More On P0Rn

[beatitude]

I don't understand the attraction to porn, as I've never felt it. The whole idea repulses me. Once I stumbled on some by accident, and I didn't find the sight sexually gratifying at all - it made me feel sick.

Perhaps this is because ever since I was very young I've known that the pornography industry preys on vulnerable women. Dr Mary-Anne Layden, the director of a women's psychological health service in Philadelphia who has worked with numerous women from the sex industry, has this to say:

[quote]"Most strippers, as with other women who work in the sex industry, are adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse. Research indicates the number is between 60%-80%. One study found that 35% of strippers have Multiple Personality Disorder, 55% had Borderline Personality Disorder, and 60% had major depressive episodes, These are severe psychiatric problems and many of them are connected to childhood sexual abuse. These are women who when they were little girls would get into their beds each night and roll themselves into a fetal position and every night he would come in and peel her open. The physical and visual invasion of little girl's bodies damages them psychologically and gives them a psychologically unhealthy view of sexuality. Often as adults they reenact their childhood trauma by working as strippers, Playboy models, and prostitutes. The men who, now as customers, physically and visually invade the adult women's bodies, reenact the role of the perpetrator. These women work in the sex industry because it feels like home."[/quote]

Of course not all women in the sex industry have been abused. There is a chance you are watching a woman who chose to be there, who isn't suffering from terrible psychological trauma. But the chances that she has been abused and is suffering the consequences are far higher than the chance that she is not.

Can anyone derive pleasure from looking at such a thing, knowing that?

[Paladin D]

A lot has been said in this thread, so I'll keep it short.

Sexual immortality (including pornography) is so rampant in our society I often wonder if anyone, let alone even us, will ever make it through Heaven. It's a very discouraging thought, and often times I wonder how it'll ever change anytime soon.

[Nunsense]

I was thinking about porn again after watching an old episode of Boston Legal late one night. One of the lawyers was dating this woman who turned out to be a high paid call girl on the side. when he found out, he was appalled and broke off with her.

This made me wonder if any guy, who either uses prostitutes or looks at porn, would be happy to find out his own girlfriend (wife, sister, mother etc) was either a prostitute (highly paid or not) and/or a porn star.

It seems the it's okay to look at porn and/or use prostitutes but not to have one's loved ones actually work in the industry. Shouldn't this in itself tell people that the whole thing is wrong, and make them stay away from it? I guess not, but it did make me think of how often people have a double standard about this.

[MissyP89]

[quote name='beatitude' timestamp='1324511926' post='2355497']
Can anyone derive pleasure from looking at such a thing, knowing that?
[/quote]

Porn is about selfishness. Those who enjoy it consider the girls (and guys) to be objects to be used or products to be consumed, not real people with real emotions.

[BigJon16]

[quote name='beatitude' timestamp='1324511926' post='2355497']
Can anyone derive pleasure from looking at such a thing, knowing that?
[/quote]

As a hormone enraged 16 year old, I will say that I do in fact struggle with the "P" word, as much as it pains me to admit it. I wasn't sure if it was the right thing to say on here, being it is a fairly public forum, and the only person I've ever told was my confessor and a few close "brothers in Christ." I don't want to put anyone in an awkward position, either.


I know all of these things about porn that you mentioned. I understand that its wrong. But that doesn't always seem to stop me, for some reason. Am I a horrible person? Probably.

The last thing on my mind when these temptations arise is "the mental" welfare of these people. Most of the time, they seem to be having a jolly ol' time, or just acting. Maybe that's the lies of the media, but temptation is a strong thing, and trust me, "when it rains, it pours". I never feel "slightly tempted". Its always pretty full on...

The devil has a way of pulling me in, as he knows that it is my weakness. It's my cross, and its a large struggle for me.

I think most psychologists and a lot of the posts on this thread are missing the spiritual-warfare part of an attraction to porn. They don't call Satan the "Great deceiver" for nothing...


None of those suggested cites with all the preventative stuff seemed to help, BTW.

Also, I will probably regret this post, at some point. Out of shame our guilt, Im not sure yet. But I felt like I had to chime in.


"Saint Michael the Archangel..."

[BigJon16]

[quote name='MissyP89' timestamp='1324519198' post='2355582']
[b]Porn is about selfishness[/b]. Those who enjoy it consider the girls (and guys) to be objects to be used or products to be consumed, not real people with real emotions.
[/quote]


I agree with what I turned into bold print.



