theculturewarrior Posted October 18, 2004 Posted October 18, 2004 [quote name='FutureNunJMJ' date='Oct 18 2004, 02:39 PM'] My mom doesn't want me to become a nun I listen to her, but I don't follow everything she tells me... [/quote] Let me tell you all something...you can move to Malaysia, convert to Islam, bomb the American Embassy and become incarcerated at Guantanamo Bay...or you can move to Mexico, marry a good Catholic person, and have eight babies and not a peso to feed the with... But wherever you go, you can't get away from your mom. She will always be your mom and it's a beautiful thing really. If your mom doesn't want you to go to Steubie, or to be a nun, I would definitely pray about it, and reflect on it, if nothing else, to honor your parents. Maybe you have a higher calling. Or maybe your mom sees something you don't. [i]Sometimes[/i] we have to be the role models to our parents! But she's still Mom! She was given that most honorable rank by God himself.
Thy Geekdom Come Posted October 18, 2004 Author Posted October 18, 2004 [quote name='IcePrincessKRS' date='Oct 18 2004, 03:39 PM'] Moms.... we're such a pain in the neck.... [/quote] Awww...I'm sure you're a great mom. My mother reminds me of a mix between Marie and Debra from "Everybody Loves Raymond" She's also verbally abusing and consistently brings down her children's moods, even calling us "stupid" and "morons" on occasion.
theculturewarrior Posted October 18, 2004 Posted October 18, 2004 [quote name='Raphael' date='Oct 18 2004, 02:47 PM'] She's also verbally abusing and consistently brings down her children's moods, even calling us "stupid" and "morons" on occasion. [/quote] That's sad. You certainly are no moron Raph!
Thy Geekdom Come Posted October 18, 2004 Author Posted October 18, 2004 [quote name='theculturewarrior' date='Oct 18 2004, 03:45 PM'] Let me tell you all something...you can move to Malaysia, convert to Islam, bomb the American Embassy and become incarcerated at Guantanamo Bay...or you can move to Mexico, marry a good Catholic person, and have eight babies and not a peso to feed the with... But wherever you go, you can't get away from your mom. She will always be your mom and it's a beautiful thing really. If your mom doesn't want you to go to Steubie, or to be a nun, I would definitely pray about it, and reflect on it, if nothing else, to honor your parents. Maybe you have a higher calling. Or maybe your mom sees something you don't. [i]Sometimes[/i] we have to be the role models to our parents! But she's still Mom! She was given that most honorable rank by God himself. [/quote] She's my mother, and I'll love her for it regardless of how she treats me, but I have to realize and take into account that she is only human. As far as my discernment goes, she knows [b]nothing[/b] about my interior life and is only worried about mundane concerns. As far as my discernment goes, she has no valid weight greater than my friends. Her role is as a mother, not as my vocation director. She neither has expertise, nor right, nor duty to dictate what I am called to. She may, on some level, be concerned about my well being, but she thinks my well-being is in doing what she wants, and it's not. It's in doing what God wants. It's important to note that she didn't ask me what God wanted me to do or what I wanted to do. She didn't ask what would make me happy. She didn't ask about what I felt called to. She didn't even really ask in any spirit or interest or growth. She asked as a means to debate and to discourage me.
theculturewarrior Posted October 18, 2004 Posted October 18, 2004 [quote name='Raphael' date='Oct 18 2004, 02:55 PM'] Her role is as a mother, not as my vocation director. She neither has expertise, nor right, nor duty to dictate what I am called to. [/quote] I think I bit off more than I can chew here. I'll be going now. :leave: Like I said, I can't relate. My mom [i]is[/i] my spiritual director.
Thy Geekdom Come Posted October 18, 2004 Author Posted October 18, 2004 [quote name='theculturewarrior' date='Oct 18 2004, 03:51 PM'] That's sad. You certainly are no moron Raph! [/quote] I know I'm not a moron. I'm a legume.
