Random Vocation Conversation

[ThereseMaria]

That's understandable, though... Ticking clocks can be absolutely the most annoying things ever!!!

[SilentJoy]

I'm sorry, I was trying to compare my clock-terror with your concern that a community would not accept your speech impediment, but I don't think they made a very good comparison (I shouldn't be awake anymore...) What I was trying to say is, feel free to mention whatever you are concerned about to the community and don't worry about them automatically giving you the boot just because you might struggle with something.

[ThereseMaria]

Ok, perfect, thank you! I was just hearing about some stuff having to do with communities being picky and somewhat rude to people over small things, so I just wanted to get someone else's opinion on the matter. Thank you!

[TheresaThoma]

I think the communities that are rude about the "small things" are definitely in the minority. Be open and honest with them and if they say they can't accept you because of that then you know for sure God isn't calling you there and you can move on in your discernment.

[PhuturePriest]

I was just wondering... This may seem like an odd question, but... Most orders won't give you the boot due to a minor speech impediment, right.......? (That's probably a really stupid question, but I just want to be sure.)

 

Absolutely not! I know priests with stutters, lisps, and I know a holy seminarian who I would bet my money will become a priest one day who has a speech impediment that makes it to where he can only speak in his falsetto. Priests do a ton more public speaking than Sisters do, and they certainly have a lot more meetings and everyday interactions with them (Depending on the community, of course, but in general), so if those impediments don't stop them, yours won't stop you. When I was a kid, I had a terrible stutter, and I'll still sometimes have the random off day where speaking can be a bit of a pain, but every time I brought it up to seminary directors, priests, and religious, they all said it was no big deal whatsoever.

Edited January 24, 2014 by FuturePriest387

[ThereseMaria]

Thank you so much for the clarification on that! I didn't know for sure whether it would be a huge problem or not, I wasn't sure, but I just wanted to make sure. Thank you :) (In case you haven't noticed, I haven't had a lot of contact with religious, and am really trying to piece everything together right now... But I'm glad to know that the "rude" communities are the minority, and that my speech impediment won't be a huge issue...)

[domenica_therese]

-(DominicaTherese) So a person doesn't necessarily have to date before visiting communities and getting in touch with vocation directors?

 

Certainly not! Not any more than someone needs to visit convents before they can date.  :hehe2:

 

At first I just wasn't interested, and no one asked anyway, but at this point I don't think I emotionally could date because my heart would feel too divided. I think it is only a problem if you see it as a problem, and if you enter religious life with this regret that you missed out. Perhaps the vocations directress was just making sure that when I said "I've never dated anyone" it wasn't secretly a statement full of angsty, bitter regret. :P

Edited January 24, 2014 by domenica_therese

[ThereseMaria]

-(Domenica_Therese) I'm glad dating isn't a requirement... Of course it is good for some people (so they can experience different parts of life and such), but it's not always the best route for EVERYONE... Depending on the person and where they are in life, I'm sure it could cause a bit of a conflict of interests...

[maximillion]

The most surprising thing about the convent? The gales of laughter that would occasionally sweep down the cloister from the community room. Just WHAT were those Professed actually getting up too.....?

 

Sorry little postulant, you'll have to wait a few years to find out.

 

Meanwhile, what about all the hilarity in the noviciate common room. Yes, what about that?

[ThereseMaria]

Well, I told my stepdad about my looking into becoming a nun... Didn't go as badly as I thought it would. Which is good. And I'm feeling rather peaceful now... SO I think I made the right decision in telling him. Of course, I still have a lot of time, so I didn't say I was becoming a nun for sure, just that I felt I might have a religious vocation, and that I was looking into it.

[Mary's Child]

I was just wondering... This may seem like an odd question, but... Most orders won't give you the boot due to a minor speech impediment, right.......? (That's probably a really stupid question, but I just want to be sure.)

As others have said it could depend on the community. It will definitely not be something that will keep you out of any religious order. I can think of a couple of sisters I know who have slight speech impediments.

 

[ThereseMaria]

I didn't think it should be too much of a problem... Or at least, I hope not. Usually you can understand me, but because I have difficulty with the "r" sound, everyone thinks I'm from New York/New Jersey. I couldn't really do any public ministry (talking at retreats and such...), but I don't think it would be a huge problem for monastic orders (as far as I can tell, brotehrs/sisters in the monastery don't talk for most of the day!!! Or at least, a few hours...)

