picchick Posted August 14, 2004 Posted August 14, 2004 [quote name='Mrs. Bro. Adam' date='Aug 14 2004, 08:15 AM'] *holds sheild up* I actually agree with him, except for the adultery part. Dating is supposed to be for preperation for marriage, and how can you prepare to be married to two different people, at the same time? Dating has been shifted greatly from its original purpose. Dating was used so the woman could choose who she wanted to marry, but this was also done only one person at a time. Courting, on the other hand, involved more than one person. Several men would court the same woman, to try and win her heart. When it got serious, then she'd only date one guy. If dating is supposed to be so you can date more than one person at a time, then why would so much pain be caused? Good question, huh? It's because of the significance put on dating. If you want to 'date' more than one person, just hang out and be friends with several guys, and when you find one you could possibly want to marry, then date him, not the other way around. [/quote] No, I am not talking about dating several people at once. I thought that the whole dating thing when it turned serious was called going steady. His thought is that when you start dating one person then you can't even think about other guys or whether or not they would be the right one. If that were to happen and I was in that relationship with him and my future spouse came along what was I to do? Would I be committing adultery? What if I wasn't sure about being married or being a nun? What if I thought about visiting nun orders too? I never thought that dating two people at once was a good thing. Never. But I don't believe in being closed minded when you are searching out God's Will.
MorphRC Posted August 14, 2004 Posted August 14, 2004 [quote name='Mrs. Bro. Adam' date='Aug 15 2004, 02:07 AM'] You can't base your complete decision on whether or not you have fun... It's, how well you get along, and how much you begin to love that person. No matter who you are, there will be times that you 'hate' the other person, and you don't have fun, but it's those times that will bring the two closer together. [/quote] That aint right. If you dont have fun together, then you dont get along, and your not happy with the person. Dating is an experience as well as a search for love and marriage
picchick Posted August 14, 2004 Posted August 14, 2004 [quote name='Mrs. Bro. Adam' date='Aug 14 2004, 10:37 AM'] You can't base your complete decision on whether or not you have fun... It's, how well you get along, and how much you begin to love that person. No matter who you are, there will be times that you 'hate' the other person, and you don't have fun, but it's those times that will bring the two closer together. [/quote] Sorry, I didn't mean to base the whole relationship off of having fun. If you do that then you're in a world of hurt. That is one of the things that you have to take in account. I agree with Morph. I didn't mean to make it sound like having fun is what you base whether or not the person is for you.
Mrs. Bro. Adam Posted August 14, 2004 Posted August 14, 2004 If you're dating someone, and someone else comes into the picture, and you get to know that person, outside of dating, as a friend, and find that they may be your future spouse, and the relationship you're in isn't going to be your future spouse, you simply break it off. That's it. You shouldn't date until you know that the other person could possibly be your spouse, anything else is a waste of your, and their time. Yes, you should have fun, but that's not what marriage and dating is all about. There will be down times, and if you don't have any down times, and get married, you're in for a big surprise. Marriage isn't all fun, because you're two different people living together, with two different upbringings. There's going to be times when you don't have fun, but it doesn't mean that you made a mistake, but it's a conflict that you have to take care of. Marriage is to be used for two people to come together and serve God. Raise children. There's a lot more to dating than having 'fun'
picchick Posted August 14, 2004 Posted August 14, 2004 Awesome!! I took lessons then for a few years and now am starting up again. I like it a lot.
