Prom Question

[PhuturePriest]

Would it be considered weird or rude to ask a girl out to her school prom? I wouldn't really be able to ask her to mine because, well, I don't have one.

Edited December 12, 2012 by FuturePriest387

[LinaSt.Cecilia2772]

Ehhhh.........yeah I think it would be a little weird. If you were actually dating the girl then maybe it wouldn't be as weird, but if you're not then it would be awkward.

 

Since it's her prom she does get a say in who she would like to go with. I have friends who go to different schools than me, and one of my guy friends asked me to go to his prom, and I asked him to go to mine since there were two ya know??

[Nihil Obstat]

I think we already know the answer to this one. :|

[PhuturePriest]

I think we already know the answer to this one. :|

 

Quiet. I'm getting outside opinions. :P

[Vincent Vega]

Not necessarily, but maybe. Hard to tell in such a vague scenario.

[Nihil Obstat]

That is like going to St. Thomas Aquinas and saying "Hey bro, is eternal happiness the proper object of hope?" 
And Aquinas says "Hey my man, it is like this: The Apostle says (Hebrews 6:19) that we have hope "which entereth in," i.e. maketh us to enter . . . "within the veil," i.e. into the happiness of heaven, according to the interpretation of a gloss on these words. Therefore the object of hope is eternal happiness.

I answer that, As stated above (Article 1), the hope of which we speak now, attains God by leaning on His help in order to obtain the hoped for good. Now an effect must be proportionate to its cause. Wherefore the good which we ought to hope for from God properly and chiefly is the infinite good, which is proportionate to the power of our divine helper, since it belongs to an infinite power to lead anyone to an infinite good. Such a good is eternal life, which consists in the enjoyment of God Himself. For we should hope from Him for nothing less than Himself, since His goodness, whereby He imparts good things to His creature, is no less than His Essence. Therefore the proper and principal object of hope is eternal happiness."

 

And then you go "Well I think I will just go over here and ask my bro Luther. Peace, doc."

[PhuturePriest]

Not necessarily, but maybe. Hard to tell in such a vague scenario.

 

One thing NIhil mentioned is that it may be considered rude to ask, because it's essentially inviting yourself to a party. But he devised a plan to get the subject going. Basically, I'll mention the prom and ask her if she has a date, and I'll say something subtle like "If I went to your school I would totally ask you!" (Though the wording may be edited to fit the conversation), wherein she will hopefully ask me to go. That way it's kind of her idea but I'm the one that brought it up in a subtle-ish way.

[Nihil Obstat]

Of course, phrased that way it is still pretty blatantly obvious what you are doing. :P

That is subtlety to a guy. To a girl that is practically hitting her over the head with your caveman club, then pounding your chest and going "ME, YOU, GO PARTY!"

[theculturewarrior]

Better an open rebuke than a love that remains hidden.  Take it from a man who wasted a lot of time thinking too much about these things.  If you like a girl ask her out.  If she says no, just scoff and say "whatever."  And don't think about her again until she comes looking for you.

[theculturewarrior]

Of course, phrased that way it is still pretty blatantly obvious what you are doing. :P

That is subtlety to a guy. To a girl that is practically hitting her over the head with your caveman club, then pounding your chest and going "ME, YOU, GO PARTY!"

 

Some women value sincerity in a man.  In my experience, women will forgive a lot of things, but emotional insecurity not so much.  Know your worth, be confident, and let the chips fall where they may.  That's what I would do if I knew then what I know now.  You don't have to apologize for your masculinity.  Communication is a two way street and she has to figure out how to talk to you just as much you have to figure how to talk to her.

Edited December 12, 2012 by theculturewarrior

[BigJon16]

That is like going to St. Thomas Aquinas and saying "Hey bro, is eternal happiness the proper object of hope?" 
And Aquinas says "Hey my man, it is like this: The Apostle says (Hebrews 6:19) that we have hope "which entereth in," i.e. maketh us to enter . . . "within the veil," i.e. into the happiness of heaven, according to the interpretation of a gloss on these words. Therefore the object of hope is eternal happiness.

