Wearing Veils In Mass.

[DiscerningSoul]

I remember back when we did a 'wear a veil to Mass' for a Sunday for all of us [i]shy[/i] folk.
Readings some of the posts back then, I thought it might help some others who are 'on the wall' about wearing one to share our experiences when we started to wear one.

When I first started to wear one back in June of 08' of course it feels strange those 1st few times when you start. For me, I get to church early, put it on and my heart would feel like it was in my throat but by the end I felt better and only a couple people questioned me, Why? but after I told them, they seemed pleased with the reply. Right now I am the only one that wears one in my parish. I goto a very well attended church sometimes and yes, I feel abit out of place with the kids that stare but I just offer up those feelings for the salvation of souls.

Hope that helps.

[laetitia crucis]

Okay, so I'm definitely one of those that are "on the wall" about wearing one.

I very much [b]want [/b]to wear one -- for all the wonderful, beautiful, [i]reverent [/i]reasons there are to do so. Oh, how I want to!

So, why don't I?


Because I'm too CHICKEN...(or shy).




I mean, I [b]do [/b]have one, and I [b]have [/b]worn it. (In fact, I really love wearing it.) However, I've only worn it when others have worn it. That way I can at least rest assured that I wont be drawing attention to myself -- mine is bright white -- and well, I definitely don't want people to think that I'm trying to be "holier-than-thou". (Okay, I think that last statement of mine was probably a cop out. Sorry. )

Anyhoo... I've been pondering this for the last few months, so I'm really glad you posted this, DiscerningSoul! Reading your post gives me a bit more courage to veil at a Mass where NO ONE else does.

Although, recently I've found myself wondering how black dye takes to white lace... anyone know?

[DiscerningSoul]

[quote name='laetitia crucis' date='18 January 2010 - 08:09 PM' timestamp='1263859795' post='2039890']
Okay, so I'm definitely one of those that are "on the wall" about wearing one.

I very much [b]want [/b]to wear one -- for all the wonderful, beautiful, [i]reverent [/i]reasons there are to do so. Oh, how I want to!

So, why don't I?


Because I'm too CHICKEN...(or shy).




I mean, I [b]do [/b]have one, and I [b]have [/b]worn it. (In fact, I really love wearing it.) However, I've only worn it when others have worn it. That way I can at least rest assured that I wont be drawing attention to myself -- mine is bright white -- and well, I definitely don't want people to think that I'm trying to be "holier-than-thou". (Okay, I think that last statement of mine was probably a cop out. Sorry. )

Anyhoo... I've been pondering this for the last few months, so I'm really glad you posted this, DiscerningSoul! Reading your post gives me a bit more courage to veil at a Mass where NO ONE else does.

Although, recently I've found myself wondering how black dye takes to white lace... anyone know?
[/quote]
I will say a prayer for you!

For the price of dye you can get a black veil.

[laetitia crucis]

[quote name='DiscerningSoul' date='18 January 2010 - 08:16 PM' timestamp='1263860209' post='2039895']
I will say a prayer for you!

For the price of dye you can get a black veil.
[/quote]

Awesome! Thanks, DiscerningSoul!

If I can get the dye before Sunday, I'm totally veiling!!!! Yeeeeeah!!!!

[DiscerningSoul]

Hopefully more of us that are shy will join you!
Yeah!

[Tridenteen]

