145 replies to this topic

[dUSt]

I know marriage is a vocation, but this board is for phuture nuns and priests.
I know the name is "Vocation Station", but if you read the fine print under the description, it specifically indicates religious life.
Being married is great, but this board was created to foster and encourage religious vocations, which is a superior calling.

Thanks.

If you don't like it, then leave and go find a spouse who cares about your feelings.

[Francis Clare]

Sorry about my posts. I'm here to encourage others to the vocation of religious life which I once had. Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa.

[dUSt]

Sorry about my posts. I'm here to encourage others to the vocation of religious life which I once had. Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa.

No reason to apologize. The name is confusing, but I choose to keep it because it's catchy. So, my bad. I'm just clarifying some stuff, that's all. I love you.

[beatitude]

As the small print states 'it's a party for all you priest and nun wannabes', I guess that's me out too. I'm joining a secular institute.

I will continue to read the phorum occasionally and to pray for you all.

[Totus Tuus]

I thought this thread was a joke. Unfortunately I'm wrong...

[MissScripture]

Just because you're married or not looking to join religious life/priesthood does not mean you can't post in here. However, the focus of threads should not be marriage. It's not because marriage is not a vocation or not important. It's just a lot easier to find people in the world to talk about marriage with, even with the specification of holy, Catholic marriages. It's not so easy for people to find others to connect with in regards to religious life/priesthood. This doesn't mean that marriage cannot be mentioned, since there does sometimes need to be something said about marriage to balance out views of vocations. However, again, the focus of threads in Vocation Station should not be on marriage.

[Totus Tuus]

Just because you're married or not looking to join religious life/priesthood does not mean you can't post in here. However, the focus of threads should not be marriage.

I understood the post and I have no intention of not posting in here anymore. I was in religious life so I actually have some things to say that dUST would want me to say. However, I don't think it's right to call a forum "vocation station" and not really have it be a vocation place, but a place to talk about one specific vocation. That's misleading, and most people probably don't read the fine print. Second of all, the amount of talk in here about marriage is probably less than 10% of the total conversation, and usually it's initiated by someone who's discerning religious life and wants to know about other vocations. I was starting to think that VS was becoming a healthier place by becoming slightly more focused on the fact that there is more than one vocation for people to choose, but apparently that was never the direction this forum was meant to go in. So where's the forum for people to talk about marriage as a vocation, if they're not allowed to do it in "vocation" station? I sure as heck don't want a fourteen year old reading the NFP forum. So what's their alternative?

[FutureCarmeliteClaire]

I agree.

[dUSt]

So what's their alternative?

Open Mic. There are lots of married people in Open Mic that give excellent advice, and most of them don't come into the Vocation Station, because, umm... they're already married.

[MIkolbe]

I understood the post and I have no intention of not posting in here anymore. I was in religious life so I actually have some things to say that dUST would want me to say. However, I don't think it's right to call a forum "vocation station" and not really have it be a vocation place, but a place to talk about one specific vocation. That's misleading, and most people probably don't read the fine print. Second of all, the amount of talk in here about marriage is probably less than 10% of the total conversation, and usually it's initiated by someone who's discerning religious life and wants to know about other vocations. I was starting to think that VS was becoming a healthier place by becoming slightly more focused on the fact that there is more than one vocation for people to choose, but apparently that was never the direction this forum was meant to go in. So where's the forum for people to talk about marriage as a vocation, if they're not allowed to do it in "vocation" station? I sure as heck don't want a fourteen year old reading the NFP forum. So what's their alternative?

Instead of being a part of the problem by complaining, be part of the solution by thinking and suggesting an alternative. dUSt is a pretty open guy and though I cannot garuantee action; I can garuantee he will be open and listen.

Unless you *like* to complain......

[MissyP89]

Can we have a marriage board, then?

Call it Love Connection. It'll be epic.

In all seriousness, I understand what you're aiming for, dUSt. It would be good to have something for the wannabe-marrieds, if we are holding VS up as for the discerning only.

[dUSt]

Can we have a marriage board, then?

Call it Love Connection. It'll be epic.

In all seriousness, I understand what you're aiming for, dUSt. It would be good to have something for the wannabe-marrieds, if we are holding VS up as for the discerning only.

We do have that board. Open Mic.
I don't think a board specifically to talk about marriage would get more than a few threads.

[dUSt]

And I'm not trying to be a jerk about all this, I'm just trying to keep this board focused on what the church teaches is a higher calling than marriage.

Pope John Paul II , Vita Consecrata, no. 32: “As a way of showing forth the Church's holiness, it is to be recognized that the consecrated life, which mirrors Christ's own way of life, has an objective superiority. Precisely for this reason, it is an especially rich manifestation of Gospel values and a more complete expression of the Church's purpose, which is the sanctification of humanity. The consecrated life proclaims and in a certain way anticipates the future age, when the fullness of the Kingdom of Heaven, already present in its first fruits and in mystery,[62] will be achieved and when the children of the resurrection will take neither wife nor husband, but will be like the angels of God (cf. Mt. 22:30)”

Pope Pius XII, Sacra Virginitas, no. 32: “This doctrine of the excellence of virginity and of celibacy and of their superiority over the married state was, as we have already said, revealed by our Divine Redeemer and by the Apostle of the Gentiles; so too, it was solemnly defined as a dogma of divine faith by the holy council of Trent, and explained in the same way by all the holy Fathers and Doctors of the Church."

