An Honest And Civil Discussion On The Modesty & Bikinis

[Era Might]

[quote name='tgoldson' timestamp='1310320978' post='2265349']I live here. Maybe if you saw the women that frequent our beach you would understand my point of view. Or maybe I misunderstand yours. When I hear that a women is dressing in skimpy attire to be seen, I assume that the woman in question has a slender or athletic figure. I would assume that an average American woman would not wear a skimpy bikini just to attract attention.
[/quote]
Well, it could depend on the beach. I'm in South Florida, beach capital of the country, so it might be a different atmosphere than some random beach in the north.

[Ed Normile]

[quote name='XIX' timestamp='1310247450' post='2265077']
Wearing a shirt is probably a good idea. Modesty, avoid sunburn (and skin cancer!!), and you don't have to worry about losing your scapular in the water.
[/quote]

Good one, its good to keep in mind not losing your Scapular.

I would have said twenty years ago that men without a shirt at a beach would be no different than men working in the garden or shoveling blacktop without a shirt to escape the heat. These days it seems that many women are as sexualized as men, I mean to say that women are becoming more the instigators in sexual situations. There is hardly a place where youth get together such as a club or bar that there is not women on the prowl for men or other women even, so I guess that in this environment it would be more modest for men to wear swim shirts. I would assume causing someone to sin would be as bad as sinning yourself, especially if done with intention.

Lol, I had two images of old mens swimwear I was going to post here, but it said I am "not allowed to use that image extension on this board" these were the swimsuits from the twenties, one was red and white stripes like wheres Waldo cartoon, and the other was an old Coney Island lifeguard.

Fashionable, modest and would cut down on the skin cancers too.

ed

[faithcecelia]

[quote name='MaterMisericordiae' timestamp='1310272971' post='2265198']
It's made very well. It's by Maxine of Hollywood. It's very comfortable to wear and slenderizing.
[/quote]


I must admit this made me smile. If we are talking about what is modest, what does and doesn't potentially lead to impure thoughts in ourselves or others, then a figure-improving swimdress could be percieved as less modest than a sporty bikini with a pot belly hanging over the bottoms - I certainly know which is more asthetically pleasing to me.

[4588686]

[quote name='Jesus_lol' timestamp='1310277062' post='2265241']
reading through this thread is like listening to people complain about the fuel economy of their yachts. In that this is all problems i really have never had and cant really understand.


I am definitely a "fullblooded" guy, but i cant say i really think about any of this stuff. reading this thread i get the impression that the ladies are seeing guys slobbering and masturbating staring at them(admittedly,not a pleasant image) and that the hypothetical guys who are concerned about chastity have to run a gauntlet of ravenous succubi just to get to the water.

Am i the only one who just goes to the beach and swims?

sometimes i will go "oh, she is pretty" or "lol that guy should probably go up a size or three in the shorts department" but generally i just go swimming.
[/quote]

Yep. Somehow I can avoid gawking at attractive women at the pool when I go swimming and I'm not even religious. I don't see how all these pious Catholic men can be struggling with lust to such an extent unless they're so sexually repressed that any ammount of a woman's flesh just sends them into a frenzy.

Here's an easy solution. If you're tempted by a woman then pull a Qur'an and 'lower your gaze'. If that doesn't work then jump in the cold pool water. I'm sure that will cool you down. If a woman wants to wear that wet suit like thing that Lillabettt links then that's great. But I'm sick of guys here and elsewhere emotionally blackmailing women by making them feel like they have to cover ever inch of flesh they have on the beach or else they're going to lead their brothers in Christ into mortal sin.

Just be a man and deal with your poo yourself. If you can't go to the beach without acting like a horny 14 year old boy and being set aflame by every bit of feminine flesh your gaze falls upon then just do everyone a favor and stay home.

Edited July 10, 2011 by Hasan

[4588686]

[quote name='Era Might' timestamp='1310307302' post='2265292']
Yes.

Bikinis have nothing to do with swimming. Women show off their bodies at the beach because they want to be seen. Men go to the beach because they want to see women (and the younger men usually want to show themselves off too).

The only people who wear bikinis for swimming purposes are men. Although technically I guess it's not a "bikini" but a swimming speedo. Those things should be phased out like 1980s basketball shorts.
[/quote]

And to tan. And to be cool. Most people at the pool don't swim for exercise. They just splash around. A bikini works fine for that.

[Era Might]

[quote name='Hasan' timestamp='1310323627' post='2265366']
And to tan. And to be cool.
[/quote]
The only "cool" people at the beach are the ones who got something to show. The 50 year old men hang out at the bar. They're still watching, but they don't venture out with the "cool" people to bare their flesh (although they wish they could).

Tanning is all about being seen (without looking like an albino).

Edited July 10, 2011 by Era Might

[Ash Wednesday]

Sarongs are my friends. Colorful, versatile, fashionable, long and plenty of coverage. Great with a modest swimsuit and you can wrap it in all fun different kinds of ways!

[img]http://www.theislandpalace.com/picturekris24.htm/batikredsunsarongdress.jpg[/img]

[faithcecelia]

[quote name='Ash Wednesday' timestamp='1310325162' post='2265391']
Sarongs are my friends. Colorful, versatile, fashionable, long and plenty of coverage. Great with a modest swimsuit and you can wrap it in all fun different kinds of ways!