JMJ
Alright, well I feel that I have just a little bit of experience on this topic! My family was English Mass until I was in fourth grade. During that time, though, we were very conservative English. So I wore a veil then, periodically. I always liked it because I felt like I was in a saints movie, I had a weird haircut growing up, and because it felt [i]holy.[/i] I don't know if that makes any sense, though! Anyways, then we went Latin, and I began wearing my veil all the time. It really helps me focus during Mass, because I don't have to worry about whether or not I'm leading the teenaged tenor into sin because of my "crowing glory". Fr. used to tell us that men are often attracted to a woman by her hair, which is her crowing glory, and I have heard enough instances to justify this thought, and make it semi believable. Furthermore, I believe that it is a lesser distraction for men to have to sit behind a woman, who the only think they are looking at is a large peice of white lace, then for a man who is staring at a hot pink and blond ponytail. [img]http://www.phatmass.com/phorum/public/style_emoticons/default/fireman.gif[/img] Sorry, this is the closest thingk I can find to an emoticon in a veil.
For me, wearing a veil helps me become less distracted by worrying about my veil. I don't know if anyone else feels this, but I do. I have rather long hair, so I usually worry about whether or not it is coming out of it's style. But during Mass, I pin it up, and cover it (in case anyone is wondering, I sewed a thin metal comb into my good veil, and a plastice one into my everyday one) and I am good to go <Sonic Commercial> I think I already said something about the comparing wearing a veil to wearing a cassok with some seminarians, so I won't bother anyone with that. Oh, and Halo Works has a veil called [url="http://www.halo-works.com/product/HW036/Whisper.html"]http://www.halo-works.com/product/HW036/Whisper.html[/url] that you can buy to match your hair color for a few dollars, stays on, and no one can tell it's there. Most of the girls in my community wear white for purity (or floral scarves) and most of the married women wear black, to show they are married. No, that doesn't make sense to me, either, so hopefully no one will get offended :-). We usually wear veils whenever we are in a Church outside of Mass as well, when the Church has the Real Presence in it. Well, that was my two cents...Semper Fi!

[brightsadness]

As a child, whenever I went to Divine Liturgy with my grandmother (from Belarus) she put a scarf on me. I was about 12 when I started wearing one regularly. Our pastor asked me why and was satisfied with my response.

[dominicansoul]

I think Phatmass should organize a weekend conference, and part of the conference would be to go to the local parish Mass, all of us ladies wearing veils on our heads...at a novus ordo...that would be pretty cooool....

[Nihil Obstat]

[quote name='dominicansoul' date='19 January 2010 - 01:23 PM' timestamp='1263928992' post='2040235']
I think Phatmass should organize a weekend conference, and part of the conference would be to go to the local parish Mass, all of us ladies wearing veils on our heads...at a novus ordo...that would be pretty cooool....
[/quote]
I agree with a mean value of 127% on a normally distributed curve with a standard deviation of 2.3%.

[Thomist-in-Training]

[quote name='laetitia crucis' date='18 January 2010 - 07:22 PM' timestamp='1263860534' post='2039897']
Awesome! Thanks, DiscerningSoul!

If I can get the dye before Sunday, I'm totally veiling!!!! Yeeeeeah!!!!


[/quote]

Yeah! I don't know about dying, but if you're shy, having one closer to your hair color makes a BIG difference! For us brunettes and black-haired girls that makes black--one of my friends has voluminous brown hair such that you almost didn't notice she was wearing a veil, since it always makes that shape--and if you're a blonde I don't know what you do. But don't feel like you have to wear white if you're unmarried. Black really does blend in a lot more. Mine is white, but I had a black one before that--I was keeping it for someone. The white one was a gift, and since then I've never seen a black one I liked so I have just the one veil, and some random scarves.

[rosamundi]

[quote name='laetitia crucis' date='19 January 2010 - 01:09 AM' timestamp='1263859795' post='2039890']Although, recently I've found myself wondering how black dye takes to white lace... anyone know?
[/quote]

Depends on the dye and what the lace is made out of. Polyester takes up dye differently to cotton, which is different to silk, which is different to wool, which is different to linen. Natural fibres tend to shed dye much more easily, which could have unfortunate effects if you get caught in the rain whilst wearing it, or you have a priest who is particularly enthusiastic with an aspergillium

[Ora et Labora]

I loved wearing my veil too!!!! And then I stopped going to the Tridentine, and now I'm too shy to wear it a the NO! It's kind of sad, really.

[Piccoli Fiori JMJ]

I have two veils, and I've lost both of them because I am so nervous about actually wearing them, and then when I want to bring one with for a trip to the Monastery or some retreat, I can't find them The Lockport Dominicans got me started and it really felt great to have a veil that acted like blinders when there were so many people around and so many distractions!

We recently dug out my grandmother's hats, though. There is one black one in particular I really want to wear, but I'm not sure what mom would say about it.

Ukraine was the best thing ever. You looked totally out of place if you didn't have your head covered!

Edited January 20, 2010 by FutureNunJMJ

[Guadalupe23]

This is a very interesting topic to me because I have no experience with the veils in which you all are speaking. Just out of curiosity, what do you tell people when they ask you the "why?" Many of you mentioned that people ask and that they were satisfied with your answer....what was your explanation? (was it a simple answer or did you go deep into the topic?)