I disagree with the rest. The whole "objects to be used" thing never had crossed my mind. Its much more internal. I wouldn't be able to describe it, unless the person I was describing it to had struggled with the same thing before. Even then, I wouldn't feel very comfortable describing it.

But that's just me...

[Nunsense]

I don't suffer from an addiction so I don't know what it feels like but I wonder if it is just that the feeling is so good (at the time) that the rational part of the brain shuts down? I have seen people with lung cancer, emphysema, and even with a trach tube, still smoke a cigarette! They know they are killing themselves but they can't seem to stop, and it isn't just the physical aspect of the addiction because that can be eased with patches and other things, it must be the feeling controlling them? And it must be terrible.

[Nihil Obstat]

[quote name='Era Might' timestamp='1324511152' post='2355489']
I knew this thread was going to be trouble when I opened it lol.

In the old days I would have posted a sentimental highfalutin reflection on conjugal love, but I've learned a lot from Winchester over the years, so I'm going to make it real simple. Put a ring on her finger and you can do it three times a week, four if you're lucky. That's not so bad a deal. Otherwise wear a hair shirt, grit your teeth and bear it.
[/quote]

[mod]great picture, but not family friendly link on the picture. sorry! -Lil Red [/mod]

Edited January 2, 2012 by Lil Red

[DMcB]

Jon -

I've been thinking about your posts, and I've been thinking of how I can give you advice as someone that didn't try to live a chaste life. The best I can come up with is this:

Our actions have consequences. Sure, the Lord forgives us, all we have to do is ask. But there is a component to all of this that may not have been discussed, and that is how living an unchaste life affects all of our relationships: past, present and future.

The demons you're battling are demons that I'm still battling today - 20 years after many bad habits took root. And after decades of sin, those bad habits now haunt me at the most inopportune times, and continue to have a negative affect on my life. I won't be the one to tell you this is a war that is going to end anytime soon, but the sooner you get control of the situation, the easier it will be down the road. You'll be especially thankful you put in the work while young and relatively free of responsibility. Nothing makes a man feels worse than dropping the ball when time is short and others are depending on you. Not only will this not be a distraction, but you'll be able to focus on improving your soul in so many other ways.

[i]Mother Mary, Queen of Heaven, please pray for both Jon and I as we seek to live as your Son taught us. Amen. [/i]

Edited December 22, 2011 by DMcB

[Papist]

Just listened to a podcast with the founder[Catholic] of this website as the guest.

[url="http://www.theporneffect.com/"]http://www.theporneffect.com/[/url]

[BigJon16]

[quote name='DMcB' timestamp='1324574016' post='2355929']
Jon -

I've been thinking about your posts, and I've been thinking of how I can give you advice as someone that didn't try to live a chaste life. The best I can come up with is this:

Our actions have consequences. Sure, the Lord forgives us, all we have to do is ask. But there is a component to all of this that may not have been discussed, and that is how living an unchaste life affects all of our relationships: past, present and future.

The demons you're battling are demons that I'm still battling today - 20 years after many bad habits took root. And after decades of sin, those bad habits now haunt me at the most inopportune times, and continue to have a negative affect on my life. I won't be the one to tell you this is a war that is going to end anytime soon, but the sooner you get control of the situation, the easier it will be down the road. You'll be especially thankful you put in the work while young and relatively free of responsibility. Nothing makes a man feels worse than dropping the ball when time is short and others are depending on you. Not only will this not be a distraction, but you'll be able to focus on improving your soul in so many other ways.

[i]Mother Mary, Queen of Heaven, please pray for both Jon and I as we seek to live as your Son taught us. Amen. [/i]
[/quote]

Thanks man.

[DMcB]

I just remembered this song on the matter...what a pervert:
[html]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_bP48M2BEs0[/html]

Edited January 2, 2012 by DMcB

[Pope St Clement 1]

[quote name='brianthephysicist' timestamp='1321542661' post='2337395']
Sorry for again derailing, but this needs to be said.

I came back to the Church early this year and after a few months of intense struggle, I was able to break my addictions to both porn and masturbation. I have been clean and free for just shy of 7 months now. [b]I am a man living a chaste life.[/b] It is [b][i]NOT[/i][/b]​ easy, but it [b][i]IS[/i][/b] possible. And even though some might say I've only been living this way for a relatively short period of time, I'm already seeing the benefits of my chastity. The only way to break this addiction is to stop "sugar-coating" it and recognize that it is a matter of life and death.
[/quote]

It is indeed possible to live a chaste, and it sure has benefits! I am a male who, by the grace of God, hasn't masturbated in almost 13 years and I've never felt freer in all my life!