[img]http://www.theislandpalace.com/picturekris24.htm/batikredsunsarongdress.jpg[/img]
[/quote]

I always have a sarong in my bag, they are great to cover up in so many ways - like last week I was in a vest and decided to go into Westminster and could just whip it out and be all covered. They are also amazingly useful in so many ways - emergency towel, sheet, bandage!!!

Edited July 10, 2011 by faithcecelia

[4588686]

[quote name='Era Might' timestamp='1310325063' post='2265387']
The only "cool" people at the beach are the ones who got something to show. The 50 year old men hang out at the bar. They're still watching, but they don't venture out with the "cool" people to bare their flesh (although they wish they could).[/QUOTE]

I mean cool as in temperature

[QUOTE]Tanning is all about being seen (without looking like an albino).
[/quote]


Yeah. People like being tan. That doesn't mean that they go to the pool to be gawked at while they tan. If the right person is looking I'm sure they're happy (someone they want to meet, find attractive, whatever) but that's true of every single social context, it's not unique to the pool.

[vee]

[Adrestia]

[quote name='CherieMadame' timestamp='1310322326' post='2265356']
The point for me is, though, even if they're NOT wearing it "to attract attention," I still think it is not considered modest attire and shouldn't be worn. I guess that's my point here - because people can dress in "modest" clothing but have an immodest attitude when wearing it, and that is just as wrong, too. I definitely don't think it's "just about the clothing," I think modesty covers a much wider sphere than that. That being said, however, I do think there are objective standards, no matter what your attitude or intention may be, and I don't think bikinis fall within that standard. Do you?
[/quote]

I think that it is more difficult to be modest in a string bikini than in a one piece swimsuit, but I will not say that women who wear string bikinis are immodest women. Attitude and intention are important when determining if a person is modest. Clothing choice reflects only a portion of a person's attitude and intention.

I used to think about modesty and attire in a very black and white manner (and I still find it odd that some very conservative Catholic friends of mine chose to wear strapless wedding gowns for their nuptials), but the older I get the less I think I know about other people's intentions.

[cmaD2006]

[quote name='JoyfulLife' timestamp='1310255175' post='2265110']
Oh yes, men need to dress modestly, too. I'm reminded of the commercial on TV where Ryan Gosling takes his shirt off to reveal pecs and a six-pack. There are women out there that go ga ga for that stuff. So, I agree with the poster about girly mags and men needing a shirt out of water.
[/quote]

Thank you!

I think men need to remember that there are women out there that would be (for lack of a better term) turned on by seeing pecs and a six-pack.

Now honestly, Ryan Gosling, a turn on. Nah. But -- a nice, tall, tan, built guy. Um. Yeah. No shirt ... even more.

So please put the shirt back on . And if you get women falling gaga all over you ... hmmm. There may be a reason.

[Azriel]

I must say, I guess I'm just a weirdo - but men look WAY more attractive in a well made suit than shirtless. Your mileage may vary, I guess.

[Maggyie]

[quote name='Azriel' timestamp='1310347461' post='2265519']
I must say, I guess I'm just a weirdo - but men look WAY more attractive in a well made suit than shirtless. Your mileage may vary, I guess.
[/quote]

ditto

The very first time I saw my fiance, he was wearing his investment banker uniform.

hubba hubba.

[Lil Red]

ain't nuthin' sexier on a guy than a plain white tee-shirt and blue jeans.


ahem.

[Jaime]

[quote name='Lil Red' timestamp='1310349772' post='2265536']
ain't nuthin' sexier on a guy than a plain white tee-shirt and blue jeans.


ahem.
[/quote]

says the woman who flaunts her bellybutton

[MissyP89]

[quote name='Lil Red' timestamp='1310349772' post='2265536']
ain't nuthin' sexier on a guy than a plain white tee-shirt and blue jeans.


ahem.
[/quote]

Preach it, girl!

[MissScripture]

[quote name='Lil Red' timestamp='1310349772' post='2265536']
ain't nuthin' sexier on a guy than a plain white tee-shirt and blue jeans.


ahem.
[/quote]
Sounds like you might like cowboy country.

[Lil Red]

[quote name='jaime (the artist formerly known as hot stuff)' timestamp='1310351673' post='2265547']
says the woman who flaunts her bellybutton
[/quote]
in my backyard with my kids is hardly 'flaunting'

[quote name='MissScripture' timestamp='1310353639' post='2265550']
Sounds like you might like cowboy country.
[/quote]
i don't know what you mean.

[Cherie]

[quote name='tgoldson' timestamp='1310340120' post='2265484']
I think that it is more difficult to be modest in a string bikini than in a one piece swimsuit, but I will not say that women who wear string bikinis are immodest women. Attitude and intention are important when determining if a person is modest. Clothing choice reflects only a portion of a person's attitude and intention.

I used to think about modesty and attire in a very black and white manner (and I still find it odd that some very conservative Catholic friends of mine chose to wear strapless wedding gowns for their nuptials), but the older I get the less I think I know about other people's intentions.
[/quote]

I agree that attitude and intention is important, and I wouldn't necessarily claim the woman herself wearing a bikini is immodest (unless she was acting immodest) ... but I think the objective clothing piece itself is immodest. See the difference? I don't think there is ever a time a bikini itself is a modest piece of clothing -- but I could understand a woman who doesn't know any better not being an immodest woman while wearing one. And I don't mean it to be about semantics, either - I think it's an important distinction.

[quote name='Azriel' timestamp='1310347461' post='2265519']
I must say, I guess I'm just a weirdo - but men look WAY more attractive in a well made suit than shirtless. Your mileage may vary, I guess.
[/quote]

100% true