[Thomist-in-Training]

[quote name='Guadalupe23' date='20 January 2010 - 02:49 PM' timestamp='1264016962' post='2040938']
This is a very interesting topic to me because I have no experience with the veils in which you all are speaking. Just out of curiosity, what do you tell people when they ask you the "why?" Many of you mentioned that people ask and that they were satisfied with your answer....what was your explanation? (was it a simple answer or did you go deep into the topic?)
[/quote]

I don't have a fixed answer, I usually mumble something. One of my friends (a guy) is an apologist of the chapel veil in a mild way and usually says "For starters [i]Mary [/i]and [i]Veronica [/i]are always pictured with veils... and you want to be like them."

When I think about it, the true and actual reason that I started wearing a veil was 1. in the Tridentine Mass it's customary. 2. After I started going there, I spent an ungodly amount of time wrestling with some of this stuff on the internet and in one's head that comes up when you try to understand the whole Tridentine/New Mass thing. So wearing a veil or headcovering at the New Mass was a way for me to prove to myself that it was also a real Mass.
Syllogism:

1. It is praiseworthy to wear a veil at the Tridentine Mass (immemorial custom for women to cover their heads in some form at Mass, and recommended by St Paul in 1 Cor 11 "because of the angels"), [i]qua [/i]Mass.

2. The New Mass is also Mass.

3. It is praiseworthy to wear a veil at the New Mass.

I did feel shy about it, but I asked a priest I respected very much and he said he thought it was a good custom--and remarked laughingly how clever it was of the Spanish women to come up with such pretty lace headcoverings to fulfill the duty. So then I felt like I had "permission." I certainly did feel awkward for a long time, don't get me wrong.

For the shy I recommend: more neutral color as discussed above; or hats or a scarf over your hair. A hat will never raise anyone's eyebrows, in my experience, but it is still fulfilling the custom. (Unless they have a vague idea everyone, not just men, takes off their hat in church. Gently let them know that's a custom for men, not women.)

[SstrAli]

I love that this topic was brought up because I'm facing the same fear.

I want to wear one so badly, but NO ONE in my parish wears one and we are not the most traditional diocese in the US. The Latin Mass is only offered at the Cathedral of my diocese which is not close to me.

Is it wrong to wear one at a Mass that isn't NO or TLM? I don't have a veil yet, but I have deeply considered buying one.

And yes, what do you say when someone asks, "Why are you wearing that?"

Prayers!

Allie

[Tridenteen]

[quote name='SstrAli' date='21 January 2010 - 05:22 PM' timestamp='1264112546' post='2041836']
I love that this topic was brought up because I'm facing the same fear.

I want to wear one so badly, but NO ONE in my parish wears one and we are not the most traditional diocese in the US. The Latin Mass is only offered at the Cathedral of my diocese which is not close to me.

Is it wrong to wear one at a Mass that isn't NO or TLM? I don't have a veil yet, but I have deeply considered buying one.

And yes, what do you say when someone asks, "Why are you wearing that?"

Prayers!

Allie
[/quote]


JMJ
It is never wrong to wear a veil. I cover my head before Christ in the Tabernacle, and to honor His Presence, not because I am in a church. It is because of His Presence that I wear one, if that makes any sense? I go to daily Mass on the Fort periodically, and NO ONE wears a veil, or even a skirt, or even pants that cover them up, and I do feel as if people are staring at me. But I am there for God, not for them. [img]http://www.phatmass.com/phorum/public/style_emoticons/default/cans.gif[/img] When people ask me why I am wearing a "doily, hajib, dresser scarf, tablecloth....etc" on my head I tell them that just as so many Catholc Monarchs wouldn't wear their crowns in Church, because of God, who is Perfect and almight; I too cover up my crownig glory. And since the monarchs owed their royal titles to God, I too owe my "crowning glory" to God. And, if you don't mind me asking, if you aren't English or Tridentine Rite, what are you? Maybe I am missing something?

