how you would want your future bride to be treated if she had been in a relationship before you? I must say, I do [b]not[/b] regret [b]not[/b] making out with my boyfriends. I don't regret [b]not[/b] giving in to pressure to do things I didn't see as maintaining my chastity. It was hard, because I was constantly bombarded with pressure. But like I said, I dont regret saying,[b] "No." [/b]

Chastity isn't just refraining from sex, its a way of life that all people can live by, be it married people, religious, teens, and single people. The freedom I feel to be able to love someone purely has fulfilled me in a way that making out and beyond could never do.

[homeschoolmom]

[quote name='Luthien' date='Aug 15 2005, 08:59 AM']Chastity isn't just refraining from sex, its a way of life that all people can live by, be it married people, religious, teens, and single people. The freedom I feel to be able to love someone purely has fulfilled me in a way that making out and beyond could never do.
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[Laudate_Dominum]

[quote name='Luthien' date='Aug 15 2005, 08:59 AM']This is a very good point bluefro. Though I am neither of those types of people, I do know others who fall into the latter category, and they are the most loving sacrificial people I have ever been honored to come across.

Its not just retaining virginity, its retaining purity of heart. I find that not even letting an impure thought enter my mind is the best way to combat impurity. Fasting is also a good way, because it denies a natural impulse to eat, therefore training resistance to other impulses.

Concerning being pure in a relationship, imagine how you would want your future bride to be treated if she had been in a relationship before you? I must say, I do [b]not[/b] regret [b]not[/b] making out with my boyfriends. I don't regret [b]not[/b] giving in to pressure to do things I didn't see as maintaining my chastity. It was hard, because I was constantly bombarded with pressure. But like I said, I dont regret saying,[b] "No." [/b]

Chastity isn't just refraining from sex, its a way of life that all people can live by, be it married people, religious, teens, and single people. The freedom I feel to be able to love someone purely has fulfilled me in a way that making out and beyond could never do.
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:applause:

[curtins]

bumnp

[let_go_let_God]

Essentally, NO in itself is the most important word to remember. The more you say no, the more you can say yes to and the more doors open up to you.

God bless-
LGLG

[curtins]

bump

[picchick]

[quote name='Paladin D' date='Aug 14 2005, 11:44 PM'][color=blue][b]HOLY carp!  Curtin's 2nd reason was a joke, what the hell people![/color][/b]
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I know he was joking but some people on here still need to hear this. (I am not thinking of anyone in particular just in general there is always someone who needs support because their peers family etc don't support them).