Please be considerate when posting....

[socalscout]

[quote name='homeschoolmom' date='Apr 14 2005, 11:52 AM'] You can still get a Slurpee at 7-11?
[/quote]
I think they are called "Icees" now.

BTW What is a Trigger?

[God Conquers]

It's a lever which allows one to activate the firing mechanism of a gun.

[kateri05]

get out, they changed the names?!? its not 711 without Slurpees and i don't even like them!! ICees, pishposh, why even go, they don't have gas!!

wow. you think you know people.


right sorry, back to serious thread (HSmom you're a bad influence!! )

[Carnanc]

[quote name='socalscout' date='Apr 14 2005, 01:08 PM'] BTW What is a Trigger? [/quote]
How can the name of a topic be harmful if it is a reasonable topic?

[kateri05]

sometimes the topic itself is explicitly labeled like : someone committs suicide, cutting in america, etc etc (i made those up, they aren't real, but just examples)
apparently, for some, these are seen as triggers, ie. something that could set off a anxiety or panic attack or something that brings up bad memories or feelings associated with things in their past or present.
correct me if i'm wrong, anyone, or clarify!

[IcePrincessKRS]

[quote name='kateri05' date='Apr 14 2005, 02:14 PM'] get out, they changed the names?!? its not 711 without Slurpees and i don't even like them!! ICees, pishposh, why even go, they don't have gas!!

wow. you think you know people.


right sorry, back to serious thread (HSmom you're a bad influence!! ) [/quote]
Last time I went to 7=11 it was still a Slurpee... I think Ices are someplace else... and according to their website its still Slurpee.



[img]http://www.7-eleven.com/images/assets/711_slurpee_d.jpg[/img]

[Tony]

that looks so good.. now I want one!

Edited April 14, 2005 by Tony

[IcePrincessKRS]

And on the serious note, I know we can't censor everything we post, but I agree with Mickey's Girl, putting better titles on threads would go a long way in helping those who may be triggered by more "sensitive" subject matter, that way they don't go into what looks like an innocent post only to find its about something awful. I've opened threads before thinking they were just some hum-drum thing only to find it was about something really tragic that made me feel sick to my stomach. And no, I am not one of the people who have "triggers" but still some subjects I'd just rather not read, or at the very least be more prepared to read it when I open the thread.

[catholicflower]

I agree. Better topic labels are a good idea.

[Thy Geekdom Come]

Okay, I think there needs to be some clarification here.

A trigger is a word, image, action, sound, or any other mental stimulator which calls to mind flashbacks or event recall and causes anxiety or panic. It is usually a reference to something traumatic and can cause troubles with those who suffer from post-traumatic stress or similar conditions.

Usually, it is something completely unintentional. There is likely no chance that anything I type will ever purposely contain triggers. I would never do such a thing, and if I did, I would be as careful as I could to remove all potential triggers or to give some warning ahead of time.

I do not think that it is an unreasonable request that anyone posting on topics, especially those relating to sexual issues, take great care in posting so that no one experiences a trigger. It is not something that people consent to. Stop blaming others for having triggers, realize their difficulties, and try to avoid them, for their sake. Panic attacks are very real and very painful.

You probably will not always avoid the triggers successfully. There will be times when you say something which triggers anxiety or panic without meaning to. Sometimes, triggers appear to everyone else to be neutral. Most people who experience triggers will be understanding of this and patient and will not hold it against you. We hope that they will, but we must take efforts not to bring others to harm.

Likewise, they need to take efforts to avoid any topics, marked or unmarked, once they realize that they may contain triggers.

This is not a matter where someone is often at fault, but only where innocent mistakes cause big problems.

Please be patient and understanding with each other. Act like siblings in Christ. Try to keep your mind open to avoiding any harm of your siblings. That is only a Christian thing to do.

God bless,

Micah

[God Conquers]

[quote]triggers appear to everyone else to be neutral[/quote]

[quote]Usually, it is something completely unintentional. There is likely no chance that anything I type will ever purposely contain triggers[/quote]

If this is the case how can we apply any of the rest of the stuff you talked about?

[crusader1234]

[quote name='Raphael' date='Apr 14 2005, 07:20 PM'] Okay, I think there needs to be some clarification here.

A trigger is a word, image, action, sound, or any other mental stimulator which calls to mind flashbacks or event recall and causes anxiety or panic. It is usually a reference to something traumatic and can cause troubles with those who suffer from post-traumatic stress or similar conditions.

Usually, it is something completely unintentional. There is likely no chance that anything I type will ever purposely contain triggers. I would never do such a thing, and if I did, I would be as careful as I could to remove all potential triggers or to give some warning ahead of time.

I do not think that it is an unreasonable request that anyone posting on topics, especially those relating to sexual issues, take great care in posting so that no one experiences a trigger. It is not something that people consent to. Stop blaming others for having triggers, realize their difficulties, and try to avoid them, for their sake. Panic attacks are very real and very painful.

You probably will not always avoid the triggers successfully. There will be times when you say something which triggers anxiety or panic without meaning to. Sometimes, triggers appear to everyone else to be neutral. Most people who experience triggers will be understanding of this and patient and will not hold it against you. We hope that they will, but we must take efforts not to bring others to harm.

Likewise, they need to take efforts to avoid any topics, marked or unmarked, once they realize that they may contain triggers.

