Discernment monkey wrench?

[Marieteresa]

[color=gray]hey folkies,

Just when I have everything figured out a monkey wrench gets through into the mix! I have been discerning a vocation between the PCPA and Carmelites. Numerous times I have decided that Carmel was for me and even feel at peace about it. Then the PCPA's pop up again and then its utter confusion and uncertainity. I have talked to both communities, Mother at the Carmelite monastery feels that I should visit the PCPA's out in AZ and the PCPA's feel that I shouldnt enter any community without following ones heart. I am just wondering has anybody else gone through this? i don't know if its a sign from God maybe nudging me toward PCPA or its my own self.

In JMJ[/color]

[Totus Tuus]

I have, kind of. I was discerning with the Daughters of Saint Paul, and I was so torn between active and contemplative life. I know that's a different struggle from what you're going through. But once I realized how much the signs in my life pointed to Olam, and how much I felt at home there, the animocity kind of drifted away.

[jgirl]

I experienced the same thing as Lauren (although between two active communites--one really active and one more contemplative). I thought I was called to the Sisters of St. Francis of the Martyr St. George. I didn't even want to visit the Sister Servants, but the Holy Spirit and my friend were nudging me to visit. I figured that if I knew I was called to one community, then why should I spend the time and money to visit another community? After I visited the SsEWs the first time, I made this pro/con list in my mind of both orders (actually on the phone with my friend ALyssa because we were both discerning the same two communities), and I took it to prayer. When i visited the second time, I knew in my heart that I was called to Alabama, not Alton.

Go visit the PCPAs and go with an open heart. My heart wasn't open when I made the reservations for my first visit, but a week before I left, I went before the Blessed Sacrament in adoration, and I could tell my heart was being pulled toward the Sister Servants before I even met any of the Sisters.

God will lead you where He is calling you if you remain faithful!

Edited October 5, 2005 by jgirl

[Sixtina87]

One yr o had my heart set on the Daughters of S.t Paul, then they requested for me not to discern with them, God way of saying, "NO"!!!! Then i met the Sisters of Nazareth, My heart said "YES", but then when i was on retreat last month, my mind or heart was telling me another, Sadly the FSGM sisters said "NO" too!!!! So its back to the Sisters of Nazareth, and so far everything is so much better, even though my applicaiton process isnt done or started, I know that this is where I'm meant to be!!!!! it jsut that feeling of comfortable you have with the Sisters and jsut staying with them and being with them and so on!!!!!!

[msahara]

[quote name='Sixtina87' date='Oct 4 2005, 11:51 PM']One yr o had my heart set on the Daughters of S.t Paul, then they requested for me not to discern with them, God way of saying, "NO"!!!! Then i met the Sisters of Nazareth, My heart said "YES", but then when i was on retreat last month, my mind or heart was telling me another, Sadly the FSGM sisters said "NO" too!!!! So its back to the Sisters of Nazareth, and so far everything is so much better, even though my applicaiton process isnt done or started, I know that this is where I'm meant to be!!!!! it jsut that feeling of comfortable you have with the Sisters and jsut staying with them and being with them and so on!!!!!!
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so things worked out with the srs. of Nazareth?

[srmarymichael]

[quote name='Marieteresa' date='Oct 4 2005, 09:16 PM'][color=gray]hey folkies,

Just when I have everything figured out a monkey wrench gets through into the mix!  I have been discerning a vocation between the PCPA and Carmelites.  Numerous times I have decided that Carmel was for me and even feel at peace about it.  Then the PCPA's pop up again and then its utter confusion and uncertainity.  I have talked to both communities, Mother at the Carmelite monastery feels that I should visit the PCPA's out in AZ and the PCPA's feel that I shouldnt enter any community without following ones heart.  I am just wondering has anybody else gone through this?  i don't know if its a sign from God maybe nudging me toward PCPA or its my own self.

In JMJ[/color]
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Do you have a Spiritual Director that you trust? When things get confusing, it helps to have a priest or someone like that to talk things through to discern what God is really saying to your heart.

[Nathan]

The Daughters of St. Paul rock. My favorite chain bookstore in Toronto, Pauline Books & Media, is owned and operated by them. I always get a "God bless you" at the checkout.

[zabbazooey]

Awesome

[Marieteresa]

[quote name='srmarymichael' date='Oct 6 2005, 08:11 PM']Do you have a Spiritual Director that you trust?  When things get confusing, it helps to have a priest or someone like that to talk things through to discern what God is really saying to your heart.
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Unfortuntely, both my priest and SD have been extremely busy and I have been unable to meet with any of them. So I do not know what to do about that.