Council of Trent, pg. 225: "If anyone saith that the marriage state is to be preferred before the state of virginity, let him be anathema." [...] "writing to the Corinthians, [Paul] says: I would that all men were even as myself; that is, that all embrace the virtue of continence...A life of continence is to be desired by all.”

Catechism of the Catholic Church, p. 916: "The state of the consecrated life is thus one way of experiencing a "more intimate" consecration, rooted in Baptism and dedicated totally to God. In the consecrated life, Christ's faithful, moved by the Holy Spirit, propose to follow Christ more nearly, to give themselves to God who is loved above all and, pursuing the perfection of charity in the service of the Kingdom, to signify and proclaim in the Church the glory of the world to come."

[beatitude]

Vocational discernment doesn't happen in a vacuum. Often someone's discernment to a religious community can be very enriched by hearing stories of people's discernment to married life. Knowledge of the one can deepen appreciation for the other. Like Totus Tuus, I also appreciated the fact that this phorum was containing a bit more info on marriage - it seemed like a beautiful testament to the nature of the universal church. An understanding of that should be fundamental to anyone's discernment. It certainly doesn't hurt the religious discerners to have a few threads on married life in here.

I know you are not trying to be a jerk, but it does feel as though you are imposing your opinion of what religious discernment ought to look like. As you are a married man yourself, that seems a bit strange - unless you've been a vocation director yourself at one time, or had a lot experience with leading a parish discernment group, and you found this way to be best through experience.

[homeschoolmom]

We do have that board. Open Mic.
I don't think a board specifically to talk about marriage would get more than a few threads.

I actually think that Raising Small Humans is the better alternative to VS for marriage posts. While the phocus of that board (RSH) is mostly children/NFP, I don't see why it can't be broadened to include marriage in general. Open Mic, to me, is not as "safe" a place to post serious questions about married life. I do feel that RSH is, though).

I think anyone who wishes to discuss and encourage religious vocations ought to feel welcome to post here-- not just those who are, themselves, discerning.

[Lil Red]

Vocational discernment doesn't happen in a vacuum. Often someone's discernment to a religious community can be very enriched by hearing stories of people's discernment to married life. Knowledge of the one can deepen appreciation for the other.

which people can do by reading other areas of the phorum...like open mic and "Raising Small Humans" phorum.

unfortunately, many VS'ers tend to be stick just the VS and not venture to other parts of the phorum...so much so that there are posters who have a lot of posts who i have never even seen in any other part of the phorums.

[dUSt]

I know you are not trying to be a jerk, but it does feel as though you are imposing your opinion of what religious discernment ought to look like. As you are a married man yourself, that seems a bit strange - unless you've been a vocation director yourself at one time, or had a lot experience with leading a parish discernment group, and you found this way to be best through experience.

I have no experience at vocation directing, but I have a tremendous amount of experience at organizing message boards into focused topics. Anyone who has access to the Vocation Station has access to the rest of the phorum, so if they are in a vacuum, it's because they are choosing to stay in the vacuum.

[maximillion]

I agree with beatitude ( and others).
1) Talk of marriage on VS has never ever in any way shape or form 'upset' me, nor can I see this talk being potentially upsetting to anyone else.
2) Everything in life is relative. I personally would be unhappy if marriage were not to be able to be talked about here on VS, It too is a vocation. I have never noticed posts talking MORE about marriage than they do about Life in Religion, but alongside, which IMO is just fine.
3) Exclusivity tends to breed attitudes of discontent, separation, and alienation in every place I have seen it. Please don't introduce it here on VS or phatmass....
4) I am an ex-nun. I am not discerning anything beyond the Lord's Will in my daily life. I am single and celibate. Does this mean I am not supposed to post here in VS? I am neither a priest or nun wannabe......

[Lil Red]

3) Exclusivity tends to breed attitudes of discontent, separation, and alienation in every place I have seen it. Please don't introduce it here on VS or phatmass....

sorry but 'exclusivity' is already on VS. many VS'ers tend to exclude themselves from the rest of the phorums....

[dUSt]

OK, once again, my lack of communication skills has gotten me in trouble.

I have changed the name of this thread from "Don't talk about marriage in here" to "Don't start threads focusing on marriage in here."

I assumed you guys would know that you could still talk about marriage when discussing religious vocations (because it would be impossible not to). I just didn't want there to be threads that were started that focus on marriage. What I want to avoid is the thought that a vocation to marriage is somehow equal to a religious vocation--it is not. A vocation to the religious life is superior. That's all. Talk about marriage--that's fine. But if you want to focus on marriage as a vocation, start a thread in Open Mic or the Raising Small Humans board.