This is not a matter where someone is often at fault, but only where innocent mistakes cause big problems.

Please be patient and understanding with each other. Act like siblings in Christ. Try to keep your mind open to avoiding any harm of your siblings. That is only a Christian thing to do.

God bless,

Micah [/quote]
Sorry, but what you're saying makes absolutely no sense to me. You say that people usually bring up 'triggers' unintentionally, and have no way of knowing what may or not be a trigger for a given individual. And yet, we are supposed to censor ourselves for others that may or may not possibly be offended and avoid triggers or be called insensitive? That seems a tad ridiculous. You mentioned that when discussing topics such as sex (or other hot topics such as violence and abuse I'm guessing) that we should be extra careful to avoid potential triggers. Now, call me crazy, but I think people should be able to carry on mature conversations without censorship. If a topic is about sex/suicide or something that is likely to contain a trigger for an individual, that individual should know not to enter that discussion.

I'm all for the support of our Phamily. If somebody has a personal issue they want to discuss with me in PM or what have you, discuss away. However, expecting Phorum users to censor themselves (when the issue could easily be circumvented by the user with personal issues involving the topic simply not reading on) in a completely mature conversation just for the sake of maybe not triggering someone is ridiculous. Thats not support. Thats walking on eggshells. I don't think its helpful (or realistic) to go around tiptoeing around issues becuase somebody that should know not to be reading the topic might get 'triggered'.

[phatcatholic]

i don't think hughey is asking us to censor ourselves, or walk on egg shells or tip-toe the issues. as far as i can tell, she is simply asking that we post with a little couth. for example, in the NFP board there are often discussions that are sexually explicit. however, they are allowed to exist b/c the people engaged in them are mature about it. they use the proper vocabulary words instead of slang terminology and they say just enough to get the point across instead of getting into every graphic detail.

also, everyone knows full well (and i'm sure hughy does too) that there will be some topics that we simply won't know are triggers for people. there's nothing anyone can really do about that, and i don't think anyone is asking us to place disclaimers on every single thing we say. however, there are certain issues and events that we can safely generalize as traumatic to the majority of people. you know what they are. i don't have to list them. if we title a thread appropriately before we post about it, then we wont have to worry about effecting anyone. then, we can post until our heart's content. its really only when we bring up a traumatic event in a thread with an unrelated title that we would have to worry about posting a disclaimer. even then we don't have to censor ourselves or avoid the topic just b/c it is traumatic. just type "possible trigger" and then go on w/ whatever you are going to say. our rights aren't being infringed upon.

finally, note that this is just a simple request. no one is imposing anything or demanding a rule change, so the fact that this can't be enforced really isn't an issue. its just someone asking for a favor, and personally, i consider it to be a legitimate one. rather or not the rest of you go along with it is really up to you.

[franciscanheart]

thanks phatty.

[RemnantRules]

[Thy Geekdom Come]

[quote name='phatcatholic' date='Apr 15 2005, 04:12 AM'] i don't think hughey is asking us to censor ourselves, or walk on egg shells or tip-toe the issues. as far as i can tell, she is simply asking that we post with a little couth. for example, in the NFP board there are often discussions that are sexually explicit. however, they are allowed to exist b/c the people engaged in them are mature about it. they use the proper vocabulary words instead of slang terminology and they say just enough to get the point across instead of getting into every graphic detail.

also, everyone knows full well (and i'm sure hughy does too) that there will be some topics that we simply won't know are triggers for people. there's nothing anyone can really do about that, and i don't think anyone is asking us to place disclaimers on every single thing we say. however, there are certain issues and events that we can safely generalize as traumatic to the majority of people. you know what they are. i don't have to list them. if we title a thread appropriately before we post about it, then we wont have to worry about effecting anyone. then, we can post until our heart's content. its really only when we bring up a traumatic event in a thread with an unrelated title that we would have to worry about posting a disclaimer. even then we don't have to censor ourselves or avoid the topic just b/c it is traumatic. just type "possible trigger" and then go on w/ whatever you are going to say. our rights aren't being infringed upon.

finally, note that this is just a simple request. no one is imposing anything or demanding a rule change, so the fact that this can't be enforced really isn't an issue. its just someone asking for a favor, and personally, i consider it to be a legitimate one. rather or not the rest of you go along with it is really up to you. [/quote]
Bingo.

Post with tact. There are general things which would give people triggers, you can at least avoid or forewarn about the general things, if you don't know the specifics. I would post examples, but...well...that would be writing things I know would trigger people.

[Ash Wednesday]

While we are on the subject of being considerate -- and I sincerely hope it is just a misunderstanding -- may I respectfully say that I do NOT think people should only be considerate on abuse boards. I would kindly appreciate not being placed under that assumption.

Edited April 15, 2005 by Ash Wednesday

[toledo_jesus]

Are we saying that we should post with tact and be polite on the boards? Cause I thought that went without saying.

Curse this internet, and the anonymity therein. It helps people be insensitive.
Regardless...I don't even know what you all are talking about, as usual.

[rachael]

why do people have to be so mean to laura? she's a good girl :thumb:

[Fidei Defensor]

[quote name='rachael' date='Apr 15 2005, 09:09 PM'] why do people have to be so mean to laura. she's a good girl :thumb: [/quote]
Amen to that!