Dating/courtships And Physical Touch

[Jesus_lol]

[quote name='Sacred Music Man' date='23 December 2009 - 01:16 PM' timestamp='1261603016' post='2025148']
"macking"? Is that a spelling mistake?
[/quote]

nope, slang for making out, or in some instances flirting "ie, man i saw john macking on bethany all night, but he got nowhere with her"

Edited December 23, 2009 by Jesus_lol

[jeffpugh]

Okay. Thanks.

[Moosey]

[quote name='Jesus_lol' date='23 December 2009 - 05:18 PM' timestamp='1261603112' post='2025152']
nope, slang for making out, or in some instances flirting "ie, man i saw john macking on bethany all night, but he got nowhere with her"
[/quote]
Yeah, I mean it as the former. Making out and such.

[Lil Red]

[quote name='Sacred Music Man' date='23 December 2009 - 02:16 PM' timestamp='1261603016' post='2025148']
"macking"? Is that a spelling mistake?
[/quote]
+J.M.J.+
nope.

[jeffpugh]

[quote name='Lil Red' date='23 December 2009 - 04:57 PM' timestamp='1261605432' post='2025219']
+J.M.J.+
nope.
[/quote]
A little late on the uptake...

[XIX]

[quote name='Slappo' date='04 December 2009 - 05:37 PM' timestamp='1259962647' post='2014477']
I have to highly highly disagree with the bolded line. Human love grows in perfection but is not itself perfect.

The descriptions you gave above can be reached during this life, but even then only with heroic virtue and grace. To say only those with heroic virtue can be in love is majorly false. It is [b]through love[/b] that we attain heroic virtue.

I love my fiancee, but I may not yet ungrudingly take her to the bathroom and clean her body and the bathroom from her bowel movements. I would still do it, but not ungrudingly or uncomplaintant in my heart. Will I reach a point where I could do such an action completely lovingly? I hope so, but just because I can't now doesn't mean I don't love her.
[/quote]
There is also a big difference between falling in love with someone and loving someone.

[Moosey]

There isnt?

[XIX]

Falling in love has mostly to do with emotions. Loving someone is a decision to do what's best for your partner, even when you emotionally don't "feel like it."

We can't really decide whom we have feelings towards, so it follows that we don't have total control over whom we fall in love with. Of course by loving someone [i]unconditionally, [/i] we can cultivate the feelings of romance and such. But the decision to love another person is very different from falling in love.

[Moosey]

Oh, we're agreed then. I thought you said there wasn't a difference between the two when there is in fact a decided difference. I love my brother but I'm not in love with him.

[missionseeker]

[quote name='Slappo' date='22 December 2009 - 04:46 PM' timestamp='1261518411' post='2024650']
the fact that you're far away makes it all the more reason for you to not get really close for long periods of time.

Distance makes the heart grow fonder... distance also makes the hormones turn into raging barbaric fiends that will stop at near nothing before getting their way.


I haven't seen my fiancee in 5 months and she comes in 4 days... Our boundaries are set higher then ever before and we're more strict about them because of how much we miss physical touch.
[/quote]
For some reason, and I am not sure how to word why, I just can't agree with this. Maybe it's because our relationship is completely opposite of yours in that it's mostly long distance whereas yours at least for a while was not. I don't know. But I find the idea that distance makes the hormones turn into "raging barbaric fiends" as a little odd. I mean, sure it's an issue. But I think it's an issue for all relationships, not just long distance relationships. But the key is to remember the other person, you know? I don't want to be an obstacle for him. And despite however much I might *want* to keep kissing him, I know that not only do *I* have to keep myself chaste, but I want to make sure that I don't wreck his chastity either. Cuz there really is nothing better than kneeling at the communion rail beside him.

[quote name='Nihil Obstat' date='22 December 2009 - 05:34 PM' timestamp='1261521256' post='2024680']
I know this is kind of 'common knowledge' and all that, but I'll be honest, I have my doubts. I'm not convinced guys are actually that different when it comes to something like that.
[/quote]

I could agree with that.

[kayla_veronica]

My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost three years. We were not always chaste, but about six months before I became Catholic we decided to become chaste until marriage, as was expected of us by God. Now we cuddle while watching movies, hold hands, hug and kiss but not make out. I think that it depends for each couple which is appropriate. If the physical touch is arousing it is dangerous because it can lead places you don't want to go. Even if the physical touch stops at making out, if you are aroused it is much easier to have sinful thoughts, which should also be avoided. I don't think any couple should go farther than making out before they are married though, because lust can seize hold of a person after that. Idk, hope I explained myself clearly enough.