Sanvean Posted October 18, 2004 Posted October 18, 2004 [quote name='theculturewarrior' date='Oct 18 2004, 03:45 PM'] If your mom doesn't want you to go to Steubie, or to be a nun, I would definitely pray about it, and reflect on it, if nothing else, to honor your parents. Maybe you have a higher calling. Or maybe your mom sees something you don't. [i]Sometimes[/i] we have to be the role models to our parents! But she's still Mom! She was given that most honorable rank by God himself. [/quote] Well, yes, part of honouring one's parents involves, at the least, considering their advice. I think it's safe to say that the people in these situations seem to have not turned a completely blind eye to the advice of their mothers... but honouring parents, after emancipation, is not the same as obedience. This is a topic I've spent a lot of time looking into, after some... difficulties with my parents(at one point, for example, over the summer, I was forbidden from joining my father on a vacation if I wouldn't agree to miss Mass) ... often, parents can, indeed have powerful insights. Sadly, however, it is also the case that we will often have to chose between following our Lord, and following the desires of our parents.
Thy Geekdom Come Posted October 18, 2004 Author Posted October 18, 2004 [quote name='theculturewarrior' date='Oct 18 2004, 03:59 PM'] I think I bit off more than I can chew here. I'll be going now. :leave: Like I said, I can't relate. My mom [i]is[/i] my spiritual director. [/quote] I'm not upset with you, bro. No worries. You and I just disagree on a role of a mother.
theculturewarrior Posted October 18, 2004 Posted October 18, 2004 [quote name='Raphael' date='Oct 18 2004, 03:00 PM'] I'm not upset with you, bro. No worries. You and I just disagree on a role of a mother. [/quote] I think our mothers may be a little different. Trust me though...every family has it's troubles. My dad doesn't go to church. He makes fun of me for going. Pray for him...
Thy Geekdom Come Posted October 18, 2004 Author Posted October 18, 2004 [quote name='theculturewarrior' date='Oct 18 2004, 04:03 PM'] My dad doesn't go to church. He makes fun of me for going. Pray for him... [/quote] Of course he will have my prayers!
Thy Geekdom Come Posted October 18, 2004 Author Posted October 18, 2004 [quote name='theculturewarrior' date='Oct 18 2004, 04:03 PM'] I think our mothers may be a little different. Trust me though...every family has it's troubles. My dad doesn't go to church. He makes fun of me for going. Pray for him... [/quote] Yeah...I just got one of those nagging mothers...it's okay, but I have to be very careful talking to her... I wouldn't trust her as my spiritual director, vocation director, etc. More importantly, my father is on my side, and I do very much respect his opinions, character, and discerning nature. My father has always had my trust and I truly believe his interests are my interests, i.e. he wants me to have a good and happy life. He worries about the finances, too, but I think he wouldn't mind losing some money for my sake. He already wants to sell all my mother's antiques, and she has enough to pay for all my college, believe me.
Piccoli Fiori JMJ Posted October 18, 2004 Posted October 18, 2004 My mom is Catholic but a strange disallusioned one... I don't think she believes in the real presesnce... My dad isn't Catholic either, but he goes to Mass with us every Sunday and he has beginnning to pray, which is new to us all... I kinda feel like Micah... My mom has no insight to my interior life, she would yell at me for being a fanatic and that I'm taking these things too far... SHe makes me feel bad about being a devout Catholic... That is part of my problem... I love my mom very much, but she doesn't get a lot of things I do and why I do them...
Piccoli Fiori JMJ Posted October 18, 2004 Posted October 18, 2004 [quote name='Raphael' date='Oct 18 2004, 03:16 PM'] He already wants to sell all my mother's antiques, and she has enough to pay for all my college, believe me. [/quote] We have way too many antiques... my dad has records EVERYWHERE! we have so many antiques that we bought that we could sell to pay for some of these things, but, nope, my family is too materialistic... It would be nice if they sold some... not all, just some... it would also aleviate the clutter of our small house that we should be very grateful to have Maybe I'll sell some of my stuff... That should help some... I'm thinking of selling my car... If I go to Steubie, I'm not going to need it...
