SMME

[shortnun]

Attention all those who are entering, once thought of entering, know those who have entered, or know a lot about the Dominican Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist....... I have questions about the sisters.

1) Do they cut their hair when they make first profession?

2) Are there home visits like those of Nashville (who I think gets a week at home every three years once temporarily professed)?

3) I thought I had another one, but it seems to have slipped my mind....



If anyone else has questions, put them up here so we can pool our knowledge and give an answer! : (Am I the only one that thinks we need to have nun and sister smilies?)

[Sixtina87]

to answer your questions but i assume they are the same for every community!!!!!!!!!!!!

When one becomes a novice and wears the white veil the hari is cut short enough for the viel to be put on, its kinda like an really ugl;y hari cut, kinda like a grandma hair cut but the top is long, but it depends ont ehc ommunity how short it is cut!!!!!

most communities give you a week for a vist, once a yr but it depends how far you live, for some i knwo tis every 3 yrs you can go home for 3 weeks or a week, not sure!!!!!!!!!!!

No your not the only one who thinks we need a nun or sister simlies!!! i think they would be cute!!!!!!!!!!!

[Andrea348]

[quote name='shortnun' date='Oct 24 2005, 12:43 PM']1) Do they cut their hair when they make first profession?

2) Are there home visits like those of Nashville (who I think gets a week at home every three years once temporarily professed)?
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i am not completely sure about either....but this is what i seem to remember from asking.

1-) yes

2-) as i remember there is a visit toward the end of postulant year.....then i think you skip some years during the novice time, then it was my impression it was a once a year thing......i really don't remember for sure

[Sanvean]

I know they get something like 6 days for a home visit every time they make or renew their vows. Besides that, I believe their family gets to visit them once a year.

[shortnun]

I remembered my third question and came up with a fourth! (I'm very proud of my memory.)

3) I know you have to be free of all debt, but is there a dowry as well? Does that happen when you make first profession or enter postulancy?

4) In reference to home visits and stuff, has anyone ever asked (I haven't, clearly) asked about attending weddings of siblings?

[Andrea348]

[quote name='shortnun' date='Oct 24 2005, 05:43 PM']I remembered my third question and came up with a fourth! (I'm very proud of my memory.)

3) I know you have to be free of all debt, but is there a dowry as well? Does that happen when you make first profession or enter postulancy?

4) In reference to home visits and stuff, has anyone ever asked (I haven't, clearly) asked about attending weddings of siblings?
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3-) SJA did mention that to me that there was a dowry....that was in october 2003.....i don't know if they still do it

[FutureSoror]

I don't remember if there's a dowry or not... but I do have an e-mail where Sr. Joseph Andrew told about how much it costs to enter, all together. I'll see if I can dig it out...

As far a attending weddings, my impression was that the only way that would normally happen is if it's on a home visit.

[shortnun]

[quote name='FutureSoror' date='Oct 24 2005, 07:31 PM']I don't remember if there's a dowry or not... but I do have an e-mail where Sr. Joseph Andrew told about how much it costs to enter, all together.  I'll see if I can dig it out...
[/quote]

That would be cool, thanks. Eventually, when I listen to God more and get my life in order, I will be able to ask SJA all these particulars myself.

PS- Praise and thanksgiving for application papers! How many other girls got them over this retreat? Last October I seem to remember quite a few.

[FutureSoror]

To quote Sr. Joseph Andrew exactly:

"I'm estimating that the TOTAL needed (between physical, dental, psychological, etc., etc. etc. - plus the things you will need to purchase and bring -- plus the dowy -- plus the others....) is possibly around $5000."

I got the impression that someone else besides me got papers, but I'm really not sure.

[benedictaj]

Yup, two girls definitely got their papers - you Futuresoror, and another one (I don't know if she'd want her name posted!) Apparently the Sisters are praying for 23? postulants next year!!!

Hmmm, interesting about the dowry.... does anyone know anything about insurance and so on? I heard something about the novitiate sisters paying for the first three or so years? (like health insurance etc) Does anyone know any more? lol, I know I should be asking Sr JA herself!

About home visits, I had the impression there's a short visit May/June of the postulant year, and then none til Temporary Vows, after which the sister can go home for a week or so every three years. I don't know about weddings etc, either, but I wouldn't imagine so,unlrss, it is during a home visit!

[jgirl]

Usually Sisters don't get to go to weddings of siblings unless charity dictates it. The Sisters of St. Francis of the Martyr St. George can't go to weddings--even if they happen during home visit. You might want to ask the wedding question to Sr. Joseph Andrew.

[AlterDominicus]

[quote name='shortnun' date='Oct 24 2005, 11:43 AM']Attention all those who are entering, once thought of entering, know those who have entered, or know a lot about the Dominican Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist....... I have questions about the sisters.

1) Do they cut their hair when they make first profession?

2) Are there home visits like those of Nashville (who I think gets a week at home every three years once temporarily professed)?

3) I thought I had another one, but it seems to have slipped my mind....
If anyone else has questions, put them up here so we can pool our knowledge and give an answer!  :  (Am I the only one that thinks we need to have nun and sister smilies?)
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Hey I have an idea. Why dont we, type out a questionire thing and send it to the sisters and have them answer our questions.

[Sixtina87]

[quote name='jgirl' date='Oct 24 2005, 10:21 PM']Usually Sisters don't get to go to weddings of siblings unless charity dictates it. The Sisters of St. Francis of the Martyr St. George can't go to weddings--even if they happen during home visit. You might want to ask the wedding question to Sr. Joseph Andrew.
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i thought i depends on the type of wedding whether it was a catholic wedding or not!!!!! well that what I heard from Sister!!!!!

