LadyOfSorrows Posted December 29, 2011 Share Posted December 29, 2011 I love the Church and religious vocations, but there NEEDS to be a greater emphasis on marriage. Maybe we would have many more holier ones in the church-- there is a terrible lack of them. I know dUst didn't mean to offend anyone, but it just hurts even more to see how neglected marriage can be. The sacrifices of marriage are just as purifying as those in the religious life. I just wish it was given equal attention. It really is not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dUSt Posted December 29, 2011 Author Share Posted December 29, 2011 I don't understand what I could have done differently without making anybody mad. I want this to be a board that focuses on priesthood and religious life, because I think the church has placed great importance on that. "The Vocation Station" has already been referred to by name in many articles, blogs, radio interviews, etc, so I don't think it would be a good idea to change it. I'm honestly at a loss. I hope you all can forgive my lack of better leadership in this situation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AccountDeleted Posted December 29, 2011 Share Posted December 29, 2011 [quote name='dUSt' timestamp='1325138753' post='2359183'] I don't understand what I could have done differently without making anybody mad. I want this to be a board that focuses on priesthood and religious life, because I think the church has placed great importance on that. "The Vocation Station"has already been referred to by name in many articles, blogs, radio interviews, etc, so I don't think it would be a good idea to change it. I'm honestly at a loss. I hope you all can forgive my lack of better leadership in this situation. [/quote] I strongly object to the idea that you might have done something wrong in this situation. I have been posting on VS since 2007 and the focus has always been on religious life and this is where many people have come to discern their religious vocation. That was its purpose and it fills that purpose. Lately it has lost focus a little and marriage has become a high profile topic. I, for one, am glad that you noticed this and made a VERY SIMPLE request not to START threads that FOCUS on marriage. dUSt, you never said anything about stopping others from posting here or mentioning marriage in a thread, and you even suggested that people post in Open Mic to discuss marriage. I simply don't understand the high level of emotion that seems to have run rampant through this thread. I know that you tried to make it lighthearted by saying to take complaints to one's spouse but the fact is that you really want this thread to be an aide to discernment of religious life. I haven't always agreed with things you have done or said on phatmass, dUSt, but I have never felt that it was a leadership issue, merely one of opinions. Sure, I'm glad I agree with you in this instance, but that isn't the point. You have a purpose and intention for this phorum, and it's your website. Heck, not everyone agrees with all the rules of the Church, but they should at least know who calls the shots!! This truly is a storm in a teacup and a little less emotionalism and more maturity wouldn't go amiss here now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strictlyinkblot Posted December 29, 2011 Share Posted December 29, 2011 May I respectfully suggest we stop and pray for each other. Looking over the thread it seems that this discussion has gone far beyond what was initially intended. Dust, I understand what you're trying to do. Maybe at a later stage you can ask people to put up suggestions for sub boards and maybe even a poll. At the moment I think emotions are a little too high. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AccountDeleted Posted December 29, 2011 Share Posted December 29, 2011 By the way dUST, when you started posting the slogan from Proverbs, 'haters gona hate', I got offended (dont' ask me why) and left phatmass for awhile to chill out. When I came back, I actually found myself using that very same phrase because it just seemed so appropriate to a situation! Maybe some posters need to take a break, get some perspective and then come back again. It helps. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AccountDeleted Posted December 29, 2011 Share Posted December 29, 2011 [quote name='Strictlyinkblot' timestamp='1325139498' post='2359189'] May I respectfully suggest we stop and pray for each other. Looking over the thread it seems that this discussion has gone far beyond what was initially intended. Dust, I understand what you're trying to do. Maybe at a later stage you can ask people to put up suggestions for sub boards and maybe even a poll. At the moment I think emotions are a little too high. [/quote] Yes, good time for prayers for all of us. Thanks for that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dUSt Posted December 29, 2011 Author Share Posted December 29, 2011 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AccountDeleted Posted December 29, 2011 Share Posted December 29, 2011 [quote name='dUSt' timestamp='1325139869' post='2359194'] [/quote] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhuturePriest Posted December 29, 2011 Share Posted December 29, 2011 (edited) Dust, I think you handled this situation very well, and I think your post was not offensive at all. Marriage is a very important vocation, yes, but it's the most popular, because over the last hundred years or so, there has been more emphasis on marriage than Religious vocations, and this has led some people to believe that Religious life is boring, unnecessary, and a place of great mental torment. I remember a very wonderful Sister near me saying that when she told her parents that she wanted to be a Sister, they had acted like she would never be happy again in her life, and that it was a dreadful fate indeed. And sadly, this is a very common occurrence. We need more emphasis on Religious vocations because they are so few in number, and we have such a large world to preach to. Marriage is abundant, while what has saved the Church from the brink of destruction (Read about Saint Dominic and Saint Francis to understand this statement) has been tossed to the side and spat upon. Please, don't change the emphasis of this forum. It has helped me immensely with my discernment, and it has brought many diverse people to be friends of mine. Keep up the good work. Edited December 29, 2011 by FuturePriest387 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarbTherese Posted December 29, 2011 Share Posted December 29, 2011 [quote name='dUSt' timestamp='1325138753' post='2359183'] I don't understand what I could have done differently without making anybody mad. I want this to be a board that focuses on priesthood and religious life, because I think the church has placed great importance on that. "The Vocation Station" has already been referred to by name in many articles, blogs, radio interviews, etc, so I don't think it would be a good idea to change it. I'm honestly at a loss. I hope you all can forgive my lack of better leadership in this situation. [/quote] I think you leadership is absolutely spot on, dUSt! ...... I think that your initial statement "don't start focusing on marriage in here" was initially misunderstood in that we are not to initiate threads on any other subject but religious life and the priesthood in "Vocation