[jeffpugh]

[quote name='kayla_veronica' date='25 December 2009 - 12:04 AM' timestamp='1261717490' post='2025761']
My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost three years. We were not always chaste, but about six months before I became Catholic we decided to become chaste until marriage, as was expected of us by God. Now we cuddle while watching movies, hold hands, hug and kiss but not make out. I think that it depends for each couple which is appropriate. If the physical touch is arousing it is dangerous because it can lead places you don't want to go. Even if the physical touch stops at making out, if you are aroused it is much easier to have sinful thoughts, which should also be avoided. I don't think any couple should go farther than making out before they are married though, because lust can seize hold of a person after that. Idk, hope I explained myself clearly enough.
[/quote]
This sounds to be a moderate view. Thanks for sharing and bearing witness!

[Antigonos]

I wonder how many of this forum's members, who are unmarried, are being honest in their replies.

I also wonder how many of this forum's members, who are unmarried, are virgins, both men and women, since so many of you don't think that sex before marriage is permissible. Reading some of these replies made me think about the 1950s, and the Sixties film "Carnal Knowledge". I'm old enough to remember marathon dorm discussions about whether a girl who French-kissed on the first date was "fast" or not.

Given my professional experience in OB/GYN for the past 40 years, you are all either very odd or dishonest, but after all, who's counting?

[CatherineM]

My husband is the only man I have ever been with, and we married at the age of 43, so it is certainly possible to control your passions. My husband was not a virgin. I will admit however to being quite odd, at least by western society standards.

[Noel's angel]

Antigonos, I would disagree with you that people here are either odd or liars. Maybe the views expressed are 'odd' compared to what modern society urges us to do, but they certainly fit in with God's plan for the world, and that can never be odd.

[jeffpugh]

[quote name='Antigonos' date='25 December 2009 - 02:57 PM' timestamp='1261771026' post='2025974']
I wonder how many of this forum's members, who are unmarried, are being honest in their replies.

I also wonder how many of this forum's members, who are unmarried, are virgins, both men and women, since so many of you don't think that sex before marriage is permissible. Reading some of these replies made me think about the 1950s, and the Sixties film "Carnal Knowledge". I'm old enough to remember marathon dorm discussions about whether a girl who French-kissed on the first date was "fast" or not.

Given my professional experience in OB/GYN for the past 40 years, you are all either very odd or dishonest, but after all, who's counting?
[/quote]
What do you mean, exactly? I'm being honest in this question.

[Nihil Obstat]

[quote name='Antigonos' date='25 December 2009 - 01:57 PM' timestamp='1261771026' post='2025974']
I wonder how many of this forum's members, who are unmarried, are being honest in their replies.

I also wonder how many of this forum's members, who are unmarried, are virgins, both men and women, since so many of you don't think that sex before marriage is permissible. Reading some of these replies made me think about the 1950s, and the Sixties film "Carnal Knowledge". I'm old enough to remember marathon dorm discussions about whether a girl who French-kissed on the first date was "fast" or not.

Given my professional experience in OB/GYN for the past 40 years, you are all either very odd or dishonest, but after all, who's counting?
[/quote]
I was perfectly honest, but thanks for the insinuations anyway.

[CatherineM]

It is this type of belief that we can not control ourselves, that fuels the idea that we have to supply contraception to children, and sex education to kindergartners.

[Moosey]

[quote name='Antigonos' date='25 December 2009 - 03:57 PM' timestamp='1261771026' post='2025974']
I wonder how many of this forum's members, who are unmarried, are being honest in their replies.

I also wonder how many of this forum's members, who are unmarried, are virgins, both men and women, since so many of you don't think that sex before marriage is permissible. Reading some of these replies made me think about the 1950s, and the Sixties film "Carnal Knowledge". I'm old enough to remember marathon dorm discussions about whether a girl who French-kissed on the first date was "fast" or not.

Given my professional experience in OB/GYN for the past 40 years, you are all either very odd or dishonest, but after all, who's counting?
[/quote]
Think what you want but I'll swear on my life that I'm telling you the absolute truth. I'm very much a virgin and would rather die than throw away my virtue by being promiscuous. I think it's despicable of you to assume things about people you don't know. And don't you dare say you know me. Because you most certainly do not and I hope you never will. I won't be exposed to ridicule and false accusations.

[tinytherese]

[quote name='Antigonos' date='25 December 2009 - 02:57 PM' timestamp='1261771026' post='2025974']
I wonder how many of this forum's members, who are unmarried, are being honest in their replies.

I also wonder how many of this forum's members, who are unmarried, are virgins, both men and women, since so many of you don't think that sex before marriage is permissible. Reading some of these replies made me think about the 1950s, and the Sixties film "Carnal Knowledge". I'm old enough to remember marathon dorm discussions about whether a girl who French-kissed on the first date was "fast" or not.

Given my professional experience in OB/GYN for the past 40 years, you are all either very odd or dishonest, but after all, who's counting?
[/quote]

Sirklawd and I are very dedicated to promoting to the message of chastity. He started a website http://www.demandyourdignity.com/ and facebook and I started a chastity club on my secular college campus.