[jgirl]

For Nicole: what order is that? The Carmelites?

To all: When I was discerning the Martyrs and I heard that they don't go to weddings at all...ever and that the Sister Servants would most likely not go to the wedding of a sibling, I thought that would be cruel. Then when i thought about it, I thought about how distracting it might be. Let's say that sometime during the 8 years of initial formation my little sister gets married. I go to her wedding, see her all dressed up, eat beautiful food at the wedding reception and listen to music that I enjoy now, but will have been separated from in the convent. I know that my first thought would be, "Why can't I have this?" Knowing my parents, they would pressure me to stay home, and being in that mindset of thinking "What if..?" could really hurt my own vocation to be the Bride of Christ.

I'm not sure if that's the reason why most Sisters don't go to siblings' weddings, but it's probably why I wouldn't want to go--even if the opportunity was presented to me (not unless my parents were throwing a huge fit)

[alicemary]

In this day and age I think it should be up to the individual sister on whether she should attend a family wedding or not. And if you are entering a convent with the full knowledge of why you are entering, then attending a wedding should not be a temptation. If you can't make it through a mere wedding with doubts, then you probably are not mature enough to make the decision to enter the convent, and there is no insult intended here. Please understand that I am older, so see things differently. One does not leave ones families behind, they will always be an important part of your life. If a convent does not understand that, well, I would not consider them.
Only my ramblings!
alicemary

[zabbazooey]

I understand your point, Alicemary

I think it should be up to Mother Superior on the weddings issue.

[Sixtina87]

[quote name='jgirl' date='Oct 26 2005, 08:54 AM']For Nicole: what order is that? The Carmelites?
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No it wasnt the Carmelites!!!! Lets all remember I grew Up knowing the Martyrs!!!!! I remember a fellow teacher asked a Martyr Sister if she would go to her wedding someday if she were toe ver get married, the Sisters said, Not unless its a catholic Wedding!!!! it has to be a catholic wedding for it to be 100% okay for a religious SIster to go!!!!!

[jgirl]

[quote name='Sixtina87' date='Oct 26 2005, 10:31 AM']No it wasnt  the Carmelites!!!! Lets all remember I grew Up knowing the Martyrs!!!!! I remember a fellow teacher asked a Martyr Sister if she would go to her wedding someday if she were toe ver get married, the Sisters said, Not unless its a catholic Wedding!!!! it has to be a catholic wedding for it to be 100% okay for a religious SIster to go!!!!!
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When we were at their vocation retreat in 2004, they had a panel. It was quite possibly the longest q & a panel ever. One girl asked about weddings, and the Sisters said that they couldn't go to weddings (no exceptions--whether they are Catholic or not), but they could possibly go to a sibling's ordination. It would be interesting to see if my friend Alyssa will be able to go to her sister's first profession in Ann Arbor or if Sr. Ann-Marie could come down for Alyssa's. (probably not because of the dates because the SMME professions overlap the Martyrs' retreat)

We also found out that the Sisters can shave their legs, that they don't watch movies in movie theatres, that they can have any color towels and lots of things that are ultimately not important.

If you're going to ask Sr. Joseph Andrew, make sure your questions are appropriate. You may be curious, but it might be better to stay curious on certain things. The dowry/cost question is a good one. Home visits and weddings are good questions (but shouldn't make or break your decision). Don't ask the frivolous questions.

[jgirl]

[quote name='alicemary' date='Oct 26 2005, 08:54 AM']In this day and age I think it should be up to the individual sister on whether she should attend a family wedding or not. And if you are entering a convent with the full knowledge of why you are entering, then attending a wedding should not be a temptation. If you can't make it through a mere wedding with doubts, then you probably are not mature enough to make the decision to enter the convent, and there is no insult intended here. Please understand that I am older, so see things differently.    One does not leave ones families behind, they will always be an important part of your life. If a convent does not understand that, well, I would not consider them.
Only my ramblings!
alicemary
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Let me clarify; I could probably withstand the temptation of the pretty dress and dad giving me away. The problem is my mother. I love her to death, but I know what she would do to get me back once I enter the convent. She says she's supportive of my vocation, but she's given me every excuse as to why I shouldn't enter.

Maturity isn't the issue either. It was when I wanted to base my decision on the home visit factor. If one lives close to Alton (which I do) the home visit years are split up 5 days one year, 5 days the next, and then 4 days. I didn't realize until I met the community that I am called to join that home visits don't matter. My order doesn't have set home visits like other active orders because of the parent factor (I will be able to go home if somebody is seriosuly ill or dying). As I matured in my decision, I realized that this is my new family. I won't forget about my blood family, and I would love to go to my little sister's wedding if she wasn't religious (I think she might have a vocation, too, so this could be a moot point).

It should be a choice left up to one's Superiors. They are pretty good at looking at all the circumstances and choosing whether to offer it.

[shortnun]

[quote name='jgirl' date='Oct 26 2005, 02:08 PM']We also found out that the Sisters can shave their legs....

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Oh that's it. If I am a sister, I am not shaving my legs. Ankle length habits are good for hiding hairy legs. Think about the money the community could save not having to buy razors......

I had heard about the Martyr's guidelines for marriage, so I did want to know how (if at all) SMME differed. I may still bring that question forward to Sr JA for clarification. (And the dowry question too.)


In other news.......... did anyone who went on the retreat see the new Motherhouse? Is all the construction finally finished?