catholicinsd Posted January 23, 2006 Author Posted January 23, 2006 (edited) It had been y ear since his ordaination. And Father Raymond (formerly Jack) ans Sister Lucy (Anne) both felt called to the leave monasteries and evangelize Saudi Arabia, although they told no-one. Edited January 23, 2006 by catholicinsd
Sojourner Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 [quote name='Socrates' date='Jan 22 2006, 05:16 PM']Just at that moment, a hot babe in spike heels and a wet t-shirt strode into the room, acompanied by a large muppet. She pulled a revolver, cocked it and pointed it at Socrates' head. "Hold it right there!" she said. "But Sojourner, I though you were on our side!" exclaimed Socrates. "Think again, fool!" said Sojourner. "It's time you got your just deserts, Conservative Scum!" said the Muppet. "hot stuff, it's time I find out once and for all who's pulling your strings!" said Socrates. "Silence, fool!" cried Sojourner, kicking Socrates in the groin. "Come, Cow of Shame, finish them off!" [right][snapback]863436[/snapback][/right] [/quote] Let's just take a small break from the story-telling to address this intriguing addition from our friend Socrates. Soc, I'm not a fan of the way you've portrayed me here, particularly with the heels/wet t-shirt combo. There's a line, and this crosses it. I don't appreciate being objectified in this way. I find it inappropriate and offensive. It also seems from this story that you feel as though I've betrayed you in some way and attacked you in a very personal manner. I may be reading too much into your little vignette here, but if that's the case I'd much prefer that you handle such personal issues in a less public fashion. I'm easily accessible via e-mail or personal message. That is all. Please resume your regularly scheduled story.
avemaria40 Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 The problem was, they couldn't get visas into Saudi Arabia and might have to enter illegally. They also knew it would be dangerous
Cow of Shame Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 (edited) Obviously a little sticking point such as 'legality' wouldn't stop a long-time weed smoker like Jack Danger Gauph. Yes, [i]danger[/i] was his middle name! (What Jack didn't know was that Anne was secretly spiking his rolling paper with LSD. It didn't help any that he'd started watching old Dallas reruns, either. He'd lost entire [i]weeks[/i] that way.) Jack approached his dealer, "Hey Carl, do you know someone who might be able to hook me up with a fake ID?" Carl eyed him, "You're already 21, aren't you? What'd ya need a fake ID for?" "Well, more like a passport, really. I've got about $600 for me & the lady here," "Where you goin, eh?" Carl shifted nervously. He hated it when the rubes took too long on a deal. "Saudi Arabia. We've got to..." Jack started "Whoah, whoah whoah, man. I ain't helping no Taliban. You can get your passport someplace else." He said, backing away. "We're not....hey! Look...c'mon, I just need..." Jack whined. "Look, go see Mickey on Storbor Street, above the tattoo parlor. If you check out, he can help you out. I gotta go man," Carl said impatiently, scanning the street for cops. "Now buy or get lost," "Fine, fine. I'll take an ounce," Jack pocketed the bag, grabbed Anne and headed for Storbor Street. Edited January 23, 2006 by Cow of Shame
avemaria40 Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 (edited) But Jack didn't give up on the passport, in fact, he was able to buy the pass ports for Saudi Arabia and they departed. They left the airport and landed, presenting their passports. once there, they went into hiding and used lots of euphemisms to convert ppl to Catholicism. Many people did convert and it looked like the country's religion might change from Islam to Catholicism But then, the lemurs showed up again and it looked like no matter if they had habits, they would never beat the Giant Space Lemurs Edited January 23, 2006 by avemaria40
Norseman82 Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 [quote name='Sojourner' date='Jan 22 2006, 10:54 PM']Let's just take a small break from the story-telling to address this intriguing addition from our friend Socrates. Soc, I'm not a fan of the way you've portrayed me here, particularly with the heels/wet t-shirt combo. There's a line, and this crosses it. I don't appreciate being objectified in this way. I find it inappropriate and offensive. It also seems from this story that you feel as though I've betrayed you in some way and attacked you in a very personal manner. I may be reading too much into your little vignette here, but if that's the case I'd much prefer that you handle such personal issues in a less public fashion. I'm easily accessible via e-mail or personal message. That is all. Please resume your regularly scheduled story. [right][snapback]863676[/snapback][/right] [/quote] Ditto regarding priests walking the streets buying pot.
