TeresaBenedicta Posted July 7, 2011 Share Posted July 7, 2011 I head out tomorrow morning. Interview on Friday. I doubt I'll be posting between now and when I get home... so y'all will have to wait until Sunday to find out what happens!! I'd appreciate prayers between now and then, though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
faithcecelia Posted July 7, 2011 Share Posted July 7, 2011 [quote name='TeresaBenedicta' timestamp='1310018784' post='2263944'] I head out tomorrow morning. Interview on Friday. I doubt I'll be posting between now and when I get home... so y'all will have to wait until Sunday to find out what happens!! I'd appreciate prayers between now and then, though [/quote] Prayers and thoughts for you xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FutureSister2009 Posted July 7, 2011 Share Posted July 7, 2011 I'll be thinking of you while I'm in Retreat TB! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LadyOfSorrows Posted July 7, 2011 Share Posted July 7, 2011 [quote name='FutureSister2009' timestamp='1309829150' post='2263159'] Yes I am definitely more nervous about the traveling than I am about the actual retreat. I'm just afraid of getting lost in the station. I don't want to be the next missing person. [/quote] Don't worry traveling on a train. Train stations are much easier to navigate than airports. I took a train to see some nuns in Buffalo, and it was really relaxing and enjoyable. Train rides are just so romantic to me. it's a great time to journal and pray. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FutureSister2009 Posted July 7, 2011 Share Posted July 7, 2011 [quote name='LadyOfSorrows' timestamp='1310050119' post='2263996'] Don't worry traveling on a train. Train stations are much easier to navigate than airports. I took a train to see some nuns in Buffalo, and it was really relaxing and enjoyable. Train rides are just so romantic to me. it's a great time to journal and pray. [/quote] I'll be praying alright! I'll be praying that whoever is supposed to be picking me up doesn't forget about me! I know I'm just thinking of things to worry about! I don't know if that's the devil's work or what. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FutureSister2009 Posted July 8, 2011 Share Posted July 8, 2011 Bye everyone! See you Monday! Don't forget us this weekend!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
To Jesus Through Mary Posted July 8, 2011 Share Posted July 8, 2011 [quote name='FutureSister2009' timestamp='1310091630' post='2264246'] Bye everyone! See you Monday! Don't forget us this weekend!! [/quote] :clap::clap: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HopefulBride Posted July 8, 2011 Share Posted July 8, 2011 [quote name='FutureSister2009' timestamp='1310091630' post='2264246'] Bye everyone! See you Monday! Don't forget us this weekend!! [/quote] Prayers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MessorCarus Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 Prayers for all of you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MargaretTeresa Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 Prayer prayer prayer prayer for everyone going on retreat this weekend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FutureSister2009 Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 Okay so I guess I'll share what happened, I had been feeling stress all week leading up to the Retreat. But I was certain I wanted to go anyway. Yesterday I was feeling the most fear and anxiety about it. I don't know what it was. I really wanted to go but at the same time I didn't. I just didn't know what to do. So I finally came to the conclusion that I didn't want to go. Now today, I wish I had gone. I contacted the convent and said I wasn't going and how bad I felt. That's the second time I've cancelled on the SSVMs. But there is still a part of me that feels an attraction to them. I fear now that when I say I do want to visit them, they won't believe me. I feel like they'll say that if I can't commit to visiting them, then how will I ever be able to commit to Religious Life? That does make sense. I feel like I'm questioning my whole Vocation now. But I really DO want it. I've been thinking about my Franciscan Community and how I was attracted to them first and they are still ultimately my first choice. I have to talk to them when they come back, God-Willing before I go away to school to see what they can arrange. Right now, I don't want to think about it, I just want to focus on being an aide for Vacation Bible School next week. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
das8949 Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 [quote name='FutureSister2009' timestamp='1310219935' post='2264936'] Okay so I guess I'll share what happened, I had been feeling stress all week leading up to the Retreat. But I was certain I wanted to go anyway. Yesterday I was feeling the most fear and anxiety about it. I don't know what it was. I really wanted to go but at the same time I didn't. I just didn't know what to do. So I finally came to the conclusion that I didn't want to go. Now today, I wish I had gone. I contacted the convent and said I wasn't going and how bad I felt. That's the second time I've cancelled on the SSVMs. But there is still a part of me that feels an attraction to them. I fear now that when I say I do want to visit them, they won't believe me. I feel like they'll say that if I can't commit to visiting them, then how will I