Station" and fair enough - our instructions from leadership. This misunderstanding developed into what is a "vocation" and was probably off topic. Apologies there for "off topic". Because I have a personal problem with the term "Vocation Station" is purely and simply 'my problem' and nothing that causes me any sort of grief. "All authority comes from God" St Paul tells us and hence if you want it "Vocation Station" limited to threads on religious life and priesthood, so be it! You are our leadership and authority on Phatmass and personally I think you do a great job. We haven't been asked to date to plant cabbages upside down (we have a saint who was asked to do so by her novice mistress. And so she did) The fact that Phatmass Phorum and Vocation Station has such an excellent referral on the internet and elsewhere is the best of reasons to keep things as they have been - and that was threads on religious life and the priesthood in Vocation Station. I think sub forums in the "Vocation Station" would be a good idea, but then I am only one of the troops - one of the 'faces in the pew' as it were with no other problems nor duties but to read and post away and at times to the headache, I am sure, of leadership and others. We love youse all too, dUst! God richly bless you and thank you for Phatmass Phorum and Vocation Station .............. I hope you had a great Christmas............Barb Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnneLine Posted December 29, 2011 Share Posted December 29, 2011 (edited) Hi, dUSt and all.... Wow, it can be astonishing what happens around here when one goes off to a gov't office for a few hours! One of my spiritual directors once said that I have a tendency to react like an outraged lover when some of my hot-button topics are touched.... and apparently I am not the only one. Well....at least we are all doing it for the One we love... and for vocations to serve God's people. So... first off...dUSt, thank you for giving us Phatmass. thank you for listening to the Spirit in setting it up, and in the way you go about administering it. And yes, thank you for listening to us and sharing your logic with us.... and for letting us get some of this pent up energy out of our systems. And thanks for giving us tough love when we need it. Someone has to do the tough stuff, and you and the moderators do that for us. Thank you. Prayers & Props. Second, to use a religious life term, dUSt is our 'superior' ... not because he is wonderful or brilliant (although he is ) but in that he owns this board.... that means he gets to make the rules. He is the final arbitrator of 'dust-ups' around here (sorry, dUSt, I couldn't resist ). dUSt has explained his rationale, and while it might not be the choices I would have made, he is the one in the role that makes those decisions. I honor that he has a tough job, and it is our responsiblity to try to make that easier for him to do. Third, I think many good points have been made by a lot of people on both sides of this issue.... but perhaps it has gotten a little more polarized than needed to be. I agree with Strictly Inkblot.... right now we are probably too in-the-middle of it for us to be able to see the forest for the trees. I have no doubt that the Holy Spirit is active here.... and the answers are somewhere in the middle of all of this. We need to be quiet enough and prayerful enough to really LISTEN.... to everyone. Even before I re-logged on, I heard the same thing some of the others have said.... let's let this quiet down for a few days and then see if there are some fruits that are ready to be harvested... maybe it will be enough to just follow dUSt's new guideline, perhaps there is need for a sub-board or second board, or.... ???? Who knows what the Spirit may have in store! Bottom line as I see it.... this is a valuable place, and what we are doing is important. We can work together to get what we want and need and better serve God and the Church... as priests, religious, laity, and do that working together. I love you all.... While we may not agree on ephrything, we are doing a pretty good job of phorming a phamily that can phight pharly and have phun without needing a physician or a repheree. At the end of the day, this is not a bad thing.... not bad at all. Holding all in prayer.... Anne Line Edited December 29, 2011 by AnneLine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarbTherese Posted December 29, 2011 Share Posted December 29, 2011 Wonderful post - and stated with wisdom, appreciation ........... and humour! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FutureSister2009 Posted December 29, 2011 Share Posted December 29, 2011 I have been putting marriage back on my table lately but that doesn't mean Religious Life is completely gone from my mind yet. I don't know for sure what God wants me which is why I'm intrigued by the marriage threads. And I am also intrigued by Vocation Station. I really can't tell what God is calling me to yet. If I am called to married life, I am going to continue to pray for Vocations because I know how much they are needed. And if I have children and one of them says they want to be a priest or a Sister, they have my support all the way Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FutureCarmeliteClaire Posted December 29, 2011 Share Posted December 29, 2011 dUST had a simple request and he was not banning ANYONE from posting , he just wants to keep the main focus of VS on what it was intended to be. I think we can all respect that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Totus Tuus Posted December 29, 2011 Share Posted December 29, 2011 [quote name='faithcecelia' timestamp='1325114683' post='2358754'] No, but there are discerners of those ages, and that is what concerns me. I do not think it appriopriate that we have one rule for those seeking one vocation and another for those seeking another. I havent yet had the right opportunity, but if it comes up I would certainly be interested to know if a girl of 12/13 who is *certain* they are called to religious life would feel ready to get married if they felt their calling was marriage. I suspect none would. [/quote] This only seems to support my belief that RSH should be left to the older members. I AM in support of those discerning marriage to have their own place to post. My problem is that I DON'T think that is RSH, and I strongly disagree with the statement that anyone who is old enough to discern religious life seriously is old enough to talk about sex. I discerned religious life from the age of 7, and some girls are attracted to marriage from the age of 7. That does not mean that we need to be talking about sex at that young age. The difference between VS and RSH is that you can talk about your religious discernment without needing to talk about sex. The focus of RSH on the other hand is NOT talking about a vocation to marriage, per se, it is talking about NFP (which is sex-related) and other marriage and children matters.[quote name='EmilyAnn' timestamp='1325118594' post='2358812'] I wonder if maybe the answer is to split VS in two, one for marriage/dating discernments and one for religious life/priest discernments. Kind of like 'The "Special" Boards are split. It keeps separate places for each of them but without really creating a whole new board for marriage. [/quote] This. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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