Theoketos Posted October 18, 2004 Posted October 18, 2004 TWC is right, the voice of your parents is the voice of God, to add a twist from Padre Pio, but then again, if you are sure it is God's will, then your parents will fall in line.
Thy Geekdom Come Posted October 18, 2004 Author Posted October 18, 2004 [quote name='FutureNunJMJ' date='Oct 18 2004, 04:22 PM'] We have way too many antiques... my dad has records EVERYWHERE! we have so many antiques that we bought that we could sell to pay for some of these things, but, nope, my family is too materialistic... It would be nice if they sold some... not all, just some... it would also aleviate the clutter of our small house that we should be very grateful to have Maybe I'll sell some of my stuff... That should help some... I'm thinking of selling my car... If I go to Steubie, I'm not going to need it... [/quote] Yeah...materialism is terrible. I mean...my parents live in a 3500 square foot house filled with antiques next to a playground with a beautiful view of a creek and a walking path behind it, along with fields which are protected by law and can't be developed... My parents, mom in particular, still talk about how much they want to move into a larger, more expensive lakeside home... I've asked them, "why can you move from a $250,000 house to a $300,000+ house with no problem, but you are so hesitant to put that much money and confidence towards your children's college funds?"
Thy Geekdom Come Posted October 18, 2004 Author Posted October 18, 2004 [quote name='Theoketos' date='Oct 18 2004, 04:31 PM'] TWC is right, the voice of your parents is the voice of God, to add a twist from Padre Pio, but then again, if you are sure it is God's will, then your parents will fall in line. [/quote] And when my parents even disagree amongst themselves? Listen, I'm not taking their words with a grain of salt. Finances are a caution and I must be careful, but to say that my parents speak with the voice of God is a bit too far...I mean...my mother wanted me to become a priest so she could use me to advocate a female priesthood... There is certainly something to the authority of parents, but I'm afraid it was never meant to be taken as having weight in all aspects of life. I must follow the will of God first. I can't help it if they disagree, I can only pray that they come to realize with time that I am right.
Thy Geekdom Come Posted October 18, 2004 Author Posted October 18, 2004 Oh, and what's more, the good thing about my parents is that, even if they adamantly disagree with me, they respect my decisions ultimately as my own, even though they may vocally continue to oppose them...
Piccoli Fiori JMJ Posted October 18, 2004 Posted October 18, 2004 I do hope that things work out for you Micah... I'm sure they will and your parents will come to understand... Just give them time and refuse to change your mind
theculturewarrior Posted October 18, 2004 Posted October 18, 2004 [quote name='Raphael' date='Oct 18 2004, 03:31 PM'] I've asked them, "why can you move from a $250,000 house to a $300,000+ house with no problem, but you are so hesitant to put that much money and confidence towards your children's college funds?" [/quote] Haha...if only I knew Richard Dawkins' email address, I would cut and paste this and send it to him! (BTW, Dawkins was the author of "the Selfish Gene," a book about how all altruism is actually genetic selfishness. He should have called it, "The Fallen Man.")
StColette Posted October 18, 2004 Posted October 18, 2004 Let's keep in mind that not all parents are in support for their children following the will of God. I know many of the phatmassers here struggle with their parents not wanting them to become priests, brothers, sisters, or nuns. Now just because their parents are saying that they don't support it doesn't mean that it isn't God's will. Generally the only person who can truly feel if they are follow God's will is the person themselves. No other person thinks, feels, or responds to things exactly the same. And then there are some parents who are all for vocations and following God's will and are very supportive of their children because they know it's not their decision to make nor is it their will for their children to follow but it is the will of God. So to say that all parents are the voice of God is really stretching it a bit too far.
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