Marie-Therese Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Ora, you know that can get you killed. LOL Mine is a horror story. I am supposed to have a hysterectomy sometime later this year. I was supposed to have it done last year but have kept putting it off. I have a condition that is basically causing my uterus to disintegrate. At least I have my one glorious girl, but knowing that I can never again have children is sad. I always dreamed of having a little boy. However, the thought of never again having to deal with periods is a definite plus to the situation. I try to keep it positive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archaeology cat Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 [quote name='Marie-Therese' date='28 August 2009 - 06:01 PM' timestamp='1251478914' post='1957247'] Ora, you know that can get you killed. LOL Mine is a horror story. I am supposed to have a hysterectomy sometime later this year. I was supposed to have it done last year but have kept putting it off. I have a condition that is basically causing my uterus to disintegrate. At least I have my one glorious girl, but knowing that I can never again have children is sad. I always dreamed of having a little boy. However, the thought of never again having to deal with periods is a definite plus to the situation. I try to keep it positive. [/quote] Aw, sorry to hear that! But if it's necessary, it's necessary. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rachael Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 [quote name='OraProMe' date='28 August 2009 - 11:18 AM' timestamp='1251472685' post='1957168'] Offer it up, ladies. *hides* [/quote] until you experience one, keep your trap shut. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Era Might Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 [quote name='rachael' date='28 August 2009 - 03:40 PM' timestamp='1251488418' post='1957371'] until you experience one, keep your trap shut. [/quote] Is it like stubbing your toe? Because I've done that before. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rachael Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 no. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VeniteAdoremus Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 [quote name='Marie-Therese' date='28 August 2009 - 08:01 PM' timestamp='1251478914' post='1957247'] Ora, you know that can get you killed. LOL Mine is a horror story. I am supposed to have a hysterectomy sometime later this year. I was supposed to have it done last year but have kept putting it off. I have a condition that is basically causing my uterus to disintegrate. At least I have my one glorious girl, but knowing that I can never again have children is sad. I always dreamed of having a little boy. However, the thought of never again having to deal with periods is a definite plus to the situation. I try to keep it positive. [/quote] [quote name='rachael' date='28 August 2009 - 10:40 PM' timestamp='1251488418' post='1957371'] until you experience one, keep your trap shut. [/quote] [quote name='Era Might' date='28 August 2009 - 11:05 PM' timestamp='1251489942' post='1957381'] Is it like stubbing your toe? Because I've done that before. [/quote] It's like half a teacup of your body slowly wrangles itself outwards. Basically. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marie-Therese Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 [quote name='Era Might' date='28 August 2009 - 04:05 PM' timestamp='1251489942' post='1957381'] Is it like stubbing your toe? Because I've done that before. [/quote] To have a genuinely female-empathetic experience: Step 1. Drink water until the entirety of your body is swollen and tender. Then drink more to ensure frequent trips to the toilet. Step 2. Hit yourself in the small of the back with a sledgehammer. This will serve a dual purpose: first, it will make you experience the sensation of low back pain related to cramps, and second, it will make you hella irritable. Step 3. Beginning just above the navel, cut yourself open with a rusty, dull blade. This will maximize discomfort. Take all intestines out, knot them in a giant wad, and then drape them up over your head. Now you have the weird hot flashes, probable headache, and terrible abdominal pain. Step 4. Maximize blood loss by leaving the wound open. Congratulations. Now do it again next month, for the next 30-40 years of your life. Only disruption to the cycle is to take 9 months off in order to swell to the size of an elephant and then pass something the size of a watermelon through an opening the size of a walnut. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missionseeker Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 I was thinking about this thread recently. I was trying to figure out if PMS is more pointless, though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rachael Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 [quote name='Marie-Therese' date='28 August 2009 - 05:18 PM' timestamp='1251494290' post='1957404'] To have a genuinely female-empathetic experience: Step 1. Drink water until the entirety of your body is swollen and tender. Then drink more to ensure frequent trips to the toilet. Step 2. Hit yourself in the small of the back with a sledgehammer. This will serve a dual purpose: first, it will make you experience the sensation of low back pain related to cramps, and second, it will make you hella irritable. Step 3. Beginning just above the navel, cut yourself open with a rusty, dull blade. This will maximize discomfort. Take all intestines out, knot them in a giant wad, and then drape them up over your