HopefulBride Posted March 12, 2012 Author Share Posted March 12, 2012 He is thirty. Bi just think men take break ups harder than women. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sidemunch88 Posted March 12, 2012 Share Posted March 12, 2012 stage 5 clinger what a sad day for 30 year old Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HopefulBride Posted March 12, 2012 Author Share Posted March 12, 2012 no, it's just men. He's not the first to react that way and I'm guessing he won't be the last Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BG45 Posted March 12, 2012 Share Posted March 12, 2012 (edited) Men do take breakups harder than women actually. They're more likely to have less people to confide in than a female, she's more likely to keep all the mutual friends, etc. and this causes men to be more likely to engage in self destructive behaviors and depression than women. I mean, personally: [spoiler] I know it took me a good year and a half to two years to get out of the deep depression I sank into after I was dumped by someone I loved more than I cared for myself. Looking back it, no, it wasn't a healthy relationship for either of us at the end spiritually and emotionally; but that pain was still there. I considered hurting myself for longer than I'm comfortable thinking back on. I saw a lot of priests and I worked under a lot psychologists at the time, and that sort of informal help from both groups helped me a great deal to see myself as being my own person; I didn't need someone else to be beholden to as my other half that I always thought of as being better than me and that I could and would move on. Now though, I'm back to looking for a potential spouse and I wish she and her new boyfriend the best. He seems like a great guy and she deserves someone who will treat her as nicely and with the respect she deserves. I went on several "casual dates" this year, at least according to everyone who knew about them (six hour dinners, half a dozen of them in bistros and such) before being turned down when I used the D-word. But that's okay, B. and I are still friends and went to a concert together the other month. [/spoiler] Edit: Source: Simon, Robin W. and Anne Barrett. “Non-Marital Romantic Relationships and Mental Health in Early Adulthood: Does the Association Differ for Women and Men?†Journal of Health and Social Behavior 51: 168-182. Edited March 12, 2012 by BG45 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HopefulBride Posted March 12, 2012 Author Share Posted March 12, 2012 I wish men were able to see things differently though. I think part of the issue is what you said (lack of people to confide in) but there is also the lack of objective voice (I think) I have many girlfriends who wouldn't hesitate to tell me if the guy was a jerk and that I was being an idiot to want to stay with him - all in a loving way of course. However, I find that C had no one to tell him this girl was bad news (except for me, the ex-girlfriend) and though he knew it was coming from an objective place, he wanted so much to be in a relationship that he overlooked things he wouldn't have overlooked in a million years and found himself in love before he realized it. Now he has his aunts and some female cousins speaking to him hopefully he doesn't dismiss their advice as they're just being protective and realize that he shouldn't pick this girl over himself. Ok Ranting.... Over Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BG45 Posted March 12, 2012 Share Posted March 12, 2012 The objective voice thing could definitely be part of it too! He definitely has my prayers though, as someone who has been there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HopefulBride Posted March 12, 2012 Author Share Posted March 12, 2012 well hopefully he keeps getting better from here... He keeps slipping from "I won't put myself through this" to maybe it's salvageable...In other news... I made like 4 rosaries last night Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HopefulBride Posted March 13, 2012 Author Share Posted March 13, 2012 OK I need coasters for my office... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HopefulBride Posted March 14, 2012 Author Share Posted March 14, 2012 Sooo my little student stalker came in the office today...twice and called a few times. As if that's not enough, the stalker employee who was explicitly told NOT to come near my building was [b][i]IN [/i][/b]my office, [b][i]IN!!!!!!![/i][/b]. I'm calm, I'm calm, I'm calm, I'm calm..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HopefulBride Posted March 16, 2012 Author Share Posted March 16, 2012 I absolutely hate daylight savings time.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HopefulBride Posted March 16, 2012 Author Share Posted March 16, 2012 I'm supposed to go somewhere tomorrow but I don't know where or how to get there... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BG45 Posted March 17, 2012 Share Posted March 17, 2012 Google Maps? (Also sounds like you've had an awful day ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MIKolbe Posted March 17, 2012 Share Posted March 17, 2012 this thread is a hot mess. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HopefulBride Posted March 17, 2012 Author Share Posted March 17, 2012 Kolbe, you're a hot mess. Yeah BG yesterday was rough but I somehow managed to survive. I also found out (right before going to bed) where I was supposed to go and how to go there. Now I'm back and our retreat planning is going very smoothly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BG45 Posted March 17, 2012 Share Posted March 17, 2012 Glad things are looking up! Retreat planning is amesome! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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