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Ten Things For An Aspirant Not To Say


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OnlySunshine
Posted

Yes. It's right after Holy Hour.

 

Good point!

OnlySunshine
Posted

Why do use the organ?  It's so outdated!  You need a drum set instead!

OnlySunshine
Posted

I know you say "lights out" at 10pm but I don't go to bed until 1am so can I keep my light on?

 

I'm not waking up at 3am to go to nighttime Adoration.

 

 

Posted (edited)

If we all learnt sign langauge we could converse freely during the great silence. Hadn't you thought of that already?

I'm going to break out into liturgical dance during the mass. Would you mind not clapping my efforts afterwards?

I've an idea about replacing some bible readings with a bit of Rainer Maria Rilke. Shall we meet later to talk about it?

When do I get to interview the community? I need to make sure you're all good enough for me..

Edited by Benedictus
OnlySunshine
Posted

Water?!?  That's all you have to drink?!?  I need to bring a flatbed truck full of Coke!!!

 

When's movie night?

 

 

TheresaThoma
Posted

Chrysostom that is awesome!

Posted

Darn? You want me to darn it?..............

 

 

DARN!

PhuturePriest
Posted

I know you guys shave off your hair as a penance, but can I keep mine? I don't see the need in throwing away such a ridiculously amazing gift from God.

Posted

"I 'want' to be a nun so I don't have to work."
I really heard that from someone when I was starting to discern, they were like I don't like to have to pay the electric bill.

I hate driving as well and solely for that reason, I'm entering a Monastery.

Ancilla Domini
Posted

I have a list of 1001 movies I want to watch before I die, but I'm only at 534. Could I continue to check off my list while I'm at the convent?

Posted

:unsure:

 

Your vows are so....archaic. Can't I just invent my own and take those?

I love your order, but I really hate your apostolate. You guys need a serious revamp.

Why is formation so long? I'm already sure I want to be a nun. Can't I just make my perpetual profession now??!?!?

I actually know someone who said that to her vocation directress and the VD looked at her funny.  

 

She didn't enter into that community.

Posted

Actually, this doesn't seem like an unreasonable request if done for the right reasons and in the right setting (privately with VD or Superior).  If you get a letter from your doctor, they might allow you to bring it.
 

My favorite pillow that I love to hug says sexy female dog on it, so probably not.

Posted

I use this special serum for my face, will you be able to make it available to me? I would hate to end up a wrinkly nun.

 

 

Your cook isn't very imaginative is she? We've had the same veggies three days in a row. Maybe you should send her on a refresher course.

 

 

You want me to dig - with an actual spade? Where's the rotovator?

 

 

Have you people never heard of a vacuum cleaner? What's with all this beating the rugs by hand?

Posted

I don't really believe all the tenets of the Catholic faith and lean more towards Eastern religions, so can I just sit in the back of the chapel and watch everyone else participate in the Mass? I promise to be quiet.

brandelynmarie
Posted

Outta props, but :hehe:

Posted

I'm giving up all my earthly possessions, but I insist that you take them.  They include 12 bottles of vintage wine, 4 bottles of rum, 3 bottles of bourbon, 5 bottles of gin, 2 bottles of vodka, an 18-pack set of Hofbräuhaus beer, a cocktail shaker set, 6 Pope Benedict shot glasses, and two beer steins I hand-painted myself.

Posted

 

I'm giving up all my earthly possessions, but I insist that you take them.  They include 12 bottles of vintage wine, 4 bottles of rum, 3 bottles of bourbon, 5 bottles of gin, 2 bottles of vodka, an 18-pack set of Hofbräuhaus beer, a cocktail shaker set, 6 Pope Benedict shot glasses, and two beer steins I hand-painted myself.

 

 

 

I sure hope you have good communion wine. Who's your buyer?

brandelynmarie
Posted

I really like slumber parties... Could we hang out in each other's cells on the weekends?

Richard Belcher
Posted

I don't like your veils very much.

 

Posted

Your priest's homilies are lacking a certain something - maybe I could give him a few pointers.

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