Lil Red Posted October 16, 2007 Posted October 16, 2007 [quote name='prose' post='1403362' date='Oct 15 2007, 09:15 PM']one wedding I knew, the girl invited me to her Jack and Jill, asked for money, but never even invited me to her actual wedding [/quote] classy!
littleflower+JMJ Posted October 16, 2007 Posted October 16, 2007 [quote name='prose' post='1403090' date='Oct 15 2007, 04:45 PM']I think dollar dances can be tacky. They are not the norm for around here. But if I could have gotten away with it, I would have. I know people who have had "Jack and Jill" parties to help fund weddings. Basically a fundraiser party. I don't know how I feel about that either.[/quote] A Dollar dance is NOT tacky..in fact I think its the best part of the wedding dance!!! lol Its such a special and tons of fun dance to have with the ppl your sharing the day with. Its the time to say your goodbyes and best wishes to the couple before they go. Not to mention, there has been weddings when couples walk away with over a thousand dollars to take on their honeymoon afterwards from the dance....Yay!! But again, its part of our culture down here so its blast and the norm. [quote name='Raphael' post='1403205' date='Oct 15 2007, 07:40 PM']Ah, you see, but in my culture, it is tacky to ask for money.[/quote] Well see thats the difference. Ours isn't tacky because we don't really have to ask. Like tina said...its part of our culture already that those close and supportive of the couple will be pouring in monetary help in whatever way for the wedding so its completely different. Its pretty neat because we recognize them back for it too on the wedding day in a big special way. So the day is not just about the couple too. I love hispanic weddings....their awesome! But I'm biased
photosynthesis Posted October 16, 2007 Posted October 16, 2007 [quote name='prose' post='1403090' date='Oct 15 2007, 05:45 PM']I think dollar dances can be tacky. They are not the norm for around here.[/quote] What's a dollar dance? [quote name='Raphael' post='1403232' date='Oct 15 2007, 09:31 PM']Well, yeah, we've pretty much gotten it as cheap as we can...the food is $30 for every 12-16 people, the photographer is a friend of the matron of honor, the cake is being made by a cousin of the bride who's a baker, the honeymoon was going to be on discount with a company my mother works for, but we went with something even cheaper, lol, and someone (a phatmasser) offered to donate the groomsman's gifts to the wedding party. Basically, we've done the best we could. Oh, and the reception hall is free.[/quote] !!!! Sounds like God is providing for you like crazy. How on earth did you find catering that cheap? and a free reception hall? How does that work? Adt6247 initially wanted a potluck wedding. I was OK with it, I guess, except I didn't like the idea of not knowing how many people would show up and not knowing whether there will be enough food for everyone. Planning a wedding is stressful enough and I'd go crazy if I had to coordinate a potluck too! But a potluck wedding was something my betrothed really wanted, so I suggested it to my mom, who then responded "I'd rather take a home equity loan to pay for a big fancy wedding than let you two have a potluck." Since traditionally the Bride's parents pay for such things, we let my mom pay for the reception and decided to pay for everything else i.e. transportation, photography, ceremony music, reception music, flowers, the rings, the clothes, etc. It's hard to imagine that the average New Jersey wedding is $30,000 and now we're figuring out why! My mom's now putting a lot of pressure on me to hire a photographer right away without shopping around for a good deal, which is annoying because she's not paying for it. Argh! And now she's insisting that we invite every single out-of-town guest to the rehearsal dinner, which means that's another 75 people we'll have to pay for twice.
kateri05 Posted October 16, 2007 Posted October 16, 2007 [quote]ne wedding I knew, the girl invited me to her Jack and Jill, asked for money, but never even invited me to her actual wedding idontknow.gif rolleyes.gif classy![/quote] yea, some people need a clue i was invited to a shower AND bachelorette party (where gifts were given) for a wedding i wasn't invited to. TAC-TASTIC (and ps. i didn't go, because i felt uncomfortable spending lots of money on gifts when i knew i wasn't invited to the wedding. i felt used.) yay micah!! did you pray to st. rita?? she always comes through!