Cow of Shame Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 (edited) [quote name='Norseman82' date='Jan 23 2006, 12:53 PM']Ditto regarding priests walking the streets buying pot. [right][snapback]863997[/snapback][/right] [/quote] OOC: I wasn't the one who introduced marijuana into the story. I'm only working with what was handed to me.... Besides, you know there are priests who smoke some weed. They [i]shouldn't[/i], but odds says they exist. No doubt Jack has a problem with glaucoma. edit: Why, [i]you[/i] threw it in the story stew! lol C'mon, don't be lazy. You could easily turn it into a story of redemption. Those are the most captivating anyway. Although, simply saying, "He beat his addiction and swore never to even look at a joint again. Jack then saved 10 babies, beat hunger in Africa, and made clothes for 20 homeless families" kind of kills the story. Massive time compression for no good reason is boring. Edited January 23, 2006 by Cow of Shame
Norseman82 Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 [quote name='Cow of Shame' date='Jan 23 2006, 10:57 AM']OOC: I wasn't the one who introduced marijuana into the story. I'm only working with what was handed to me.... Besides, you know there are priests who smoke some weed. They [i]shouldn't[/i], but odds says they exist. No doubt Jack has a problem with glaucoma. edit: Why, [i]you[/i] threw it in the story stew! lol [right][snapback]864003[/snapback][/right] [/quote] Actually, my lone reference was in response to the earlier reference and attempted to portray him as a victim of secondhand smoke.
catholicinsd Posted January 23, 2006 Author Posted January 23, 2006 Back to the story. Sister Lucy & Father Raymond unable to get into Saudi Arabia, set their sights on Communist China.
Pig of Intrigue Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 [quote name='catholicinsd' date='Jan 23 2006, 01:08 PM']Back to the story. Sister Lucy & Father Raymond unable to get into Saudi Arabia, set their sights on Communist China. [right][snapback]864059[/snapback][/right] [/quote] But Jack and Anne were determined to find a way into Saudi country. Perhaps with the proper disguises, they thought, they could sneak in undetected.
catholicinsd Posted January 23, 2006 Author Posted January 23, 2006 (As they have now entered into their vocation, Jack & Anne now have new names.) So, Father Raymond & Sister Lucy received permission to leave from their superiors. They then bought a boat and adjusted their habits to look like Saudi lay people.
avemaria40 Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 They were then taken in by a family who was outwardly Muslim but really wanted to be Catholic. Sister Lucy had accidently left her rosary peaking out of the habit she was wearing, and the family felt safe telling them about their desire to be Catholic. Relieved, Sister Lucy and Father Raymond started catechizing the family.
