Ask Sister Marie

[Sister Marie]

I kept my Rosary(ies) when I entered and no one gave me new ones. I guess other communities might have another take on that but it doesn't seem to be anything that would disrupt the flow of formation. Mine are in constant turn over anyway. Right now I'm using one that one of my students made for me last year for easter. Eventually I'll probably give it away to someone I meet who needs it more. Then I'll go back to another pair. I also always keep one set under my pillow to pray when I'm going to sleep - they are usually on the floor when I wake up. But if you don't finish your guardian angel will finish it for you!

[das8949]

[quote name='Sister Marie' timestamp='1324337324' post='2353942']
I kept my Rosary(ies) when I entered and no one gave me new ones. I guess other communities might have another take on that but it doesn't seem to be anything that would disrupt the flow of formation. Mine are in constant turn over anyway. Right now I'm using one that one of my students made for me last year for easter. Eventually I'll probably give it away to someone I meet who needs it more. Then I'll go back to another pair. I also always keep one set under my pillow to pray when I'm going to sleep - they are usually on the floor when I wake up. But if you don't finish your guardian angel will finish it for you!
[/quote]

How sweet - do you know your guardian angel by name??? I have always longed for a guardian angel. sigh.

[Sister Marie]

I did ask him his name and he did tell me. I do like talking to him by name and when I finally knew it I had to apologize for being so rude for so long by not calling him by name! haha. I always have the kids ask their guardian angel their names on the vigil of the feast and then the first name they think of when they wake up is the name of their angel. They love to do it! In my community, the sisters in formation take the Guardian angels as their "feast day." We don't get a feast day until profession so the guardian angels served as our little celebration.

[MargaretTeresa]

[quote name='Sister Marie' timestamp='1324338221' post='2353959']
I did ask him his name and he did tell me. I do like talking to him by name and when I finally knew it I had to apologize for being so rude for so long by not calling him by name! haha. I always have the kids ask their guardian angel their names on the vigil of the feast and then the first name they think of when they wake up is the name of their angel. They love to do it! In my community, the sisters in formation take the Guardian angels as their "feast day." We don't get a feast day until profession so the guardian angels served as our little celebration.
[/quote]

Sister Marie, I have a few questions. First, which feast day do you refer to above.

I also have these questions from my thread "Bam"

[color=#282828][font=helvetica, arial, sans-serif]1. How did you 100% absolutely sure know that you were meant for religious life?[/font][/color]
[color=#282828][font=helvetica, arial, sans-serif]2. What are some good spiritual direction-ish books to read? (I'm still challenged in finding an SD and everything I read makes me want want want religious life)[/font][/color]
[color=#282828][font=helvetica, arial, sans-serif]3. How in the Sam Hill do I tell my mom without her killing me?[/font][/color]

[color=#282828][font=helvetica, arial, sans-serif]Also: Is it better to try to find an SD through the community I'm feeling most called to or to try to track one down in my area?[/font][/color]

[Sister Marie]

Hey MT,

First, the feast day I meant was the feast of the Guardian Angels, October 2nd ... sorry, I just took some cold medicine so maybe I wasn't clear about what I was trying to say! Or maybe you meant to ask about what I meant about the sisters having a feast day. Each sister has her own particular feast day which she receives the morning of her profession, usually but not always it is connected to her name. The sisters usually celebrate their feast by a specially prepared morning or evening prayer and their favorite dinner that night.

Now on to the other questions...

1.I think it is different for everyone when they absolutely know that they are meant for religious life. Recently the superior of my community was speaking to the sisters about the different difficulties everyone has in religious life. She said some people come to their entrance knowing that it is forever, others come to see and end up staying forever, others have to ask themselves everyday and renew their commitment for today... they each persevere to the end. For me personally, I knew the day I entered that I was casting in my lot with this community and it was a very realistic knowing. Yes, there were struggles and I had to grow into the sacrifice that that commitment entailed but I believed from the moment I met my community that this was where God was leading me and I listened for His voice to confirm that knowing and in time He did.

2. I would highly recommend reading any of Timothy Gallagher's books but especially [i]Examen[/i] and [i]Discernment of Spirits[/i]. They are both very practical yet challenging and are very helpful in any kind of discernment.

3. Well, every parent situation is different. My parents weren't thrilled but at the same time they really didn't care that much either. What are your mother's main concerns?

