My Diocese Doesn't Want Me

[linnie]

I know its so 20th century, but have you thought about writing a letter? Then you can lay out all of your questions and your concerns.

emails sometimes don't go thru and telephones don't always get answered. This is summer and perhaps people are on vacation, hence the unanswered phone.

Give a letter a try. Ask your questions respectfully and prayerfully and I'm willing to bet your get a response in kind.

blessings, linnie

[catholicinsd]

The worst part is, I haven't even officially applied.

[Deus te Amat]

please, i dont mean to be rude, but these people are giving you long pieces of advice that are amazingly well thought out and caring... all you do in return is one short sentance that makes you seem even more immature then you appeared before.

the least you can do is give the vocation station a complete explination... and responses or thank yous to people's replies


you are in my prayers, my south dakotan friend...

[catholicinsd]

[quote name='Deus_te_Amat' post='1368630' date='Aug 23 2007, 12:59 AM']please, i dont mean to be rude, but these people are giving you long pieces of advice that are amazingly well thought out and caring... all you do in return is one short sentance that makes you seem even more immature then you appeared before.

the least you can do is give the vocation station a complete explination... and responses or thank yous to people's replies
you are in my prayers, my south dakotan friend...[/quote]

I'm sorry I'm just really upset. But my Diocese did reject me even before I'd turned in my application.

[abercius24]

[quote name='catholicinsd' post='1368648' date='Aug 23 2007, 01:23 AM']I'm sorry I'm just really upset. But my Diocese did reject me even before I'd turned in my application.[/quote]

I think you need to get away on some missionary work. All the pressure from your schooling and discernment must have exhausted you these last few years. If you're like me, you get irritable and cranky when you're exhausted. You need to get away and reconnect with the zeal you once had when you first started down this path. Hook up with some missionaries and go live off of God's Divine Providence for 6 months where you can rekindle your calling. Then you'll remember that being a priest was only a bonus to the calling. Your calling remains.

When you get back, consider applying to some of the religious orders. By that time, you'll be glowing so much they'll know you are ready for the priesthood! You may not get to live in your hometown, but you will go where God calls you!

Steve S. -- abercius24
CatholicQandA.com

Edited August 23, 2007 by abercius24

[tojo]

And if you really want to do diocesan, you can always apply to another diocese, perhaps on enearby, or perhaps one further away.

I happen to know that the Diocese of Saginaw, MI (not mine, but nearby) is very eager for orthodox seminarians, and God has been bringing them from near and far. Several men from my diocese are studying for them, and I heard that God called someone from France to study for them!!!

[Deus te Amat]

"Pray. Hope. Don't Worry."

St. Pio

[catholicinsd]

[quote name='tomasio127' post='1368660' date='Aug 23 2007, 01:41 AM']I happen to know that the Diocese of Saginaw, MI (not mine, but nearby) is very eager for orthodox seminarians, and God has been bringing them from near and far. Several men from my diocese are studying for them, and I heard that God called someone from France to study for them!!![/quote]

Bishop Carlson, formerly the Bishop of my Diocese, appointed the VD who rejected me.

[linnie]

Forgive me but I'm a little confused. You say that you've been rejected by your diocese but also that you haven't even put in your application. Did the director tell you that you cannot apply? or did he tell you that you cannot apply right now? Perhaps he wants you to have a few more years of growth, maturity, and education.

I hope that you will be able to follow your vocation, whatever that turns out to be. You seem dedicated to the Lord and that is truly a wonderful thing.

blessings, linnie

[catholicinsd]

[quote name='linnie' post='1369352' date='Aug 23 2007, 08:12 PM']Forgive me but I'm a little confused. You say that you've been rejected by your diocese but also that you haven't even put in your application. Did the director tell you that you cannot apply? or did he tell you that you cannot apply right now? Perhaps he wants you to have a few more years of growth, maturity, and education.

I hope that you will be able to follow your vocation, whatever that turns out to be. You seem dedicated to the Lord and that is truly a wonderful thing.

blessings, linnie[/quote]

While I'm filling my application, the VD's were getting recomendations from people I know. From those that they received, they rejected me.

[Gemma]

I have no clue as to what was going on with that particular VD, but this isn't the first time I've seen someone rejected, and I know from personal experience just how painful it is. The rejection just about kills your soul.