head. Now you have the weird hot flashes, probable headache, and terrible abdominal pain. Step 4. Maximize blood loss by leaving the wound open. Congratulations. Now do it again next month, for the next 30-40 years of your life. Only disruption to the cycle is to take 9 months off in order to swell to the size of an elephant and then pass something the size of a watermelon through an opening the size of a walnut. [/quote] you're my new favorite Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrossCuT Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 [quote name='Marie-Therese' date='28 August 2009 - 05:18 PM' timestamp='1251494290' post='1957404'] To have a genuinely female-empathetic experience: Step 1. Drink water until the entirety of your body is swollen and tender. Then drink more to ensure frequent trips to the toilet. Step 2. Hit yourself in the small of the back with a sledgehammer. This will serve a dual purpose: first, it will make you experience the sensation of low back pain related to cramps, and second, it will make you hella irritable. Step 3. Beginning just above the navel, cut yourself open with a rusty, dull blade. This will maximize discomfort. Take all intestines out, knot them in a giant wad, and then drape them up over your head. Now you have the weird hot flashes, probable headache, and terrible abdominal pain. Step 4. Maximize blood loss by leaving the wound open. Congratulations. Now do it again next month, for the next 30-40 years of your life. Only disruption to the cycle is to take 9 months off in order to swell to the size of an elephant and then pass something the size of a watermelon through an opening the size of a walnut. [/quote] Wow, I laughed so hard I nearly peed my pants....oh wait. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Selah Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 [quote name='Marie-Therese' date='28 August 2009 - 06:18 PM' timestamp='1251494290' post='1957404'] To have a genuinely female-empathetic experience: Step 1. Drink water until the entirety of your body is swollen and tender. Then drink more to ensure frequent trips to the toilet. Step 2. Hit yourself in the small of the back with a sledgehammer. This will serve a dual purpose: first, it will make you experience the sensation of low back pain related to cramps, and second, it will make you hella irritable. Step 3. Beginning just above the navel, cut yourself open with a rusty, dull blade. This will maximize discomfort. Take all intestines out, knot them in a giant wad, and then drape them up over your head. Now you have the weird hot flashes, probable headache, and terrible abdominal pain. Step 4. Maximize blood loss by leaving the wound open. Congratulations. Now do it again next month, for the next 30-40 years of your life. Only disruption to the cycle is to take 9 months off in order to swell to the size of an elephant and then pass something the size of a watermelon through an opening the size of a walnut. [/quote] Spot. ON. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MIKolbe Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 [quote name='Marie-Therese' date='28 August 2009 - 03:18 PM' timestamp='1251494290' post='1957404'] To have a genuinely female-empathetic experience: Step 1. Drink water until the entirety of your body is swollen and tender. Then drink more to ensure frequent trips to the toilet. Step 2. Hit yourself in the small of the back with a sledgehammer. This will serve a dual purpose: first, it will make you experience the sensation of low back pain related to cramps, and second, it will make you hella irritable. Step 3. Beginning just above the navel, cut yourself open with a rusty, dull blade. This will maximize discomfort. Take all intestines out, knot them in a giant wad, and then drape them up over your head. Now you have the weird hot flashes, probable headache, and terrible abdominal pain. Step 4. Maximize blood loss by leaving the wound open. Congratulations. Now do it again next month, for the next 30-40 years of your life. Only disruption to the cycle is to take 9 months off in order to swell to the size of an elephant and then pass something the size of a watermelon through an opening the size of a walnut. [/quote] like the blade needs to be rusty...TOTAL EMBELLISHMENT you chicks exaggerate so much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marie-Therese Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 [quote name='rachael' date='28 August 2009 - 05:27 PM' timestamp='1251494828' post='1957410'] you're my new favorite [/quote] I live to serve. [quote name='CrossCuT' date='28 August 2009 - 05:55 PM' timestamp='1251496555' post='1957422'] Wow, I laughed so hard I nearly peed my pants....oh wait. [/quote] I can't laugh anymore, or I WILL pee my pants. That's the other downside of childbirth no one tells you. [quote name='Selah' date='28 August 2009 - 06:53 PM' timestamp='1251499994' post='1957463'] Spot. ON. [/quote] Thank you. [quote name='MIkolbe' date='28 August 2009 - 07:24 PM' timestamp='1251501853' post='1957484'] like the blade needs to be rusty...TOTAL EMBELLISHMENT you chicks exaggerate so much. [/quote] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MIKolbe Posted August 29, 2009 Share Posted August 29, 2009 [quote name='rachael' date='28 August 2009 - 03:27 PM' timestamp='1251494828' post='1957410'] MIKolbe's my favorite [/quote] well, duh! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rachael Posted August 29, 2009 Share Posted August 29, 2009 (edited) Edited August 29, 2009 by rachael Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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