[SstrAli]

[quote name='Tridenteen' date='21 January 2010 - 06:29 PM' timestamp='1264116566' post='2041881']
JMJ
It is never wrong to wear a veil. I cover my head before Christ in the Tabernacle, and to honor His Presence, not because I am in a church. It is because of His Presence that I wear one, if that makes any sense? I go to daily Mass on the Fort periodically, and NO ONE wears a veil, or even a skirt, or even pants that cover them up, and I do feel as if people are staring at me. But I am there for God, not for them. [img]http://www.phatmass.com/phorum/public/style_emoticons/default/cans.gif[/img] When people ask me why I am wearing a "doily, hajib, dresser scarf, tablecloth....etc" on my head I tell them that just as so many Catholc Monarchs wouldn't wear their crowns in Church, because of God, who is Perfect and almight; I too cover up my crownig glory. And since the monarchs owed their royal titles to God, I too owe my "crowning glory" to God. And, if you don't mind me asking, if you aren't English or Tridentine Rite, what are you? Maybe I am missing something?
[/quote]

Tridenteen,

I wish I could gain the courage to veil. Like I said I don't have one right now, but I could get one. I feel as though I would be a distraction, as NO ONE wears skirts, veils, or hats in my parish and as I stated before we are not a very traditional diocese. I'd feel like people would just be staring at me.

Maybe I'm confusing myself. . . but I'm learning what the proper terms are for all of the Masses and I have yet to get it down.

The Mass that is said at my parish is everything is in English and the priest faces the people, not the tabernacle. Maybe you can help me out in determining what Mass that is? Thanks so much.

What is NO, what is English Rite, what is Tridentine Rite? I believe I have been to the TLM before (Latin, priest facing the tabernacle, symphony orchestra). . . .

God Bless,

Allie

[Lil Red]

[quote name='SstrAli' date='21 January 2010 - 05:05 PM' timestamp='1264118710' post='2041890']
Tridenteen,

I wish I could gain the courage to veil. Like I said I don't have one right now, but I could get one. I feel as though I would be a distraction, as NO ONE wears skirts, veils, or hats in my parish and as I stated before we are not a very traditional diocese. I'd feel like people would just be staring at me.

Maybe I'm confusing myself. . . but I'm learning what the proper terms are for all of the Masses and I have yet to get it down.

The Mass that is said at my parish is everything is in English and the priest faces the people, not the tabernacle. Maybe you can help me out in determining what Mass that is? Thanks so much.

What is NO, what is English Rite, what is Tridentine Rite? I believe I have been to the TLM before (Latin, priest facing the tabernacle, symphony orchestra). . . .

God Bless,

Allie
[/quote]
+JMJ+
a woman veils in her heart before she veils on her head.

NO = Novus Ordo. It is the Mass you describe, in the vernacular (in your case, English), with the priest facing the people.

a woman doesn't have to wear a skirt with her veil. i don't always.

you may be a witness to someone who needs it.

i'm not in the most traditional diocese either. in fact, i'm in probably the most liberal parish in the whole diocese. i still veil. i cannot help what other people think. i know why i am doing it, to be pleasing to God, and to emulate Mary, our Mother. if people want to judge me, then i must be humble and accept that, but to not veil (for me) would be displeasing to God.

God bless, Lil Red

[Archaeology cat]

[quote name='Lil Red' date='22 January 2010 - 04:49 AM' timestamp='1264135760' post='2042056']
+JMJ+
a woman veils in her heart before she veils on her head.

NO = Novus Ordo. It is the Mass you describe, in the vernacular (in your case, English), with the priest facing the people.

a woman doesn't have to wear a skirt with her veil. i don't always.

you may be a witness to someone who needs it.

i'm not in the most traditional diocese either. in fact, i'm in probably the most liberal parish in the whole diocese. i still veil. i cannot help what other people think. i know why i am doing it, to be pleasing to God, and to emulate Mary, our Mother. if people want to judge me, then i must be humble and accept that, but to not veil (for me) would be displeasing to God.

God bless, Lil Red
[/quote]
Very well said, Red. I'd been thinking about doing it for quite a bit before I started veiling - no one at my parish veiled, but then a friend came with me and she veiled, regardless of what others did, and that was the last push for me. I was still nervous about it at first, so I started with a headscarf. The only time I got a comment about it was when I wore the scarf more like a hijab instead of wrapping it around my bun. And on that occasion my husband quickly spoke up that veiling is a longstanding tradition in the Church. I do wear a mantilla a lot now, but sometimes wear a headscarf instead. Just depends on what I have with me.