Another discerner I'd been working with was really intent on a particular community, but they changed VDs, and the new one was, well, "green." The former VD was a "mature" sister (in the convent for many years), and after this bad experience, I advised the discerner to write the former VD to tell her how she (the discerner) had been treated. The former VD first wrote a note, saying she had received the letter, and was praying over the response. A few weeks later, another note came, saying that the new VD's lack of experience was probably the reason for how the discerner was treated.

Which makes me ask, how long has the diocesan VD had his job? Did they actually say that you were "too stupid and didn't have any friends," or is that a subjective interpretation of their decision?

If he actually said that, it's truly offensive, and the bishop needs to know how he's treating people. Once you've calmed down, contact him to let him know that you were offended by the words that he used. If he doesn't cooperate, then reiterate the conversations as objectively as possible in a letter to the bishop. Don't let the letter "drip with hate," either, or the only response will be "we will pray for you." An objective statement of the facts, and a precise, concise statement of your feeling offended should suffice.

Secondly, I think you're feeling betrayed by your "friends."

Offer it all up. Everything happens for a reason, and you were put on this Earth to do a job that only you can do. Just sit in God's lap and cry in His arms. Complain to Jesus--he's the VD's real Boss. And don't forget your loving Mother.

HTH.

Blessings,
Gemma

[catholicinsd]

[quote name='Gemma' post='1369824' date='Aug 24 2007, 07:44 AM']Which makes me ask, how long has the diocesan VD had his job? Did they actually say that you were "too stupid and didn't have any friends," or is that a subjective interpretation of their decision?[/quote]

The Head VD has been there a while, the assistant VD ( who actually wrote the letter) just received the appointment. While they didn't actually say those words, I could tell that's what they ment.

[linnie]

Instead of assuming what the letter meant (that you are too stupid and didn't have any friends) make an appointment with them. Ask if you can sit down and discuss the reservations that they have. Get their suggestions for ways that you can grow and mature so that you will be the kind of seminarian they are looking for.
To put those kinds of words in their mouths is a bit immature and probably won't help make your case.

[friarMatt]

As a Franciscan, rarely would I resort to Thomastic principles, but in this instance I will "Quid quid recipitur ad modum recipientis recipitur." or "That which is received is received in the mode of the receiver." Your posts are telling me a lot more about you than about the vocation directors. Live life for a couple years, mature a bit more, make friends, get a job or volunteer. God will use all of these oppurtunities to make you a better and holier man and will help you fulfill your vocation, whatever it may be....

[catholicinsd]

[quote name='friarMatt' post='1369893' date='Aug 24 2007, 11:03 AM']As a Franciscan, rarely would I resort to Thomastic principles, but in this instance I will "Quid quid recipitur ad modum recipientis recipitur." or "That which is received is received in the mode of the receiver." Your posts are telling me a lot more about you than about the vocation directors. Live life for a couple years, mature a bit more, make friends, get a job or volunteer. God will use all of these oppurtunities to make you a better and holier man and will help you fulfill your vocation, whatever it may be....[/quote]

But I don't have the money to do that.

[friarMatt]

You don't need money to get a job....actually that is usually the means to make money...

[Totus Tuus]

[quote name='friarMatt' post='1369893' date='Aug 24 2007, 11:03 AM']As a Franciscan, rarely would I resort to Thomastic principles, but in this instance I will[/quote]

Oh how I can wholeheartedly feel your pain

[Totus Tuus]

[quote name='friarMatt' post='1369893' date='Aug 24 2007, 11:03 AM']As a Franciscan, rarely would I resort to Thomastic principles, but in this instance I will[/quote]

Oh how I can wholeheartedly feel your pain

[quote]Live life for a couple years, mature a bit more, make friends, get a job or volunteer. God will use all of these oppurtunities to make you a better and holier man and will help you fulfill your vocation, whatever it may be....[/quote]

This is definitely good advice. I know he's not your spiritual director, catholicinsd, but you might discover quite a few priests giving you this advice over time as well.

[franciscanheart]

[quote name='catholicinsd' post='1369934' date='Aug 24 2007, 11:35 AM']But I don't have the money to do that.[/quote]
To get a job? That's the whole point.

[quote name='Totus Tuus' post='1369953' date='Aug 24 2007, 11:58 AM']This is definitely good advice.[/quote]
Yes, and advice, I'm pretty sure, that has appeared more than once in this thread. Take the advice CinSD.

[catholicinsd]

[quote name='friarMatt' post='1369949' date='Aug 24 2007, 12:53 PM']You don't need money to get a job....actually that is usually the means to make money...[/quote]

I mean to go back to school down the road.