MissScripture Posted October 16, 2007 Posted October 16, 2007 [quote name='Dreamweaver' post='1403225' date='Oct 15 2007, 08:23 PM']Dollar dances are common among us in the upper Midwest too. I don't see how they can be tacky! Garter auctions are tacky though, and a bit creepy when the father of the bride wins the garter. I guess it would be creepy no matter who bought it (besides the husband!) Ask around to see if you have any family or friends that can help out in anyway? Maybe you have an aunt that can do hair for the women? Some of my fiances' relatives helped his cousin with arranging flowers and boutonnières, and it looked very nice and saved hundreds of dollars.[/quote] At my brother's weddding, they didn't auction the garter, they just threw it --well, shot it like a rubber band, really, and the guy who caught the garter danced with the girl who caught the boquet. [quote name='prose' post='1403362' date='Oct 15 2007, 11:15 PM']Basically, it is like a bridal shower, but all of the bride and groom's friends are invited, and it is a "fundraiser". They do things like dollar raffles, and silent auctions, some even charge a cover charge for the event. It is popular in some regions. Again, I am REALLY uncomfortable with anything asking for money. One wedding I knew, the girl invited me to her Jack and Jill, asked for money, but never even invited me to her actual wedding [/quote] Oh...wow...That IS tacky!
photosynthesis Posted October 16, 2007 Posted October 16, 2007 [quote name='kateri05' post='1403470' date='Oct 16 2007, 02:28 AM']yea, some people need a clue i was invited to a shower AND bachelorette party (where gifts were given) for a wedding i wasn't invited to. TAC-TASTIC (and ps. i didn't go, because i felt uncomfortable spending lots of money on gifts when i knew i wasn't invited to the wedding. i felt used.) yay micah!! did you pray to st. rita?? she always comes through! [/quote] wow, that is super tacky. I wouldn't want to put my friends through that. I'm having a traditional bridal shower which is just for women invited to the wedding, and there will be presents, cheesy games and the standard bridal shower fare. But then the women in my prayer community are throwing me a prayer shower, which is basically going to be a big sleepover. Instead of bringing gifts, usually you just bring a plate of food and a letter of affirmation for the bride. Then the bride gets prayed over and we party all night. It's a lot better than a bachelorette party!
jmjtina Posted October 17, 2007 Posted October 17, 2007 [quote name='Raphael' post='1403205' date='Oct 15 2007, 05:40 PM']Ah, you see, but in my culture, it is tacky to ask for money.[/quote] Don't worry about it. Just because a bunch of Mexican traditions freak you out doesn't mean ya'll are normal to us either. The feelings are mutual. Trust me.
Thy Geekdom Come Posted October 17, 2007 Author Posted October 17, 2007 [quote name='jmjtina' post='1403898' date='Oct 16 2007, 10:06 PM']Don't worry about it. Just because a bunch of Mexican traditions freak you out doesn't mean ya'll are normal to us either. The feelings are mutual. Trust me. [/quote] Okay, so the housekeeper at my parish is Guatemalan and she hates Mexicans...and it confuses the heck out of all the white people here.
littleflower+JMJ Posted October 17, 2007 Posted October 17, 2007 [quote name='Raphael' post='1403967' date='Oct 16 2007, 10:48 PM']Okay, so the housekeeper at my parish is Guatemalan and she hates Mexicans...and it confuses the heck out of all the white people here. [/quote] its probably because shes tired of ppl assuming shes mexican and thinking all latin america is the same i think whats most confusing is you in this thread!! :
kateri05 Posted October 17, 2007 Posted October 17, 2007 [quote]there will be presents, cheesy games and the standard bridal shower fare.[/quote] oh those are so fun mine was like this and i LOVED IT. some people think those games are lame, but i say lame is awesome cool activity: during the part that's boring for everyone else (ie you opening gifts ), my aunt gave everyone there a penny, each with a different year on it. then she drew a penny from a bowl with corresponding pennies in it (or you could draw names) and they had to tell a favorite Lina story, or how they met me, or something funny they remembered from when i was little. i hadn't heard like half the stories, it was so much fun!
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