[Philosopher]

[quote name='Marieteresa' date='Oct 8 2005, 04:02 PM']Unfortuntely, both my priest and SD have been extremely busy and I have been unable to meet with any of them.  So I do not know what to do about that.
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That is unfortunate, I hope some time will open up for you. Are there any other free Priests or wise lay people around? (Any other parishes around you?)

If it helps any, I was and still sort of am torn between diocesan and Dominican Priesthood. My inclinations went back and forth between the two, and from time to time still do.

Make sure you visit and pray with each group. Also do a daily self-examination; Read/Think on each order and find what interests you, what may be confusing, and what may turn you off. Then in light of that examine your own drives and ambitions and what kind of work you want.

I will keep your vocation in my intentions tonite, good luck!!!

Edited October 9, 2005 by Philosopher

[Marieteresa]

[quote name='Philosopher' date='Oct 9 2005, 03:03 PM']That is unfortunate, I hope some time will open up for you. Are there any other free Priests or wise lay people around? (Any other parishes around you?)

If it helps any, I was and still sort of am torn between diocesan and Dominican Priesthood. My inclinations went back and forth between the two, and from time to time still do.

Make sure you visit and pray with each group. Also do a daily self-examination; Read/Think on each order and find what interests you, what may be confusing, and what may turn you off. Then in light of that examine your own drives and ambitions and what kind of work you want.

I will keep your vocation in my intentions tonite, good luck!!!
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Thanks for the suggestion, I am sure I am not the only one coming across this problem of finding holy priest. But I know of one priest whom seems very holy...I think I may give him a call tomorrow. One any note I was thinking about a conversation that a friend of mine had online.

There are so many places where one can become a good religious but only one where one could become a saint.

In JMJ

[zabbazooey]

[quote name='Marieteresa' date='Oct 9 2005, 05:38 PM'][snip]
There are so many places where one can become a good religious but only one where one could become a saint.
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Very well said!

[Philosopher]

[quote name='Marieteresa' date='Oct 9 2005, 06:38 PM']There are so many places where one can become a good religious but only one where one could become a saint.
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Mind if I quote you in the future? That is a brilliant line!

[srmarymichael]

[quote name='Marieteresa' date='Oct 9 2005, 06:38 PM']Thanks for the suggestion, I am sure I am not the only one coming across this problem of finding holy priest. 
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My suggestion is to first relax. You don't have to make a decision today.

Secondly, God will tell you when He is ready to tell you. If you do not know for sure which direction to go, then it's probably not time yet. Keep praying, keep close to the Lord, every day trying to do His Will, and when the time is right, God will definitely reveal His Holy Will to you.

We're praying for you!

[MC IMaGiNaZUN]

Marie Teresa...
Are you familiar with [url="http://www.osa-west.org/blessedmariateresafasce.html"]Bl. Maria Theresa Fasce[/url]? She was an Augustinian Nun of this century, just thougt i should share that.

Anyways. One imporant thing, i notice a lot of people neglect is the very nature of decision. A lot of the time, people place so much primacy on God, to the point that God makes the decision for us. That somehow, we do not have a decision in the matter.

I don't believe that is the way God calls us. I believe he leads us, and gives us small signs here and there. But wants us to have the freedom to decide where we belong

Maybe the decision is difficult, and it would be nice for God to open up the heavens and what not, but chances are, God could be leaving that up to you.

Part of such a lofty decision, also involves the sacrifice. If it were not so difficult, it would probably loose much of the seriousness of it all.

And by the way, God loves you, and i am sure he would bless you in whatever decision you make.

SHALOM

[Susan]

"There are so many places where one can become a good religious but only one where one could become a saint."

Are you sure about that? If so then if someone chose the wrong vocation (marriage instead of religious life and the other way around or the "wrong" community) than that would mean that the externals determine holiness.

Maybe it would be HARDER to become a saint if someone were in the "wrong" place but God never stops giving us his grace and holiness is about surrendering and responding to his will in the present moment no matter what the cirumcstances are.

Any one have any thoughts on this?

[passionheart]

[quote name='Susan' date='Oct 10 2005, 03:35 PM']"There are so many places where one can become a good religious but only one where one could become a saint."

Are you sure about that? If so then if someone chose the wrong vocation (marriage instead of religious life and the other way around or the "wrong" community) than that would mean that the externals determine holiness.

Maybe it would be HARDER to become a saint if someone were in the "wrong" place but God never stops giving us his grace and holiness is about surrendering and responding to his will in the present moment no matter what the cirumcstances are.

Any one have any thoughts on this?
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I agree Susan. Our vocations, regardless what they are, are call to life and love. I believe our individual calls are what our Father has decided is best for us to grow in holiness, that is growing in relationship and union with Him.