I don't know what type of community you are discerning with but I would make some good spiritual friends with some of the sisters in the community if you are able and save the actual spiritual direction for someone on the outside. You may have to live with the person someday and it could be awkward if they know your soul inside and out... I know some communities encourage their sisters to seek spiritual direction from only inside the community but it would not be my cup of tea and I do think it is wise, especially in communities that are larger and in which you will be moved around, for sisters to seek outside direction. I would recommend finding a religious sister, brother, or priest to help you though. I have found it much more helpful, no matter how holy the diocesan priest, to have a religious who lives in community. I could go on this for a while but is this helpful? Is there anything I left out?

[MargaretTeresa]

[quote name='Sister Marie' timestamp='1324340914' post='2353980']

3. Well, every parent situation is different. My parents weren't thrilled but at the same time they really didn't care that much either. What are your mother's main concerns?

[/quote]

That was very helpful! The problem with telling my parents - and especially my mom - is that she is very anti-Catholic. Oi

[i<3franciscans]

[quote name='DarleneSteinemann' timestamp='1324337746' post='2353951']
How sweet - do you know your guardian angel by name??? I have always longed for a guardian angel. sigh.
[/quote]
Hi, I do not mean to hijack this thread in anyway, but I just wanted to jump in and say --- [b]Everyone has a Guardian Angel[/b], no exceptions.

[Because I love Him]

Dear Sister

I once heard that our Guardian Angel's name is what virtue we need to learn the most, I was wondering if this is true.

Thanks!

[das8949]

[quote name='Because I love Him' timestamp='1324529524' post='2355756']
Dear Sister

I once heard that our Guardian Angel's name is what virtue we need to learn the most, I was wondering if this is true.

Thanks!
[/quote]

Then my angels name would be patience!

[Sister Marie]

[quote name='MargaretTeresa' timestamp='1324352932' post='2354166']
That was very helpful! The problem with telling my parents - and especially my mom - is that she is very anti-Catholic. Oi
[/quote]

Sorry for my delay.

Maybe, because your mother is anti-catholic, you could focus your discussion with her, whenever it happens, on some of the more human factors of your discernment. Maybe you could start with telling her how happy you are and then let her know what the really good parts of life as a religious are from a more secular vantage point. For instance, religious life is a balanced way of life that allows people to reach their true human potential (which is true... even if it isn't the reason you are entering). You will be doing good in the world.

Not knowing your mother, I don't know if this would work or not but it is good to try to approach this subject in a way that she is more familiar with and that can answer some of her concerns.

[Antigonos]

Rather obviously, Sister Marie, you are on the internet a lot. Is this something left to your discretion or do you have to request permission? Just curious...

Since the fictional Sister Luke was required to ask permission to drink a glass of water between meals [which seems a tad too strict, especially when in the African heat!] it's clear that the concept of obedience has changed a bit in the past 70 odd years.

[cmaD2006]

[quote name='Sister Marie' timestamp='1324340914' post='2353980']
Hey MT,

...
Now on to the other questions...

...
2. I would highly recommend reading any of Timothy Gallagher's books but especially [i]Examen[/i] and [i]Discernment of Spirits[/i]. They are both very practical yet challenging and are very helpful in any kind of discernment.

...
[/quote]

Ok ... its going to sound like I've been hired by the man (Fr. Tim Gallagher) to promote his materials. I haven't I just thoroughly enjoy his teaching and his books.

I heard the audio conference on the Discernment of Spirits. It is wonderful. It goes along with the book of the same name but it isn't simply an audio book.
He has a book/audio conference on Discerning God's will in your life (something like that). That I do recommend as well.

Definitely do Discerning God's will and Discernment of Spirits together ... they really seem to go hand in hand.

I also have the one on the Examen prayer ... but that one I couldn't get into ... I suspect it was because I'm not quite ready yet!

[Sister Marie]

[quote name='Antigonos' timestamp='1324622717' post='2356299']
Rather obviously, Sister Marie, you are on the internet a lot. Is this something left to your discretion or do you have to request permission? Just curious...

Since the fictional Sister Luke was required to ask permission to drink a glass of water between meals [which seems a tad too strict, especially when in the African heat!] it's clear that the concept of obedience has changed a bit in the past 70 odd years.
[/quote]

The short answer is that yes, I am on the internet what probably seems like a lot and no, I do not have to request permission. The long answer is that I am not a cloistered nun or sister in a contemplative community. I am a sister in an apostolic community - a community who's main aim is for the salvation of each sister and those to whom she ministers. I am a middle school teacher so many times my work brings me online. I have a laptop for my use which was given to me.