I answer that, As stated above (Article 1), the hope of which we speak now, attains God by leaning on His help in order to obtain the hoped for good. Now an effect must be proportionate to its cause. Wherefore the good which we ought to hope for from God properly and chiefly is the infinite good, which is proportionate to the power of our divine helper, since it belongs to an infinite power to lead anyone to an infinite good. Such a good is eternal life, which consists in the enjoyment of God Himself. For we should hope from Him for nothing less than Himself, since His goodness, whereby He imparts good things to His creature, is no less than His Essence. Therefore the proper and principal object of hope is eternal happiness."

 

And then you go "Well I think I will just go over here and ask my bro Luther. Peace, doc."

 

 

I think sombody needs a break from writing papers...

[Basilisa Marie]

Better an open rebuke than a love that remains hidden.  Take it from a man who wasted a lot of time thinking too much about these things.  If you like a girl ask her out.  If she says no, just scoff and say "whatever."  And don't think about her again until she comes looking for you.

 

 

Some women value sincerity in a man.  In my experience, women will forgive a lot of things, but emotional insecurity not so much.  Know your worth, be confident, and let the chips fall where they may.  That's what I would do if I knew then what I know now.  You don't have to apologize for your masculinity.  Communication is a two way street and she has to figure out how to talk to you just as much you have to figure how to talk to her.

 

 

Right, but we're not talking about love here.  We're talking about infatuation, possibly affection, and a school dance.  

 

Ask her if she's got her dress picked out for prom.  Or what her plans are, in a friendly-interest sort of way.   Just asking her if she has a date is PLENTY to communicate your interest, and put the idea in her head of you as a possibility.   Don't ask her to her own prom, and don't say "Well I'd sure like to go with you!" because that'll put pressure on her to ask you, make things SUPER awkward if she doesn't want to.  Asking what her plans are and listening in a super-interested way is enough to let her know that you're interested. 

[PhuturePriest]

Right, but we're not talking about love here.  We're talking about infatuation, possibly affection, and a school dance.  

 

Ask her if she's got her dress picked out for prom.  Or what her plans are, in a friendly-interest sort of way.   Just asking her if she has a date is PLENTY to communicate your interest, and put the idea in her head of you as a possibility.   Don't ask her to her own prom, and don't say "Well I'd sure like to go with you!" because that'll put pressure on her to ask you, make things SUPER awkward if she doesn't want to.  Asking what her plans are and listening in a super-interested way is enough to let her know that you're interested. 

 

Well, there's obviously a difference in opinion as to what I should do. Your plan seems like it would work, but I can't really trust myself to be that effective in this. I'll either say something stupid to make her think I'm not interested or I'll say something obvious that tells her I am interested.

[Basilisa Marie]

Well, there's obviously a difference in opinion as to what I should do. Your plan seems like it would work, but I can't really trust myself to be that effective in this. I'll either say something stupid to make her think I'm not interested or I'll say something obvious that tells her I am interested.

 

I dunno, asking her if she has a date, she says no, then asking if there's anyone she was thinking about asking and leaving it at that is pretty clear.   I know there's a lot of people around here who give a lot of cred to the idea of a man pursuing a woman, but the thing is that it's her prom. If she wants to ask you, she'll ask you. :)  

 

Who knows, maybe she just wants to go with a bunch of girlfriends.  Some girls prefer that.  But if that ends up being the case, that's doesn't mean that she's completely uninterested in you, either. :)

 

When is this shindig, anyway? 

[PhuturePriest]

I dunno, asking her if she has a date, she says no, then asking if there's anyone she was thinking about asking and leaving it at that is pretty clear.   I know there's a lot of people around here who give a lot of cred to the idea of a man pursuing a woman, but the thing is that it's her prom. If she wants to ask you, she'll ask you. :)

 

Who knows, maybe she just wants to go with a bunch of girlfriends.  Some girls prefer that.  But if that ends up being the case, that's doesn't mean that she's completely uninterested in you, either. :)

 

When is this shindig, anyway? 

 

Okay. We haven't known each other long so I'm not sure if asking me would immediately come to her mind, but perhaps putting ideas in her head will help with that.

 

I have no clue. I assume around April and May. I know it's way early which is why I am not going to talk about it, but I want to do it at a time where she actually won't have a date yet, so I was thinking maybe January.