Now, we do have Free Will and we can accept or reject or just plain miss the boat so the speak in our life. However, that doesn't mean God doesn't have shall we say "Plan B". In other words, God will work with us in the situations of our lifes to us to Himself.

If we have any doubts to what lengths or to how much God loves us, then all we have to do is turn our eyes to the Cross.

Blessings,

DM

[Marieteresa]

That was just my humble opinion...and what I truely believe. I think about the life of Holy Mother Saint Teresa of Avila and what would have happened if she would have choosen to reject Gods call to become a bride of Christ. But decided to marry and have children instead...(there is nothing wrong with a vocation to marriage) But in her own words she felt like if she would have choosen to reject God's call she would have lost her soul. Anyway just taking a look at the lives of the saints i wonder would they become saints if the would have choosen another path.

Your right though God wants us to grow in holiness and to love Him with our whole heart. But I still believe that anywhere one can be a good religious but only one place can one become a saint.

In JMJ

MC IMaGiNaZUN thanks for introducing me to Blessed Maria Terese Fasce

[MC IMaGiNaZUN]

[quote name='Susan' date='Oct 10 2005, 01:35 PM']"There are so many places where one can become a good religious but only one where one could become a saint."

Are you sure about that? If so then if someone chose the wrong vocation (marriage instead of religious life and the other way around or the "wrong" community) than that would mean that the externals determine holiness.

Maybe it would be HARDER to become a saint if someone were in the "wrong" place but God never stops giving us his grace and holiness is about surrendering and responding to his will in the present moment no matter what the cirumcstances are.

Any one have any thoughts on this?
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Let me clarify myself. You did bring up a good point Susan. And you probably have better advice than i do.

What i do want to point out is this. God can, and often does bring good out of bad. And i don't see what can limit God, when we bumble and make mistakes. And as far as i know, we are never perfect enough to make the absolute best decisions.

God knows the heart, and if we mess up, I just have faith that God can bring good from it all...

St. Rita of Cascia wanted with all her heart to be wed to Our Lord. She hung out with the nuns at the Magdellena convent in Cascia. And she had a fervent prayer life, and was very intimate with Jesus. But when her parents refused to let her join the convent, she was forced to marry. God had used that marriage to bring about the conversion of her husband. But upon widowhood, God restored that original dream of hers to be completely his.

But i am too selfish, this conversation is not about me...

Loosing the soul, as quoted by St. Theresa is a good point. That is how i feel about my vocation. I do believe, that if i had just decided to get married, and have kids, God could have blessed me. Indeed, God is very powerful and benevolent. But i know deep down in my heart, that i will not be complete until i find that special place that God has for me. And i do believe that i have found that place.

I just do not believe that God will force us into a position without giving us options. Or coax us into a decision through fear and force. I believe that God inspires in us love and generosity, then we may have the proper disposition to give of ourselves more to him.

SHALOM

[srmarymichael]

[quote name='Susan' date='Oct 10 2005, 02:35 PM']"There are so many places where one can become a good religious but only one where one could become a saint."

Are you sure about that? If so then if someone chose the wrong vocation (marriage instead of religious life and the other way around or the "wrong" community) than that would mean that the externals determine holiness.

Maybe it would be HARDER to become a saint if someone were in the "wrong" place but God never stops giving us his grace and holiness is about surrendering and responding to his will in the present moment no matter what the cirumcstances are.

Any one have any thoughts on this?
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I think that God has a special plan for us in our lives. God's ways are so much higher than we can understand, so we pray and trust that God is leading us to His Holy Will (and thus sainthood) every day if we let Him.

To say that there is "only one where one could become a saint", well, if we said that God has only one convent in the world where I could become a saint, I'd be scared to death that I'd try to enter the wrong place. God seems to have His way of leading us without us having to stress it so much. His Will seems to (especially if we are people of prayer) show up in front of us....if that makes any sense.

If I would've chosen to get married instead of become a Sister, I think I would've regretted it the rest of my life. I pictured myself sitting at church with my husband and children realizing that I chose the wrong vocation and that I should've followed God's Will. I pictured myself there not really happy because I didn't follow the road that God had invited me to.

Also, while I'm teaching or leading Youth Groups, etc., I also think about how these young people never would've met me (if I would have gotten married). I think about how they never would have heard the Gospel from me, they never would have had my influence in their lives.

At the same time, I believe that if I would've gotten married instead of become a Sister (I'm in Final Vows now), that God would have continued inviting me to be holy through that vocation. But I imagine that there would have been a pain in my heart ...an extra suffering...knowing that I didn't follow God's Will.