Just to give you a picture - most of the time when I am online I am typing my lesson plans, entering my grades in the online gradebook, posting to my teacher website for my students, uploading their electronic work, editing video projects they have done, searching for razzle dazzle things for the kids to do, previewing educational videos for school, creating online lessons which allow my students to work at their own pace, and when I have some free time checking in here or reading the news. I'm usually not just on here... usually I have a million tabs opened while I'm working on something and occasionally come back to post something, especially when I need a break from the other task . I also have a bad habit of just leaving everything open all the time anyway, haha. Right now I'm writing the Christmas prayer service for the sisters.

On another note, it really is essential for me to be up on what is going on in my students lives which usually also involves the internet (not their personal lives just things they are interested in or things I hear about which are causing problems). For instance, if a kid is threatened on facebook and I have no idea what that is - its going to make things very difficult. The internet is a real resource for me in my ministry. I also see it as an extension of my ministry because I do hope that I am [i]educating [/i]in a looser sense of the term here about apostolic religious life.

Sisters usually don't need to ask permission to do the job that they have received an obedience to do. This is very much a part of my apostolate. When a sister receives an "obedience" in the strict sense of the word she receives a piece of paper telling her where she is going and what she will do there. So I am already under obedience to teach at the place I am right now. That could change next year or the next year. There are things that I ask permission for but it usually isn't like in the movies. I don't go to "mother's" office and kneel to ask for toothpaste. I go ask the superior if I can have some money for new shoes. I ask if I can have a sleep in. Usually, the answer is yes and those smaller things are more of a courtesy than an exercise of authority and obedience.

[das8949]

[quote name='Sister Marie' timestamp='1324654340' post='2356367']
The short answer is that yes, I am on the internet what probably seems like a lot and no, I do not have to request permission. The long answer is that I am not a cloistered nun or sister in a contemplative community. I am a sister in an apostolic community - a community who's main aim is for the salvation of each sister and those to whom she ministers. I am a middle school teacher so many times my work brings me online. I have a laptop for my use which was given to me.

Just to give you a picture - most of the time when I am online I am typing my lesson plans, entering my grades in the online gradebook, posting to my teacher website for my students, uploading their electronic work, editing video projects they have done, searching for razzle dazzle things for the kids to do, previewing educational videos for school, creating online lessons which allow my students to work at their own pace, and when I have some free time checking in here or reading the news. I'm usually not just on here... usually I have a million tabs opened while I'm working on something and occasionally come back to post something, especially when I need a break from the other task . I also have a bad habit of just leaving everything open all the time anyway, haha. Right now I'm writing the Christmas prayer service for the sisters.

On another note, it really is essential for me to be up on what is going on in my students lives which usually also involves the internet (not their personal lives just things they are interested in or things I hear about which are causing problems). For instance, if a kid is threatened on facebook and I have no idea what that is - its going to make things very difficult. The internet is a real resource for me in my ministry. I also see it as an extension of my ministry because I do hope that I am [i]educating [/i]in a looser sense of the term here about apostolic religious life.

Sisters usually don't need to ask permission to do the job that they have received an obedience to do. This is very much a part of my apostolate. When a sister receives an "obedience" in the strict sense of the word she receives a piece of paper telling her where she is going and what she will do there. So I am already under obedience to teach at the place I am right now. That could change next year or the next year. There are things that I ask permission for but it usually isn't like in the movies. I don't go to "mother's" office and kneel to ask for toothpaste. I go ask the superior if I can have some money for new shoes. I ask if I can have a sleep in. Usually, the answer is yes and those smaller things are more of a courtesy than an exercise of authority and obedience.
[/quote]

I don't go to "mother's" office and kneel to ask for toothpaste. When I was in the order we did have to take our empty tube of toothpaste to our superior and she would slice it open and if there was unused paste, she gave it back to us to finish. Now this was in the late 60's so....We also had public examen each week where we confessed transgressions against our sisters. We made a game out of learning to keep our eyes downward by collecting stray pins from the Sisters veils.

[i<3LSOP]

Sr. Marie... do you have to tell Mother everything you have done wrong once a week or something like that? And do you have to do that before you enter?