Cow of Shame Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 (edited) Casting off from the pier, Fr. Raymond Danger and Sister Lucy "Shake It" Pole enjoyed the early morning sun. "Looks like we'll have fine weather, Lu," Fr. Raymond called up to Lucy. "I imagine we'll get there in a matter of days." "I'm a little scared to be crossing the Atlantic by ourselves," Lucy admitted. "I'm sure we'll manage fine. We'll be landing in Morocco before you know it!" Raymond chuckled. Lucy gasped in surprise. "Morocco?! I thought we were going to Saudi Arabia!" "Oh, Rayray!" She looked up at him with teary eyes, "I don't [i]know[/i] Moroccanese!" "Don't worry, Lu. I learned the universal language of pig latin. I've got us covered." Raymond smiled comfortingly. A strong wind to their backs, their small vessel gaily rushed through the deepening waters. With Lucy at the helm, Raymond explored the ship. Standing on the prow, he let the wind ruffle his shiny blone hair. "I'm king of the world!" bellowed Jack....I mean, Fr. Raymond. "Rayray! I'm getting hungry!" Lucy yelled over the wind. "Let's go and rustle up some grub," Raymond suggested. As they enjoyed their dinner, Raymond & Lucy were startled from their conversation on lemurs by a sudden jolt running through the boat. Smoke began filling the cabin as they heard the engine rev oddly, cough, and die. The emergency lighting added barely enough light for them to make their way to the stairs. They heard a roar as the small kitchen went up in flames behind them. "Quick! Get the life jackets!" ordered Raymond "The life jackets? Those orange vesty-thingies? I took threw them on the pier so we'd have plenty of room for pamphlets on natural family planning and rosaries." cried Lucy. As the cabin windows exploded behind them, glass fragments flew everywhere. Fr. Raymond quickly shoved Lucy overboard. Coming up gasping, Lucy looked around desperately for Fr. Raymond. "Jack! Jack!" she managed to scream, shivering in the icy water. Edited January 23, 2006 by Cow of Shame
avemaria40 Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 Then, they woke up from the Titanic dream they were having, (second hand marijuana still impacting Fr. Ray) and had tea with this family. Getting out his holy water, Fr. Ray baptises the family. Everything starts to be wonderful, that is, until Saudi authorities capture them and put them and the family in prison for spreading the Catholic faith.
Cow of Shame Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 (edited) Jerking out of her hypothermic stupor, Lucy coughed out the seawater she had swallowed, and again called out for Fr. Raymond. She [i]must[/i] stay awake! Her arms and legs were definitely starting to go numb. Edited January 23, 2006 by Cow of Shame
Guest Rick777 Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 (edited) Then they both wake up next to each other in the hospital. Jack and Anne are informed that they have been in a major car accident and didnt make it to thier prom. Edited January 23, 2006 by Rick777
Guest Rick777 Posted January 23, 2006 Posted January 23, 2006 (edited) Anne faints and Jack is speechless. He tries to get up but he cant move his legs, he screams. Through tears his parents tell him he will never walk again. He asks about Anne.....she doesnt have much longer to live, her health is failing and her initial shock may speed her death. Jack faints...he wakes up but sees nothing but blackness, he cries for help. Suddenly a warm feeling comes over him and he sees Anne more radiant than ever. She is dressed in a beautiful gown, whiter than snow, on top her head is a crown adorned with heavenly gems and jewels. "Jack, you know your vocation in life already, always know that I will help you whenever you struggle. We will see each other in Heaven." He wakes up and its morning. The suns rays peak through the hospital shades. Edited January 23, 2006 by Rick777
catholicinsd Posted January 23, 2006 Author Posted January 23, 2006 "No!" Jack shouted alound, "If you die I coming with you!" In the next room Annee lay unconsious, although in estascy, her soul speeching to Jack. "Please! I wanna see Anne." Jack cried. So Jack's bed was wheeled in with Anne's.
Norseman82 Posted January 24, 2006 Posted January 24, 2006 "Anne!!!!" Anne woke up..."The ship? Out of danger?" "You saved the ship...you saved all of us..." "The needs of the many..." "Outweigh the needs of the few" "...or the one" Anne managed some last gasps "I have been....and shall always be.....your friend....." and closed her eyes. Jack slumped and cried. The doctors and nurses were touched to the point of tears themselves, until the hospital chaplain exclaimed...."She's not dead.....don't you get it? They're practicing for their school play....the final scene from 'The Wrath of Khan'"!!!!!
catholicinsd Posted January 24, 2006 Author Posted January 24, 2006 Everybody in the room with the notable execption of Jack & Anne looked at the chaplin like he was a crazy person.
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