Mrs. Bro. Adam Posted August 14, 2004 Posted August 14, 2004 I took about three or four years....been thinking about taking again, but not sure if I will... BTW- I think this thread has been officially hijacked!
franciscanheart Posted August 14, 2004 Posted August 14, 2004 no im bringing it back.... someone said to me the other day that dating in college is also pointless. im not sure i agree. i think dating is right when you are ready to be married whether that is in or out of college... maybe. actually let me get back to you on that one.... what do yall think though?
picchick Posted August 14, 2004 Posted August 14, 2004 [quote name='Mrs. Bro. Adam' date='Aug 14 2004, 12:08 PM'] I took about three or four years....been thinking about taking again, but not sure if I will... BTW- I think this thread has been officially hijacked! [/quote] lol Yay! My first Hijacked thread!!
franciscanheart Posted August 14, 2004 Posted August 14, 2004 lets not hijack this one.... this one is good and i think we should keep it going.... so about dating in college.... also, i know girls who have dated and gotten sexual, become pregnant. now whether or not they have the baby doesnt matter in society apparently. everyone looks down upon them when they made simple mistakes. their advice to me: dont be stupid. wait until you know you are ready. wait until you know that God is calling you to marriage and motherhood.
picchick Posted August 14, 2004 Posted August 14, 2004 [quote name='hugheyforlife' date='Aug 14 2004, 12:33 PM'] no im bringing it back.... someone said to me the other day that dating in college is also pointless. im not sure i agree. i think dating is right when you are ready to be married whether that is in or out of college... maybe. actually let me get back to you on that one.... what do yall think though? [/quote] I think that college dating is not pointless. My parents met in college and dated in college. I do think that people should date when they are old enough to understand dating. Like older than a freshman/sophmore in high school. :ph34r: For example, I see way to many kids in 6th and younger "dating". Younger dating will only lead to be boring with just holding hands. Then this will lead to being bored with giving little kisses. This will lead to being bored with hugging and it will lead to you know where to early. Dating requires focus on marriage and maturity. I don't think 6th graders are mature enough to be thinking about marriage.
picchick Posted August 14, 2004 Posted August 14, 2004 No hijacking. I like this thread. I think that it will help alot of people.
franciscanheart Posted August 15, 2004 Posted August 15, 2004 [quote name='picchick' date='Aug 14 2004, 12:41 PM'] I think that college dating is not pointless. My parents met in college and dated in college. I do think that people should date when they are old enough to understand dating. Like older than a freshman/sophmore in high school. :ph34r: For example, I see way to many kids in 6th and younger "dating". Younger dating will only lead to be boring with just holding hands. Then this will lead to being bored with giving little kisses. This will lead to being bored with hugging and it will lead to you know where to early. Dating requires focus on marriage and maturity. I don't think 6th graders are mature enough to be thinking about marriage. [/quote] I think though that some college kids aren't mature enough to date right away. Especially a lot of freshmen in college. I mean, they're just out of high school, not much difference. p.s. I think this could really help a lot of people too. Let's not hijack it again.
picchick Posted August 16, 2004 Posted August 16, 2004 I agree. Many of the college freshman have a high school attitude. However, I think that an immature attitude towards dating starts when girls/guys start young. Not a big avocate of dating young. My main reason for changing the subject was I thought that we needed to relieve some tension. I didn't mean for it to get too far. Sorry.
Sarcastic Stare Posted August 16, 2004 Posted August 16, 2004 When i first entered the world of dating i didnt even realize it. I thought i was going to the movies with someone and having fun, spending time with her, and then one recess im her boyfriend, lol. (yup i was young) but later on i grew up, had good experiences and bad, and matured my reasons for dating. if you had caught me about 7 years ago i would have said i dated girls because we had fun. now i date because im trying to find the right woman for me. someone i could not only see myself with for the rest of my life, but someone i would want to spend the rest of my life with. right now im in a very loving relationship with someone you all know. this relationship has taught me to treasure these bonds. i have to drive an hour and a half to see luthien, and just the warm fuzzy feeling i get when i see her is enough to tell me that i'm dating for the right reasons. :wub: (what other smiley would i use?)
Luthien Posted August 16, 2004 Posted August 16, 2004 You should date as if you are looking for your spouse, because thats what dating should be. Doesn't scare me that I might spend the rest of my life with my best friend. :wub:
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