ever be able to commit to Religious Life? That does make sense. I feel like I'm questioning my whole Vocation now. But I really DO want it. I've been thinking about my Franciscan Community and how I was attracted to them first and they are still ultimately my first choice. I have to talk to them when they come back, God-Willing before I go away to school to see what they can arrange. Right now, I don't want to think about it, I just want to focus on being an aide for Vacation Bible School next week. [/quote] I am feeling your difficulty with determining what to do in your life. You remind me of myself when I was your age. I do not know you and do not want to overstep my boundaries, but I do believe you need to slow down a bit and enjoy your youth! Live in the moment not in the past or your perception of the future. We cannot get the past back and the future is not ours yet. Try to deepen your faith and listen quietly to your inner voice. That is God and he is trying to talk to you but you need to be still to hear him. Get a spiritual director at your new school. God Bless Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maggyie Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 [quote name='FutureSister2009' timestamp='1310219935' post='2264936'] Okay so I guess I'll share what happened, I had been feeling stress all week leading up to the Retreat. But I was certain I wanted to go anyway. Yesterday I was feeling the most fear and anxiety about it. I don't know what it was. I really wanted to go but at the same time I didn't. I just didn't know what to do. So I finally came to the conclusion that I didn't want to go. Now today, I wish I had gone. I contacted the convent and said I wasn't going and how bad I felt. That's the second time I've cancelled on the SSVMs. But there is still a part of me that feels an attraction to them. I fear now that when I say I do want to visit them, they won't believe me. I feel like they'll say that if I can't commit to visiting them, then how will I ever be able to commit to Religious Life? That does make sense. I feel like I'm questioning my whole Vocation now. But I really DO want it. I've been thinking about my Franciscan Community and how I was attracted to them first and they are still ultimately my first choice. I have to talk to them when they come back, God-Willing before I go away to school to see what they can arrange. Right now, I don't want to think about it, I just want to focus on being an aide for Vacation Bible School next week. [/quote] I think your feelings are quite normal for someone as young as you are! One thing to avoid is putting too much emphasis on visits... a visit is just a visit, it doesn't mean you are pledging yourself to enter! Perhaps that contributed to the anxiety? You mustn't put too much pressure on yourself to deciderightnowquick! I think what you should do is - keep discerning. But give yourself more growing-up time out in the world. Finish your degree, maybe get a job for a couple years after leaving school? If you enter at a later point and discover you aren't meant for religious life after all, work experience and education are useful in the event God calls you out of the convent. I don't believe it's really true that people can "lose" their vocation by taking the time to discern fully- if God really wants you in religious life He will still be calling at 28 if He is at age 20. We are the ones with the tight timelines and schedules for our lives, not God. Being outside of time has its perks For humans, time has a way of revealing us to ourselves. In my diocese they just ordained a man who realized he was called to the priesthood in his late 30s, and it goes the other way too - many women, after giving themselves time to discern fully, realized they were called to marriage and not consecrated life in spite of their attraction. Holiness is attractive in all its forms, but not everyone is called to that type of consecration - I am one of those girls who found this out after some trial and tribulation, and I am glad I did because now I am engaged to be married to a Gospel-centered man and the spiritual peace is amazing. I thank Jesus every day for this gift of knowing myself and my vocation. It took several years to bear fruit in my soul, though, and in the meanwhile I spent a lot of time writing to communities and going on (or avoiding) visits. I am sure the Sisters understand your feelings, too! But I am sure the would appreciate if a little time passes and you gain more life experience before starting the discernment process again with them (if you still feel called to them at that point). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chamomile Posted July 10, 2011 Share Posted July 10, 2011 Maggie gave wonderful advice to you, FutureSister! Take that to heart and remember that we're praying for you. And you, too - keep praying and trusting in God Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FutureSister2009 Posted July 10, 2011 Share Posted July 10, 2011 Thank you for being so helpful! I do understand what you're saying but I just want it so much. I really don't want to wait around for it. I don't want to take my final vows in my 40s or 50s. The whole discernment process will still take time once I'm there and the only way I can really know what it's like is to experience it. I really feel strongly about it. I still have to wait a year regardless so I will take time to grow up while I'm at school. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts