Jump to content
An Old School Catholic Message Board

Ask Sister Marie


Lisa

Recommended Posts

Sister Marie, may I ask how you came to such a great degree of wisdom, charity, compassion and common sense at such a young age?

Was it maybe having a large family? Lots of job experiences?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[quote name='JoyfulLife' timestamp='1323634543' post='2349211']
Sister Marie, may I ask how you came to such a great degree of wisdom, charity, compassion and common sense at such a young age?

Was it maybe having a large family? Lots of job experiences?
[/quote]

I really don't think I have a lot of any of those things but what I do have is experience receiving them from other people.

I have a family that is completely crazy actually so I have had to do a lot of interior work on myself because of the things I experienced growing up. A lot of this work was done with the help and guidance of others who had/have much more wisdom, compassion, charity, and common sense than I probably ever will have. I am very grateful to God that, although it was incredibly difficult for me, I had the journey I did to where I am now. Most of the time when I comment on things I am doing some from similar experiences or thoughts as the person who wrote it.

I truly believe that everything that happens to us is an opportunity for God's redemption to touch the world through the person. All of my baggage and stuff has been redeemed... it's still difficult to carry at times but by carrying it and opening it to others His redemption is active in the world.

God desires not only our holiness but our wholeness as his beloved children. Holiness is impossible without wholeness.

So I guess that's the short response, haha. I always talk too much!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Sister Marie, I would agree with Joyful, I am totally in awe of your responses. If you don't mind me asking what community do you belong to?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Sister Marie, how generally do Sisters deal with times of grief, losing loved ones, funerals, stress, anger, etc.? I mean, now I can talk to my close friends and my counsellor, but what about in a convent?

Also, how do you advise discerning a possible call to religious life vs single vs marriage? How will I better know what God wills of me?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

RE - Grief and Loss

Different sisters handle things in different ways just like everyone else. There are people who withdraw for a time, people who don't want to be alone, people who seem fine and others who don't. First, in my experience one of the most beautiful things we do for one another as sisters is flood the funerals of our loved ones with our presence. The presence of so many sisters in the time of a sisters need speaks volumes more sometimes than any words can. We pray for their relatives out loud in our local convents and many times sisters send a letter or card after the loss just to show their care and concern. Sisters who live with someone who has had a death or loss in their family do as much as they can for the sister, knowing what she needs.

A sister told me once that love in religious life for our sisters is expressed in anticipation of the other sisters needs. We know one another and living together we can see when someone is struggling and what they might need to get through it. One sister might seem lost and not know what to do with her time so someone will find something she enjoys for her to work on and be creative with. Another sister might need some time alone and the superior might tell her to take a few up-nights (to your bedroom and relax nights). It all depends on the person.

We do all have sisters who are friends too who we can speak with more candidly about what we feel - just as long as we are not relying upon them to turn our sorrow into joy or our mourning into laughter.

On top of that of course is the fact that we are blessed to live in the same house as the blessed sacrament. He is the ever present heart of our lives with one another and it is a great comfort to know that at any time day or night we can be with Him.

RE - Stress and Anger

Stress and anger are a little more difficult. Probably because most often they are caused by some force within our convents. There is nothing wrong with feeling stress and anger but their expression is a little tricky. For instance, I live with the principal of my school. If I'm angry with her about something that happened in school it isn't appropriate for me to express that at home because it is her home as well. I have to reflect upon that anger and come up with a way to appropriately communicate it to her and make peace with whatever results from that discussion. If I'm angry with her for something that happened at home in the convent - sister to sister - then it depends on what happened. I could talk to my superior if it warranted it. I could just go to her at home and tell her she upset me and why. If it's something else then depending on the subject I could share it with the sisters. It all depends a lot.

As far as stress is concerned it depends. If you have taken on too much you may have to look and see what needs to be cut back in your life. If the stress is turning into anxiety then maybe you need something else.

In either of these situations you don't want to disrupt the life of the community and the other sisters. Yes, they should offer you any support they can give you but at the same time they need you to be a part of the community as well.

In all of these situations though there is the superior and your spiritual director to help you. You mentioned counselling so I don't know if you mean therapy by that but there are some sisters who are in therapy as well. Some communities may not readily do this but there are others who see nothing wrong with a sister getting the help she needs to work through an issue or a difficult time.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Discerning between marriage, single life, and religious life is an individual process. You need someone to guide you and walk with you to help you see whether what you are thinking and feeling are God's call to you or something else.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I just love Sister Marie! She has avvesome answers and she is AVVESOME!!! This isnt a lie either!


I am in her fan club...just kidding! :hehe:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[quote name='elizabeth09' timestamp='1323821499' post='2350723']
Sister,

Can sisters go to the March-to-Life or not?

elizabeth
[/quote]

I guess it depends on your community. I took the eighth graders last year.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[quote name='savvy' timestamp='1323822592' post='2350739']
Dear Sister Marie,

How do religious communities support themselves and look after their finances etc?
[/quote]

That depends a lot on the community. I really cannot speak for more monastic or contemplative communities because I think this is a place where there are probably more differences between the active and contemplative religious communities. In my community, there is a sister in charge in each local house of the money (with the superior) and a sister who is in charge of the money for the whole community. They pay the bills, deal with the insurance company... all that stuff. In my community there is also a report each month on what the money was used for that is hung for all the sisters to see and it helps each of us to call ourselves to accountability for what resources we use. Obviously, if I broke my leg, I need to go see the doctor... but did I need the new slip, shoes, or veil or not...?

We support ourselves by the work we do. Most of the sisters in my community are teachers, we are paid a salary that goes to the community. I really have no idea what my salary is. I also know that some of the sisters I live with do not receive a salary and so I know that we live off of the money I make. Just as when I was in formation I was living off of the money someone else made. We care for one another.

Did that answer your question or was there something more specific you wanted to know... if so I would be glad to clarify.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

she_who_is_not

How does your community handle chores/household duties in mission convents? Most of us are used to visiting Motherhouses, where things seem to work like a well-oiled machine. What is like at the smaller convent? Do you have a sister who is responsible for cooking and cleaning or do you divide chores/take turns?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[quote]Did that answer your question or was there something more specific you wanted to know... if so I would be glad to clarify.[/quote]

Your response was very helpful. Thank You. :)

Another question, I have is that because of the vows of poverty, can you do personal things for yourself, like eye-brows etc?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[quote name='savvy' timestamp='1323834500' post='2350941']

Your response was very helpful. Thank You. :)

Another question, I have is that because of the vows of poverty, can you do personal things for yourself, like eye-brows etc?
[/quote]



yeah eyebrows.....

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...