[ThereseMaria]

-(Mary's Child) (If this isn't a personal question) are you entering a community soon?

[littlesister]

Having been the same too-young-yet age as you, I can agree that Emma' s advice was excellent all the way. Do what you can where you are and with the means at hand.   As for dating, if it looks attractive and you have the chance, do it.  It does make for a more informed decision in the immediate although sometimes it may seem that it is just a complicating factor. You might wake up the next morning, no matter how enjoyable the experience has been, and just know that something is missing that a few moments with Christ will fill.

 

Perhaps long after, when life gets heavy and grey as every one does at times, you will be spared the "What if..." or "Maybe I should have..."  temptations against your vocation.  We had a very wise priest during the novitiate who also worked with seminarians, and referred to those moment as "the Green Grass Syndrome".  In other words, the grass can always look greener on the other side of the fence, especially if you haven't walked through it and stumbled once or twice over the stones and holes that it can hide.

 

You seekers are all in my prayers that you will find the place that God has marked out for you and where your heart belongs.  There could be no greater grace.

 

Blessings.

[ThereseMaria]

-(LittleSister) Thank you! That's very reassuring. God bless :)

[Mary's Child]

-(Mary's Child) (If this isn't a personal question) are you entering a community soon?

 

Yes I am this weekend :) :heart: :bounce: :cloud9:
 

[ThereseMaria]

-(Mary's Child) Seriously?! CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!! I'll pray for you :) You must be incredibly excited!!!

[Hna.Caridad]

Mary's Child, you are in my prayers as you begin this next step of your discernment process.

[PhuturePriest]

I didn't think it should be too much of a problem... Or at least, I hope not. Usually you can understand me, but because I have difficulty with the "r" sound, everyone thinks I'm from New York/New Jersey. I couldn't really do any public ministry (talking at retreats and such...), but I don't think it would be a huge problem for monastic orders (as far as I can tell, brotehrs/sisters in the monastery don't talk for most of the day!!! Or at least, a few hours...)

 

I empathize with you. My greatest enemy is the 'H' sound. Which is of course problematic as a Priest, because preaching about Heaven and Hell is suddenly even more difficult. :P But trust me, if not being able to pronounce R's is your biggest issue in life, your life is pretty sweet. All the other religious in your community will have tons of problems of their own. Having a stutter does make life difficult, but it can be overcome. Have you ever thought about speech therapy? That really helped me out a lot.

[PhuturePriest]

I didn't think it should be too much of a problem... Or at least, I hope not. Usually you can understand me, but because I have difficulty with the "r" sound, everyone thinks I'm from New York/New Jersey. I couldn't really do any public ministry (talking at retreats and such...), but I don't think it would be a huge problem for monastic orders (as far as I can tell, brotehrs/sisters in the monastery don't talk for most of the day!!! Or at least, a few hours...)

 

And don't say you can't do public ministry! I don't care how bad your stutter is, it can be overcome. Just look at King George VI, who had to speak in front of millions of people, even though he stuttered terribly. I used to worry and agonize over my stutter, telling myself I could never be a priest because of it. But do you know what happened? Last summer I had to speak in front of a room of a hundred people, completely unprepared with nothing to read, and I was an absolute natural. I didn't stutter once, even though I did this repeatedly throughout the week, and everyone said I was really good. Keep in mind my stutter used to be so bad that I couldn't put two words together, and there I was, doing public speaking perfectly and in fact enjoying it immensely, something most people who don't have a stutter are afraid to do. So please, don't say you can't do it; it will take work, but the only thing that will make it impossible is if you decide it is.

 

Whenever I used to be apprehensive and agonize over it when I was younger, however, I would read this article about a stuttering priest, and it really inspired me: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/deaconsbench/2011/04/called-to-preach-how-a-priest-overcame-stuttering/

 

I was much like him in that I considered being a Carthusian because of it, but I realized that if I am indeed called to a religious vocation, it is centered towards preaching, speech impediment be damned.

 

If you want, I would love to talk to you about this privately. I struggled with it a lot in my life (And still do when I'm really nervous), and I've had speech lessons, so although it's not the same as actually being there coaching you through it, I could help you.

Edited January 30, 2014 by FuturePriest387